JIMIN’S POV

She let me hold her for a long time. I eventually calmed down enough from our fight to fall back asleep with her in my arms.

When I woke up, she was staring down at me with a strange expression on her face. I yawned and her gaze snapped to mine.

“Are you okay?” I asked, my voice rough from sleep.

She carded her fingers through my hair and lingeringly kissed my forehead. I stayed as still as a statue underneath her, trying not to move and scare her off.

“I’ve been thinking.” She began quietly.

“About what?”

“About you.”

I swallowed nervously. “What about me?”

“You’re a tender blossom.” She said musingly. I groaned internally.

“Not this again.”

“But you are.” She continued. “And I think…I think I believe you.”

I laid my head on her chest and pulled her tighter to me. She didn’t fight me on it.

“I don’t think the Jimin that I know would cheat on me. Especially with her. I know what your past experiences with her have been like and I wouldn’t expect you to want to repeat them. And I don’t think you’re leading this secret double life.” She added softly. “Which is somehow harder to wrap my mind around than you kissing someone else.”

I nodded against her chest and waited for her to continue. I knew she had more to say.

“It’s like I can’t ever forget that you’re a celebrity. I’ve got a fear that one day I’m going to go out shopping and see your face plastered across magazines with the headline: PARK JIMIN, SPOTTED IN RED LIGHT DISTRICT. It could be the Rain and Se7en scandal all over again.  Or like Ben Affleck cheating on Jennifer Garner with the nanny. It doesn’t matter how gorgeous I am or how talented or anything. You can so easily cheat on me because you have such easy access to it. I trust you, I do, don’t sigh like that, but when I saw you in the bathroom with her, in that position, it was like my reality fell apart and my worst fear came true.” She paused for a moment. “I felt like I had woken up in a nightmare.”

“I would never do that to you.” I whispered, gently kissing her collarbones. “I promise.”

“That’s what anyone would say to their partner.” She whispered back, nuzzling her nose in my hair. “That’s why it was so hard to trust you. I don’t get why you don’t understand that.”

“I thought you would believe me and I felt betrayed when you wouldn’t even listen.” I confided.

She stayed silent for a minute. “I get that, but do you understand it from my point of view at all?”

“Yes, but I didn’t cheat on you.” I said impatiently.

“Yeah, but I wasn’t aware of that!”

“Well, if you had just listened!” I let go of her and sat up, meeting her eyes with a glare.

“Jimin! Stop being stubborn!”

“You stop being stubborn!”

“I was trying to tell you that I believe you and we’re fighting again.” She sighed, running a hand through her hair. “So frustrating.”

“You started it.” I said mulishly.

“How did I start it?” She crossed her arms in a huff.

“I always have to see from your side but you never see it from mine! I was like ually harassed or assaulted and all you do is care about yourself!” I cried.

She bit her lip, clearly taken aback.

“You think it was just hard for you, but I was about to lose my family because someone forced herself on me.” I continued in a calmer tone. “You’re always so concerned with protecting yourself that it’s like all concern for me goes to the wayside. You’re selfish. I understand it was a moment of passion, but after two days, don’t you think you would have been able to talk to me?”

“We’re not arguing about groceries, Jimin! I thought you were cheating on me! Of course it would take more than a couple of days for me to calm down and process everything.”

“I understand why you were upset.” I wrapped her up in my arms and kissed her neck. She flinched a little, which hurt me. “But I feel like our bond is so tenuous when we’re fighting. It feels like you could leave me at any minute to protect yourself.”

“I don’t want to be trapped in a bad marriage.” She whispered, tears springing into her eyes. “I don’t want to be tricked by you, Jimin, not when I love you so much.”

“We will never work if you’re always trying to protect yourself. You need to trust me. We can protect each other.” I looked into her eyes and saw a rare expression of vulnerability. “I am with you, not just through the wonderful times we have. When we’re good, we are really, really good and I could never be happier. But when we fight, I still feel like we’re both trying to protect ourselves. It’s not healthy and we’ll never make it like that. I need to know that you have my back and you need to know that I have yours. Trust me. I’m really the Jimin that you’ve known all these years.”

She simply let a soft sigh escape her lips. I held her tighter, pinning her body to me in an attempt to keep her heart close to me.

“I love you. I really do.” I murmured against her cheek. “Do you believe me?”

“I want to.” She pressed her palm flat against my cheek, fingers curving into my hair. “I really, really want to.”

“You said you did.” I mumbled, crestfallen. I started into her dark brown eyes for a long moment. “You said you believed me.”

“It’s hard.” She said quietly, seriously. “It is hard to choose to believe you when so many men have lied to so many women.”

“I’m not those men.” I told her, reaching out a hand to play with one of her curls. I tucked it behind her ear and kissed her fading freckles.

“You have always been too good to be true.” She said, a wistful expression on her face. “You’ve always been different. I think I’ve just been waiting for you to do something so…expected that it’s still a surprise when you always prove me wrong.”

“I knew you’ve always been waiting for me to up.” I drew a deep breath in through my nose and turned away, arms crossed over my bare chest. “I was right, all those years ago. You’ve always been waiting for me not to be perfect.”

“You’re far from perfect.” She pointed out, not unkindly. “It’s not like you’ve never done stupid before. It’s just always been very normal, very forgivable . Just common relationship things, you know? I think I’m scared because I can’t read your thoughts. I can’t know for sure if you’re telling the truth or what you really think about me or if you fantasize about being with other women. If you really are tired of me and if you do really want this baby since your solo career is going to start. You’re so good with everything! You care about me and you’re super romantic and an excellent cook and you actually do co-parent. I’m not stuck doing all the cooking and cleaning and childcare, but I feel like we’re actually partners. We can talk about things and we fight, but it’s generally okay. I expect a lot of you, but you’re also way too good to be true. All my friends are jealous that my husband is hot and sweet and a good father. I went into this marriage hoping for these things, but not expecting them, because I know what life is like and I know what men are like, but you have been so wonderful. But I expected fidelity in marriage. That wasn’t a hope, it was a promise. And this whole thing,” she gestured between the two of us, “has been more of a blow than, say, you expecting me to cook all the meals and clean all the dishes and raise the babies alone. Cheating on me is worse than any of that because I would never expect it from you. Frankly, I wouldn’t expect any of it from you, but I understand day-to-day life and how things happen like that. But cheating? I would never expect you to cheat on me. Not after all we’ve been through.”

She shifted her weight so she faced me. I stared at her, lost in thought.

“I love you, Jimin.” She whispered, taking my face in her hands. “So much. More than you realize, I think.”

I leaned my cheek against her palm, still staring into those beautiful brown eyes, so dark and deep. I’d fallen in love with her eyes.

“You’re always so demonstrative with your love that I don’t think I ever doubted you, truly and sincerely doubted you, until I witnessed that. I’ve been thinking, while you’ve been sleeping, about our relationship. These past years, especially since we’ve been married, you have made me feel so happy and so, so loved. I don’t want that to end.”

“It won’t end.” I murmured, taking her and pulling her close.

I held her for a little while longer before I heard Haru stir.

“I’ll get her.” My wife volunteered. She moved to go, but I grabbed her wrist and pulled her back to me.

“Don’t leave.” I whispered. “Hmm? She’ll come in here. I told her it was okay last night.”

“Ah…okay.” She hesitated, but I dragged her body back down to lay next to mine. I slipped a leg in between hers and crooked it at the knee, holding her to me.

She yawned as I pressed my lips against her shoulder, the soft fabric of her shirt clinging to my lips. She lifted her left hand and placed it in my hair. My heart dropped to feel the ness of her ring finger. I’d almost forgotten she’d given me back her wedding rings, but there they were, lying against my chest, pricking me every so often.

The door swung open with a crash and revealed a very angry Haru, hands rubbing at her eyes and feet stomping as she threw a full-fledged tantrum in our doorway.

“DADDY! Why did not you answer me?” She hissed, projecting herself onto the floor, wildly flailing her limbs.

I pecked my wife’s nose before jumping out of bed and crouching down in front of Haru.

“Well, if this isn’t a lovely way to say good morning, I don’t know what is.” I ruffled her hair and she smacked me.

“Haru! How dare you hit your father!” My wife cried indignantly.

Haru’s head instantly shot up and her cries quieted at the sound of her mother’s voice.

“Mama?” She asked softly, eyes widening as they landed on her mom’s figure quickly approaching. She jumped up and flew into her arms. “Mama! Mama, you here! You here!”

“Yes, I’m here.” My wife buried her nose in Haru’s curls, instantly softening. We were going to spoil our daughter; I could already tell.

“I love you, I love you, I love you.” Haru breathed excitedly, patting her mom’s face.

“I love you, too, Haru.” My wife whispered, squeezing Haru tightly. “Were you good for Daddy?”

“No.” Haru giggled delightedly. “I was bad.”

“Haru! That’s not something to be proud of!” She scolded. She breathed in Haru’s scent, then wrinkled her nose. “Did you take a bath last night?”

“I didn’t!” Haru squealed, clapping her hands excitedly. “Daddy said he was, um…” She thought for a long moment, “too tired to deal wif me!”

“You’re a bad seed.” I muttered, tugging on one of her curls. “Being mean to your poor daddy like that.”

Haru just laughed in my face. I glanced up to see my wife trying to hide her smirk and utterly failing.

“Bad seed, bad seed.” Haru chanted, standing up and twirling around in a little circle. I looped my arm around her waist and pulled her into my lap, tickling under her chin until she shrieked.

“Don’, don’!” She panted in between giggles. “Don’ tickle me.”

“Tickle you?” I asked, lifting up her arm and digging my fingers into the most ticklish spot of all: her armpit.

“No!” She screeched. “Don’ tickle me!”

I relented for a little while and let her catch her breath. She grinned up at me and grabbed my wrists.

“Tickle me.” Haru demanded with a laugh.

“Nah, I’m done.” I held up my hands and mirrored the small pout that appeared on her face.

She reached up and smacked me across the face, a serious, concentrated look on her face the entire time.

I yanked her up and bent my head so we were eye-to-eye. “You do not hit.” I said in a low voice. “Go sit in timeout.”

“Noooooo.” She whined, lower lip trembling. “Noooo, Daddy, nooooo!”

“Yes.” I set her on her feet and pushed her towards the doorway. “Go.”

She appealed to her mother with a pathetic look. “You better get your behind in the timeout chair before I come over there and put you in it.” She threatened. Haru immediately scampered away, obviously more afraid of her mother than me.

My wife heaved a deep sigh as Haru disappeared into her room, sobbing loudly.

“She’s so bad.” She said, dejectedly falling onto the ground, flat on her back. “We’re raising a little monster.”

“She’s three.” I said soothingly. “All three year olds are like this. You know that.”

“Yeah, but I don’t want my three year old to be like this.” She moaned, rolling around on the carpet.

“Well, maybe our next baby will be better.” I scooted closer and placed a hand on her stomach. She watched me through half-lowered lids. I hesitated before tugging at the hem of her shirt. “Do you…do you mind if I…?” I trailed off, looking at her hopefully. She hesitated before nodding once, twice.

I lifted her shirt to reveal her stomach. I laid down on the ground and rested my head against her stomach, cheek pressed to her skin.

“Hi.” I whispered to the baby inside. “I missed you, darling. Have you had a good couple of days? Did Mama eat good food at Uncle Jin’s? Were you happy there?” I nuzzled my nose against her stomach, soft kisses leaving a trail. “I missed you so, so, so much.”

A quiet sob broke out from my wife. I looked over in surprise to see her suddenly sitting up, tears falling from her eyes. I sat up and opened my mouth to ask if she was okay, but before I could, she catapulted herself into my lap and threw her arms around me, burying her face in my chest, deep, heart-wrenching sobs wracking her body.

“Wh-What?” I stared down at her brown curls, the only part of her I could see clearly, in bewilderment. “Why are you…?”

“Don’t,” she interrupted herself with a hiccupping cry, “don’t leave me, Jimin. Please, please. Don’t leave me. I don’t want to live without you.”

I felt myself melting, my body molding to hers as I patted her back and her hair. “I’m not going anywhere. I promise.”

“I need you, I need you.” She whispered fiercely into my chest, tears wet against my skin. “Don’t let me down.”

“I won’t. Oh, I won’t. I swear.” I scattered kisses among her curls. “I love you so much. I love you, love you.”

We clung to each other, kissing each other in places that didn’t mean as much as the one kiss I truly craved. I wished she would press her lips against mine and seal her forgiveness, but she didn’t, instead settling for kisses against my chest.

Finally, finally, she looked up at me, brown eyes bright and red from crying. We stared at each other for what felt like forever; I lost all sense of time as I realized slowly that I wasn’t going to lose her, that we weren’t falling apart. She moved, swiftly and suddenly, and met my lips in a gentle, loving kiss. I threaded my fingers through her hair, tugging her closer, closer until we both couldn’t breathe.

We parted, panting and I felt like we were still kissing, still locked together in that moment.

“Am I fo’given yet?!” Haru shouted from her room.

I half-laughed as I stared into my wife’s eyes. “Well? Are we?”

“Yes!” My wife shouted back. “You’re forgiven.” She kissed me quickly, a little sneak of a kiss. “Yes, you’re forgiven.”

I grinned broadly and kissed her, one small kiss after another until Haru came bounding into the room.

“No tisses.” She said firmly, hands on her little lips. My wife grabbed her wrist and pulled her to us, and the two of us smothered her face in kisses until she fairly screamed with laughter.

“Yes, kisses.” My wife whispered. “Always kisses.”

I smiled at her from over Haru’s head and my heart beat with hope to see her eyes shining with laughter instead of tears.

“I love you.” I whispered to her.

“I know.” She whispered back. “I love you, too.”