Saturday, March 21, 2015

Baekhyun wakes up with a gasp and blinks quickly to see if he's still dreaming, while trying to forget what he had. There are stray tears in his eyes and he can feel the dry trails on his cheeks. He hasn't had dreams like this that caused him to cry since he was a little boy.

He's not wearing the gray Supreme hoodie that Chanyeol bought him for their two months. He's not wearing the tight black jeans that Chanyeol either appreciates or whines about because it shows just how good Baekhyun's is or it's getting attention from other unworthy eyes. He doesn't have eyeliner on and his hair isn't styled up like it was in his dream. As if to confirm his observations, Baekhyun walks over to his sleeping boyfriend and with his fingers crossed in hopes that his giant won't wake up, Baekhyun pulls the blanket off the tall figure and scans. Scans and scans until he's too relieved to be quiet anymore. He falls to his knees and starts crying, crying and not giving a if his boyfriend wakes up in this ungodly hour to find Baekhyun in this mess.

Baekhyun doesn't know that his boyfriend had been awake since the older male had searched the bed for his phone, remaining quiet to give Baekhyun his personal space albeit still sleepy as he watched through lidded eyes and listened to his small boyfriend. He was fully woken up by the sudden cold attack of his blanket being brushed off his body and was more fully aware once he heard the first sob come out of Baekhyun's lips. Scared and worried, the giant scrambles out of bed and kneels down beside the crying Baekhyun and hugs him. Chanyeol hugs tighter with every sob and finally sits back on the side of his bed, pulling Baekhyun with him and placing him on his lap. Baekhyun continues to cry but he does wrap his legs around Chanyeol's body and hugs Chanyeol back. It's tight like as if Baekhyun's holding for dear life and Chanyeol doesn't know what to do but rock back and forth while running his hand up and down Baekhyun's head and neck, shushing him and telling him it'll be okay.

He hasn't seen Baekhyun like this since they were little boys having nightmares and being too scared to tough it out alone.

Baekhyun's so relieved. He clings to Chanyeol and tries to calm himself down, listening to Chanyeol's soothing deep voice. Baekhyun feels a second surge of relief when Baekhyun hears Chanyeol say everything will be okay and Baekhyun suddenly straightens from the cuddle and places one hand on each of Chanyeol's cheeks and kisses him. He kisses him short and desperate because he knows Chanyeol's there, with him.

Chanyeol doesn't have any sign of red lipstick on his plump lips. He's not wearing the black long sleeve he wore to the party. He's not wearing those washed out and ripped light blue jeans that Baekhyun teases him about because his bowed knees always poke out. His hair isn't styled up with gel and he doesn't smell of Baekhyun's favorite cologne on him. Instead Chanyeol had a smudge of dry toothpaste on the side of his lips. He's wearing baggy sweats and his favorite shirt, the one with rilakkumas that Baekhyun had bought. Chanyeol doesn't have styled hair but black strands standing up and bangs all crazy looking. He definitely doesn't smell like cologne but Baekhyun's favorite smells of Chanyeol's body wash and shampoo.

Breaking the kiss, Baekhyun lingers in close to Chanyeol, his hair brushing the forehead of the one he's straddling. He can hear Chanyeol's breathing and knows he surprised the other with the urgent kiss. He then leans into Chanyeol's embrace and begins to speak, Chanyeol rubbing his thumb on Baekhyun's neck, a habit of the giant that effectively calms Baekhyun down while showing others who owned who.

"Chanyeol," Baekhyun whispers. "Did I wake you? I'm sorry if I did," he kisses the younger's neck.

"Hmm? No, it's fine Baek. You're more important," Chanyeol hums. He moves and carries Baekhyun up to his bed, the smaller male still clinging to him like a koala and Chanyeol's torn between being ecstatic that he's holding on to his boyfriends this early in the morning or more worried that he's actually thinking of that right now. He settles for brushing the thought away and pecks Baekhyun's cheek.

"Do you want to tell me what's wrong or should I wait until you're ready?" Chanyeol asks as he lays them back down on the bed, cushioning Baekhyun's head with his arm and wrapping them in the warm blanket. As if remembering how it was then, Chanyeol waits by asking Baekhyun if he wanted to tell him. It was always like that, especially with Baekhyun. When they were kids and had nightmares, Chanyeol never thought to hesitate with crying to and telling Baekhyun about his fears. He just knew Baekhyun wouldn't judge him. But with Baekhyun, it was a process because being the older of the two, he had to be the tougher one. Chanyeol knows that Baekhyun doesn't want to show him he's fearful. He wants to show Chanyeol that he's fearless.

Chanyeol is surprised when he doesn't have to wait that long when he hears Baekhyun utter the first words.

"Yeol, it was so bad," Baekhyun whispers, with a sign of a sob being held back. Chanyeol starts to hug Baekhyun tighter but Baekhyun tells him it's fine, he's fine, and starts telling him about the nightmare.

He tells Chanyeol of how they'd been at another one of Kris' party, how they'd both been drunk, how Haylee had magically come up and kissed Chanyeol in front of Baekhyun, how Baekhyun had splashed her with their cups of alcohol, how he'd been so embarrassed and ashamed and ran out with Chanyeol running after him, how they yelled and yelled and how it all went wrong. Chanyeol doesn't interrupt and continues to give Baekhyun his full attention, the other getting conscious about how Chanyeol may react.

Baekhyun decides not to hide anything and finally admits as to why they eventually broke up in his dream. How Baekhyun had called Chanyeol blind and oblivious to everything and too hopeful for things. He tells Chanyeol of how the giant had been right in his dream to yell that Baekhyun wasn't being upfront about his feelings and expected him to know everything despite how stressful their lives were being and was even more or equally as wrong as Chanyeol. Baekhyun apologizes for how he felt about being insecure and jealous over Haylee when he knows that Chanyeol would never let those things happen. He finally tells Chanyeol how he's been feeling for the past two months, and this time not at a party where they were drunk and stupid. When he's finally done with explaining, all Baekhyun can do is lie there in Chanyeol's arms, shy and ashamed, worried about Chanyeol's reaction. Hes just about close to crying again but his worries fade away when Chanyeol tilts his head up just like he does when he kisses him, but instead of a kiss, he looks straight into Baekhyun's eyes and places his hand over the other's mouth.

"You have to agree not to say anything while I'm talking. I didn't when you were," Chanyeol says. "Nod your head if you agree." Baekhyun nods and Chanyeol eases his hand from his boyfriend's mouth. Curious, Baekhyun waits for Chanyeol to start talking. Chanyeol has that look where he's being serious and running words throug his head.

"First off, just so you know I would never punch a stop sign's post, that'd just hurt and I need my hand for basketball...and holding yours," Chanyeol teases and smiles when Baekhyun chuckles. Things are getting better. Boyfriend points for Chanyeol. "Second," Chanyeol becomes serious again and looks straight in Baekhyun's eyes.

"I swear, I promise that I would never in a billion years feel that Haylee or anyone is so much better than you. You know me and I know you better than anyone else in this whole damn ing world and how stupid could I possibly be if I let that go for someone I know isn't as important as you? Pretty ing stupid that's what," Chanyeol says determinedly. "I'm sorry that I made you feel insecure or jealous because I spent too much time with her-"

"Aw, come on. Yeo-" Baekhyun interrupts.

"Hey you promised not to interrupt," Chanyeol pouts, causing Baekhyun to laugh and kiss it away. Things were definitely getting better and all thoughts of the nightmare slipping away. Baekhyun seriously loves how Chanyeol can make him forget all his .

"Okay go on," Baekhyun yawns, scratching his stomach for Chanyeol to see.

Chanyeol shakes his head at the sight and snorts. "Ew. Anyways, you're right that I'm too hopeful and kind and that I really can be blind sometimes. I'm sorry that I didn't see that but I swear I'll tone it down and actually decline her offers. I know shes actually a geeat sctress anyways. Plus with our lives getting stressful these next few months with college stuff and all, I need as much Baekhyun as I could possibly need. And I need LOTS. Maybe I am too nice and honestly I think that comes from you," Chanyeol teases.

"Lastly, I ing love you and that beats all odds. And now I'm embarassed because I really wanted to save those three words for some other time so when we wake up later let's pretend I didn't say it yet. Now let's go back to sleep or we'll look like zombies on a Saturday morning and I don't want to miss out on your mom's french toast."

Baekhyun watches Chanyeol get all flustered, but he's flustered himself after hearing the giant's confession. Love? He's heard Chanyeol tell him that all the time over the smallest things like him helping with homework or making him food or hanging out. But somehow hearing Chanyeol say it now meant so much more. He chuckles at how Chanyeol had been wanting to save those three words and agrees with his boyfriend, sealing it with a kiss on the cheek and an 'Okay, I promise.'

The two quietly fall asleep in each other's arms, listening to their soft breathing, while Baekhyun traces little hearts on Chanyeol's chest and Chanyeol places his cheek on Baekhyun's head. Just as Baekhyun was about on the brink of unconsciousness, he hears Chanyeol softly whisper to him and smiles.

"I really really like you Byun Baekhyun. Don't you forget that."