Jimin woke me up one morning with a solo performance in our bedroom.

“What the are you doing?” I rolled over and squinted at him. He winked and continued his shirtless rendition of Taeyang’s Eyes, Nose, Lips.

I watched as he sensually danced and sang his way over to me. As the object of his affections, I’d been gifted with many such performances. One of the greatest things about watching Jimin dance and sing in private was the way he burst into giggles at the end.

“How are you twenty-six? Your giggle makes you sound like you’re twelve.” I murmured sleepily into my pillow. Jimin pouted and turned up his iness by throwing in a few body rolls.

“What are you doing to me?” I demanded angrily. “I don’t want to feel ually frustrated in the morning! I have to go to work in an hour!”

The biggest smile spread over Jimin’s face. “You can be a little late, can’t you?” He shimmied closer to me and stretched his leg against the headboard, showing off his flexibility and shoving his thick thigh right in front of my face.

I hesitated noticeably.

“Hmm?” He pressed, trailing a thick finger across my cheek. “Just a little late?”

“Yeah. I can be a little late.” I agreed, pulling his arm so he fell on top of me.

“Why don’t you just take today off?” Jimin asked in a seductive voice, pressing kisses down my neck.

“That’s so irresponsible. We’re not newlyweds.”

“We have to take advantage of our virility while we can.”

“That’s a male thing.” I whispered, pulling off my nightshirt. “Women are ready to have at any time of life. It’s men who have a hard time getting into it when they’re older.”

Jimin chuckled as he kissed down my arms. “You gonna leave me for a young guy when we’re old?”

I pretended to think about it for a moment. Jimin’s head shot up in concern.

“You better not!” He insisted, swiping his tongue over his pouty lips. “You brat!”

“I don’t know.” I said slowly. I ran my hands across his biceps. “I’ve gotten used to sleeping with strong young men. Maybe I’ll just have to be with young men my whole life.”

“You’re a ing creep.” Jimin buried his face in the crook of my neck. “But I love you, anyway.”

“Gee, thanks.” I muttered sarcastically. “This coming from the man who likes to get freaky in public places.”

“You’re just too desirable.” He nipped at my neck.

“Daddy! I need you!” Haru shrieked from her bedroom. Jimin visibly deflated and rolled off of me and onto the floor.

“We’ll never have another baby like this.” He said into the carpet. His voice was muffled, but I could still make out the despair in his tone.

“She can hang out for a bit. Yukon’s in there with her and she’s fine.” I climbed off the bed and laid down next to him. He turned his head and smiled at me.

“I love your eyes.” He whispered. “And your nose.” He leaned in and kissed it. “And your lips.”

I moved and met his lips with mine.

We made out for a little while, hands and mouths roaming around each other’s bodies. In the distance, I could vaguely hear Haru playing with Yukon in her room.

Jimin rolled over on top of me. “We gotta make this quick, baby. Work and our darling daughter cannot spare us, not even for love.”

I let out a soft chuckle and looked up at him through lowered lids. “I don’t care. Just don’t leave me hanging.”

He didn’t.

“Mama, I love you.” Haru said sweetly as Jimin and I walked her to daycare. It was down the street from our apartment.

“I love you, too, Haru.” I smiled, my heart melting.

“We’re here, little love.” Jimin knelt down in front of Haru and straightened the buttons on her coat. “Be good, okay? I don’t want to hear that you were fighting with Mina again.”

“I don’ like her.” Haru said stubbornly.

“You don’t have to like her. You just have to be nice to her.” Jimin kissed her forehead. “I love you.”

“Love you, too, Daddy.” Haru pecked his cheek.

I smoothed her hair back and kissed her cheek. “Have a great day, Haru. Daddy will pick you up after work, okay? Mama will be home a little later.”

“Otay.” Haru smiled at me. Jimin led her inside and the door clanged shut behind them.

I stood on the sidewalk and pressed a hand to my stomach. Would it ever again be round with a burgeoning life?

Jimin rejoined me with a smile on his face. He took my hand and interlaced our fingers.

“I had a dream you were pregnant last night.” He confided softly.

“What a nice dream.” I patted my stomach morosely. “I’m afraid that it won’t come true.”

“Don’t worry, baby. Everything will work out.” He pecked my cheek before we descended the staircase into the subway.

Jimin and I usually rode the subway to work together on the days we worked the same hours. Our buildings were close to each other, so he would drop me off before making his way to Big Hit. I liked subway rides with Jimin. It was cold and miserable in the winter, but we held hands and he let me sleep on his shoulder sometimes.

“Baby, we’re here.” Jimin lightly my hair to wake me up. I stirred and blinked at him. He smiled and kissed my forehead. “Time for work, sleepyhead.”

He helped me up and led me through the crowded station up to the street. I yawned as Jimin steered me towards work, making sure that he was closest to the cars. He liked to do these little protective things and I let him. I didn’t mind if my husband protected me from possible dangers. I thought it was sweet, even if I was perfectly capable of avoiding cars on my own.

It was nice that Jimin still cared after all these years. Five and a half years didn’t seem like a lot, but I had watched him mature from my sweet, infatuated summer “boy toy” to my gentle, caring husband. He’d become a steady, reliable person that absolutely adored his family.

We didn’t fight half as much as we used to. Although we still had the occasional disagreement, Jimin and I finally trusted each other. We didn’t lash out at each other because of our insecurities; I wasn’t sure if this was because we became parents or because we worked on our relationship, but when Haru was born, the dynamics of our relationship changed. We didn’t have the luxury to fight over which movie to watch that night or if my dress was too short. We barely had the luxury to sleep, much less sleep together.

Haru’s early days were when we really relied on each other. Neither of us really knew what to do with a baby, but we knew how to help each other out. The number of times I sighed and Jimin instantly appeared at my side with a blanket or a glass of water were countless. I could tell just by the stoop of his shoulders that Haru’s incessant cries were overwhelming, so I took a turn and shooed him out of the nursery.

At the end of the night, we typically collapsed into bed without even speaking. It was the first time in our relationship that Jimin didn’t at least whisper a “Good night, baby” to me. No kisses or snuggles. As soon as his head touched the pillow, he fell fast asleep.

I would lay awake wondering what our first year of marriage would have been like if we hadn’t had a baby. I didn’t regret having Haru, not at all, but I missed having Jimin all to myself.

I remembered one night we had a particularly rough time putting Haru to sleep (she was a difficult baby) and Jimin had brushed past me into our bedroom. He fell asleep instantly and I sat down on the floor next to him and played with his hair. I started to cry and then I just couldn’t stop. I woke Jimin up with my obnoxious sobbing.

“What’s wrong?” He asked groggily. “Is Haru okay?”

I nodded tearfully. Jimin sat up and rubbed his face into his hands, looking very confused and grumpy.

“What’s the matter?”

“It’s nothing. Just go back to sleep.” I whispered, turning my face away from him.

He sighed and climbed out of bed to sit next to me. “It’s not nothing if you’re crying.”

“I’m hormonal.” I insisted. Jimin laid his head on my shoulder.

“Just tell me what’s wrong, baby. You can talk to me. I’m your husband.”

I broke out into fresh sobs. Jimin wrapped his arms around me and let me cry it out.

“What’s wrong?” He asked again. “Hmm? Why you crying?”

“I miss you.” I admitted, burrowing my face into his hoodie. “I feel like I haven’t talked to you in six weeks.”

Jimin stayed quiet for a while.

“I can’t even remember the last time we kissed.” I added softly. “We’ve been married for only ten months, but you don’t feel like my husband anymore. You just feel like the father of my child.”

Jimin still didn’t say anything, but he held me tighter. I closed my eyes and felt myself drifting off into sleep. After a while, he gently picked me up and laid me out on the bed. Fresh tears fell down my face as he pulled the blanket over us and snuggled up next to me. I felt a soft kiss on my shoulder before his strong arms wrapped around me.

“I love you.” Jimin whispered.

I turned over to face him. His eyes were already half-shut in sleep, but I coaxed a gentle kiss from his lips.

“I love you.” I whispered back.

Jimin’s sharp tug on my hand pulled me back to the present.

“What are you daydreaming about? You’ve got to get to work.” He grinned at me, a bright, lovely smile.

I threw my arms around him and kissed him in broad daylight. He stumbled backwards, surprised.

“What the hell?”

“I love you so much.” I whispered. “Have a great day.”

“I love you, too.” Jimin replied, bewildered. “I’ll see you at home.”

I gave him one last kiss before walking into my building. As I was on my way into the office, I stole one last glance. Jimin was watching me with a shy look in his eyes.

“Always.” He mouthed to me.

“Always.” I smiled back.