Requested by: jaeminchul
Characters: Kim Heechul and Ahn Minhee
Writer: minukkie
Title: To Have You

 

“I love you,” was the last thing he whispered into her ears before he took off to another country on that airplane. She could faintly remember the warmth of his embrace and that delicate feeling that emitted from that look deep in his eyes as they bid their goodbyes. They promised to stay faithful to each other despite the distance that will keep them apart. She promised that she will wait for his return, and he promised that he will come back soon.

It has been four years since that day, and Minhee is still faithfully waiting for his return. She regretted it each day for rejecting his plead to have her come along with him. Otherwise she wouldn’t have to endure the pain of missing him every second since he left. She had hoped for time to go by faster so that she could see him again soon, but then again, she too had a lot to accomplish for herself. She had to remain professional.

Every week, Heechul would make sure to call her at least once, and they would talk for hours until late at night, sharing their hearts’ content and whispering sweet nothings until they fall asleep. At first, Minhee thought that long distance relationships aren’t as bad as what other people had reckoned. But after a year passed, she was starting to feel the longing of being in the safety of his arms. She wanted to be able to touch him, to feel him, to be able to tell herself that he was ‘real’. But it was slowly appearing to be an illusion in her mind. Though despite it all, she knew she had to stay strong. She had made a promise, and Ahn Minhee never breaks a promise, especially not the promise made with Kim Heechul.

“Minhee, it’s late. Aren’t you going home yet?”

She lifted her chin and met the eyes of a female colleague. Then her own questioning eyes shifted to the clock on the office wall and she gasped at the time. “Shoot! My train leaves in five minutes!” Minhee stood up too quickly from her office chair, causing it to fall. While fidgeting to get her chair back to its original position, she accidentally knocked off some stack of documents from the table. She sighed hopelessly.

“I can give you a lift home if you’d like,” the other female offered, feeling bad for Minhee.

“No it’s fine. I just need to run,” Minhee hastily said and was ready to dash out, but was stopped by the other female.

“It’s a fifteen minutes’ walk to the train station. I don’t think you can arrive there in less than five minutes even if you’re a running athlete. Come on, I’ll take you home in my car.”

Minhee wanted to object to the proposal, but her circumstances aren’t allowing her to do so. It was already late, and if she didn’t arrive at the train station on time, it’ll be another hour before the next train arrives, and that’ll be too late for a girl like her to be going home alone. She sighed and nodded. “Thank you so much, unnie.”

~~~

Absolutely a lot of things crossed Minhee’s mind while she was in the car. Living images of Kim Heechul that was beginning to fade in her mind suddenly re-entered her consciousness. She recalled on what actually got her distracted that day. The day’s newspaper had announced a matter that should’ve arrived first at her ears long before it was to happen, or told to the public. Heechul hadn’t said anything about his return to her, but it has been widely reported that he will arrive at the airport around midnight, which will be in a few hours. She’s his girlfriend, his potential wife, she should be the first to know yet she knew nothing of these. She felt so hurt…

“Is something bothering you, Minhee. You seemed pretty distracted since this morning.”

Minhee exhaled. “It’s nothing, unnie. Honestly.” She bit her lip, a habit she always does when she was not telling the truth.

“If you say so,” she returned and the car halted to a stop, announcing that they have arrived at Minhee’s home, a home she shared with her best friend Taeyeon since they both started their working life. “If you have any problems, or if you need a day off, just let me know okay? You’ve been working too hard.”

Minhee waved the leaving car goodbye and entered the house to find a half-sleeping Taeyeon on the couch. At the sound of the door closing, Taeyeon’s eyes creaked open and bulged at the sight of Minhee. She jumped off and began screaming, “Ahn Minhee, where have you been? You were supposed to be home an hour ago! And who was that? Did a guy just send you home? Minhee, are you already forgetting abou--”

“Taeyeon! I’m fine and nothing happened, okay.” Minhee walked over to the couch and sat down with a huff, feeling exhausted to her bones. Taeyeon followed her. “And it was a ‘she’ who was kind enough to give me a lift home.”

Taeyeon’s lips formed an ‘O’ shape and she began to settle beside Minhee on the couch. “So why are you late?”

“I lost the track of time.”

“Tch,” Taeyeon gave a playful smirk. “You’ll never recover from that workaholic habit of yours, will you?” Taeyeon’s eyes examined Minhee’s expression and she could sense that something was wrong. Minhee wasn’t accepting the tease as how she would usually do. “Yah, what’s wrong? Did something happen?”

Minhee stared at Taeyeon in pained amusement. “I really can’t hide anything from you, can I?” she muttered weakly.

~~~

The next day, Minhee took the day off just as offered. She stayed in bed and clutched her phone tight to her side, in case Heechul would finally give her a call. The morning news on television had just showed a clip of him arriving at the airport. It was very short, but she saw it, even though Heechul was looking downwards all the time, avoiding the gazes of the camera. He has finally returned, but it seemed that she wasn’t the first person that he wished to see. She hoped that he would want to listen to her voice at the very least. But that too seemed too much to ask for. She hated to think that he could have forgotten about her, or worse, if he has found someone else.

Tears started to trickle down her cheeks at the thought. His passiveness towards her started very subtly after they reached the end of their second year apart. It was hard to notice at first, and Minhee had always pushed away all those negative thoughts as soon as they came. She knew trust is all it needs to keep the relationship going strong. She had put all her trust in him, but now, she wasn’t sure if it was the right thing to do anymore.

She admitted it. She misses him so damn much. She wanted to see him, to feel his love for her all over again. She just can’t run away from her own needs and feelings.

“But he has broken his promise,” she whispered to herself, suddenly the feel of anger arose from within her. “He doesn’t deserve this. I should just forget about him.” She stared at her phone’s screen for a moment, which had the picture of them at the airport four years ago, in each other’s loving embrace. Suddenly she felt like ripping his face apart. She clutched tighter, hoping that the phone would crumble like paper, and threw the phone away. It hit the wall and crashed on the floor. Her sobs became more obvious as the seconds ticked away.

“I hate you, Kim Heechul. I hate you for leaving me hanging like this. I hate you. I hate you!”

The next few minutes were filled with groans of frustration and crashes of heavy objects. “How dare you ignore me so easily like this? What am I to you? Did you know how much of a distraction those four years were? I waited for you, you bastard. I waited for four freaking years for you!!”

“Minhee? Minhee! What the hell are you doing in there?” Taeyeon who had just arrived rushed to her door and struggled with the locked knob. “Minhee, stop throwing stuff around, you’re hurting youself. He’s not worth your pain!”

Then there was a moment’s silent.

“It has been five months since he last contacted me,” Taeyeon heard her shaky whisper. “He’s already left me and I didn’t even realise it. I’m so stupid!”

~~~

Minhee used the rest of the day to mourn over her own stupidity. When the next day arrived, she had vowed to start her new life, a life without him. She’s going to erase those painful parts of her life and start again. It’s not worth staying faithful anymore when it was clear that he wasn’t doing the same. Perhaps it was a lie from the very beginning, another one of his sarcasm antiques.

Days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months, yet Minhee still couldn’t get her life in place like she wanted it to. Of course, she blamed everything on Kim Heechul who had pretty much disappeared from her life. If only he didn’t approach her back then… If only he didn’t ask her to wait for him, everything would’ve turned out better. She would still be the focused Ms Four Eyes and would be living a very happy life and achieving her life’s goals much sooner. It was his entire fault.

“Minhee,” Jaejoong’s voice called out to her from across the table. “What would you like to eat?” he asked in hushed tones and his eyes darted towards the awaiting waitress who came to collect their orders. Minhee had been spacing out.

“Sorry. Em, I’ll have what he’s having. Thank you.”

The waitress nodded, wrote everything down and took back the menus before leaving the table. Minhee muttered an apology to Jaejoong as soon as she was gone. Jaejoong didn’t mind, as always.

Minhee told Jaejoong everything about what happened between her and Heechul since that day. As a good friend, Jaejoong listened to her heart’s content patiently, and has been acting as Heechul’s stand-in without even meaning to. It has been long since Jaejoong admitted his own feelings for her. But her happiness was what mattered most. He wouldn’t want to be stealing someone else’s property unless she wants him to.

Then, the vision caught her. She was just looking around the restaurant when she saw him, eating all alone at a table at the other end. All the air left her lungs and she nearly forgot how to breathe. Jaejoong saw it, and he turned to look at what she was looking at. And his face fell unconsciously.

“Oh my God, he’s here. Jaejoong, he’s just over there,” Minhee started fidgeting and lost control of her conscience. “What should I do?”

Jaejoong returned his gaze at her. “It’s up to you, darling. Whatever you decide to do, you know I’ll always be here for you.”

And as if on cue, Heechul looked up as well and saw her looking at him. His fork dropped to the floor. Desperation conquered her insides and she was about to run into his arms when a voice in her head reminded her of what he has done. He was the one who called for the silent separation, and this is what he’s supposed to get. Minhee did leave her seat, but instead of walking towards the man who once conquered her dreams, she ran out and disappeared from everyone’s vision. She wasn’t strong enough to face this.

And to Jaejoong’s amusement, Heechul went running after her.

~~~

“Minhee!”

Her strides only became faster at his calls. Her tears were streaming down like river by now.

“Minhee, stop! Please!” he pleaded and tried to grab onto her wrist but failed a few times, but managed to in the end. They both finally stopped and Heechul doubled over momentarily to catch some breath. His grip was tight. “Listen…”

“I’m sorry, sir. Do I know you?” she blurted monotonously while wiping away her tears with her free hand. Heechul was left stunned at that, face hurt.

His grip on her wrist loosened and she began to walk away. “I tried to call you…” he almost whispered. “But the number was cancelled.”

Minhee kept on walking, and Heechul followed slowly behind her, allowing some space between them. She was in no mood to interact with him.

“Minhee, look at me,” he sounded desperate. “Minhee, please, talk to me. Baby…”

She kept on pretending like he didn’t exist. The soft calls for her only brought more tears to her eyes, but she wasn’t going to give in. She wasn’t going to appear weak in front of a guy like him. This is her new life, and he doesn’t deserve any part in it anymore.

Her attitude was solid, and his patience was thinning. “Damn it, can’t we just talk for a while?!!” he suddenly shouted, making some pass-byers jump in surprise, including Minhee.

She finally stopped in her tracks, waiting for him to speak. When he was still silent after a minute, she began to walk away again.

“You said that you would wait for me!” he stated out loud, making her stop again.

“And what did you think I was doing all these years, you selfish brat?” she spat out, finally turning to face him. “Did you think it was easy to just wait and wait? I’ve waited for five months just to hear your voice again, you idiot, and not to mention the three and a half years of not being able to be with you physically… and look at what I got,” she pointed out to him. “THIS!”

“Minhee, I have my reasons for what happened between us,” he softly began, but was stopped by her.

“Save it. I don’t want to hear any of it.”

~~~

Bouquets of fresh roses arrived at her office the next day. A note was attached in between them.

‘I’m sorry for breaking your heart. Please allow me to fix it. I miss you so much… --Love, Heechul.’

Minhee scoffed at the note. She didn’t even hesitate when she threw it away. She stood up from her seat, gathered a few bouquets and began to give them away to her fellow colleagues. Each staff received at least a rose to decorate their work desk, leaving her with none. By the end of it, she was very pleased with her actions.

“I bought them for you, not for them,” a saddened low voice from behind startled her. “What have I done so wrong that caused you to treat me like this?”

Minhee turned to look into Heechul’s serious expression. “So you think you’ve done something wrong?”

“Minhee, listen to me now,” he came closer and pinned her to her chair. “I’m sorry for not telling you that I’m coming back. And I’m sorry for not calling you for months now. I just… I thought I was protecting you.”

“You call this protecting?” Minhee referred to herself who was already and clearly broken. “I’ve never believed in happy endings before, Mr Kim. Not until you happened. But now, you made me feel so stupid for changing my mind.”

Heechul bit his lips hard and closed his eyes momentarily. “Minhee, I still want to have you in my life. Please don’t do this to me.”

“You did it to me first!”

“I did it because I love you!!”

And then there was silence.

Both of them stared into each others’ eyes, trying to interpret the meaning each of them beholds. Heechul was the first to break the trance and he began to release her.

“Can we just forget about this and return to before it even started?” Heechul suggested softly. He was trying to avoid from making the matter worse.

“Do you seriously think it’s that easy? I didn’t even know what happened and you expect me to forget those things that kept mocking on my face?”

Heechul had his fists tightened. “You really want to know what happened? Fine. Here’s the whole story. My family decided to dig into my private life one day and when they know that I’m dating you, everything changed. My calls were monitored and my moves were restricted. They threatened to disown me if I kept on keeping in touch with you, so I had to slow down. You have no idea how much I missed you every day and night since then, Minhee. It nearly killed me.”

She was silent at hearing his lengthy confession. “So what happens now?”

“I was hoping that I would never have to tell you this, but guess what, I’m officially disowned!” he announced with a bitter smile. “I ran away from home just to be with you. At least now we have something in common,” he walked closer to her. “And I can’t tell you when I was coming back, because they’ll know and they’ll stop me from leaving that country. I had to see you again…”

Minhee bit down on her lips. “You shouldn’t have done that. Heechul, go back to your family.”

“What? No! Definitely no!” Heechul immediately went to grab her arm, but was harshly pushed away. “Minhee, I don’t care about the money, the status… I just want to be with you!”

She ignored him and dialed for security. She held back her sobs. She didn’t mean to destroy Heechul’s life like this. It was her fault. She knew it was time for her to let go.

~~~

Heechul was dragged away by the security that day, leaving Minhee alone in her office to cry her heart out. She had to push him away so that he could stop and see. He needed to realise that this will never work. It will never work…

“Sweetie, you’re spacing out again,” Jaejoong said to her.

“I’m sorry. I was thinking about something.”

“About Heechul?” Jaejoong guessed, causing her to gasp. “You do know that you’re only hurting yourself by being like this, right?”

Minhee nodded in defeat. “But it’s just not meant to be, Jae. I don’t want to push it. There are more important things I need to focus on in life.”

Jaejoong shook his head side-ways. “Listen to me, sweetheart. It’s not every day that a person is able to meet their soul mates. Some never did. But you did. So why are you letting him go so easily?”

“It will never work out, Jae. I can’t keep being delusional when it’s clear that I’m not wanted in his family.”

“But he loves you and you love him. What more could you ask for?”

“Acceptance! God, why are being so pushy about this.”

“I don’t want to see you hurt like this, that’s all.”

“Jaejoong,” she whispered desperately after a moment of thought. “I don’t know what to do…”

“Listen to your heart, darling.”

~~~

“Heechul…”

The gorgeous male that has been looking at his feet the whole time looked up to the sight of his angel. Despite the gloomy feeling that was floating in the air, he couldn’t help from letting his heart leap at the sight of her. He knew then that it had to be her and no one else. If only he wasn’t the Kim Heechul that was supposed to inherit a whole lot of fortune of the Kim family. If only he had a brother…

He stood up from the chair and went closer to her. “Baby…” he whispered unconsciously.

Minhee heard his whisper and bit her own lips. “Heechul, I’m begging you one last time. Let’s just cut this clean…”

“I still don’t want to,” he immediately objected. “Haven’t you heard me before? I want you in my life no matter what, and I’m going to make sure that the whole world knows how much I love you. I don’t care what other people say.”

“Heechul, please don’t go against the wishes of your family. They are everything to you.”

“YOU are everything to me, Minhee. I don’t care. I’ll do what I have to do to make you mine eternally.”

Minhee stared at him disappointedly. “Did you know that the one thing I regret most in life right now is not having a family? You have it, so cherish it!” She nearly screamed at him. “Even if your family wants you to marry another girl, then marry her!”

His stare was intense for a while before he came to her, grabbed her palm and shoved something into it. “I want YOU to marry me and become my family, nobody else,” he commanded.

Minhee stared at the velvet box that was resting in her palm now. “How romantic…” she mumbled sarcastically. “But please, stop this--”

“Don’t you dare say no or I’ll never kiss you again.”

Minhee managed to laugh at this. “I haven’t got a kiss from you for a very long time but I didn’t die. I think I can live with that for another ten, fifty years.”

His eyes bulged and he began to tower over her with pissed off eyes. He took steps forward, making her step backwards each time. “Oh really?” he purposely had their faces close to each other, until Minhee felt wall behind her. He made a move to kiss her, but she looked away, making his lips land on her cheek instead.

“We won’t last very long this way,” she pointed out. “The media will know and it’ll be more than a chaos it already is.”

“If I’m already married to you then they can’t say anything to spread us apart,” he suggested. “Rumours could only last for very long, and I’ll make sure that I’ll open everyone’s eyes to show how valuable you can be. They’ll accept you sooner or later, along with my family.”

“What a great plan,” she muttered under his hold.

“Please say yes and be my wife. I’m begging you, please!”

Minhee looked deep into his eyes to find hope and sincerity. She sighed softly and looked at her feet. “I’ll think about it.”

===

I hope this is as good as the previous one you requested if not better. :) I'd be glad to write more about Heechul and Minhee... Thanks for requesting!