Ji Hyun’s POV

PLINK.

Do you hear that? Listen harder. Yep. I am telling you to listen harder. Because I want you to hear that. It’s my heart. And it’s breaking every waking minute that I’m here.

I want to go back home. I want to leave this hell hole. I want to forget about him. I want to forget about everything we went through and everything that he said. Because it’s destroying me. It’s destroying every single wall that I built over the years.

I used to think that the only thing I was capable of loving was my family and its principles. Now I know I was so wrong. I want to go back in time and slap some sense into my immature and impulsive self. Back to when I first decided to come here.

To stop myself from ever coming up with this stupid and impulse driven idea. But even if I did. Would I be able to feel as happy as I do now? Would I be able to feel this much satisfaction with the mere sight of him? Maybe I won’t. But I guess that would be better than having to lie to him every day. Knowing to myself that we will never be. That if we ever ended up together it would only end up in chaos.

I have been locked up in my room for the remainder of the day. Not even daring to take a single step out. My phone was ringing constantly but I ignored it. What was the point of answering the damn thing if I knew the only one trying to get through was him?

“I truly like you. And I care for you a lot. No matter what. Okay? I just want to be sure that one day you’ll see my feelings for you.”

His words were still ringing in my ears. Just like he was right next to me. Just like he just said it right in front of me. Every syllable uttered didn’t give me the joy that most people should feel when the guy they like finally confessed to them.

No. What I feel is far from that. I feel hurt. Hurt knowing that I’m lying to him. Hurt knowing that I will break his heart. Hurt knowing that between us. He was the only one who was honest and true.

I grabbed my pillow tighter and let everything I was holding in crumble into how hard I was gripping onto the pillow. I closed my eyes shut feeling the pressure I exerted crease itself onto my face. I let the tears fall as they pleased since this was the only form of solace that I was going to get. Because I didn’t want to hurt him. Not even a little bit.

I enjoyed the silent peace that prevailed over my room. But quickly felt like killing the person behind my door when they so rudely decided to bang extremely hard on my door.

I ignored it and turned to the other side of my bed to buffer out whoever was banging on my door so loudly only to find myself groaning in frustration at their persistence.

“Open the damn ing door Ji Hyun-ah! I know you’re in there!” I knew that voice anywhere. And sadly. As much joy as I felt whenever I hear it right now it was only causing my heart to clench even more into my chest.

“Go away.” I whispered mostly to myself and my pillow. I knew he couldn’t hear me. But at least I could say something that I actually wanted to say.

“Open the door Ji Hyun. Please. I just want to see you. I’m sorry if I scared you yesterday. Please just let me in.” His voice came a lot weaker than the first time. And I knew he was begging but I refused to answer the door.

As much as I wanted to see him and tell him that I reciprocated the feelings he had for me I just couldn’t. I needed to restrain myself. I was here for a purpose. I was here for my family. Not to meet him or to find love.

“Ji Hyun-ah. Just give me today. After today I won’t bother you anymore. Just give me this last chance.” I heard him say and it was clear that he was already out of hope with every word uttered. I sighed and stood up from my bed. Going over to unlock the door and let him in.

When I finally opened it he looked relieved but saddened but my decision. I guess the appearance right now is no way to greet someone. I was about to turn away and close the door again when he grabbed my arm and pulled me into a hug. I froze against his touch since it sent shivers run through me.

When he let me go he kept me at arm’s length taking in my appearance before smiling and uttering his thanks for letting him in. I returned the smile he gave me but only very weakly.

I was still so ed up inside seeing him right in front of me.

Just like he knew what was going on in me he quickly guided me out of my room and into my kitchen. There set up was some food. I took my seat across from him and he took his right after checking that I was doing okay.

It was awkward at first especially now that I didn’t talk back or do anything that would be considered normal for me. And he sensed that immediately. He just sighed and took my hand gently before speaking.

“Ji Hyun-ah. Whatever is bothering you. Let it go just for now. Let’s be selfish right now. Arasso?” He said and it only made me look up at him with worried eyes. And to think about what he just suggested.

“Let’s be selfish right now.”

That small sentence rang in my ears and it sent a wave of ease through my body. I nodded at him and smiled. Not weakly or forced. But something more genuine and he seemed pleased with my response.

“There. That’s the girl I am slowly starting to fall for. Now hurry up. Because we have a long day ahead of us.” He said and we quickly dug in to the meal in front of us.

Lu Han’s POV

She was acting weird today. She wasn’t as talkative or as lively as before. It was clear with the way that she furrowed her eyebrows and scrunched her nose that something was probably hanging above her head.

That was what pushed me to ask her to be selfish today. Because that was what I was going to do. I was going to be selfish. No matter what happens or what people were going to say after. I intended to get her final answer today. And I will stop at nothing to make sure that it was a yes.

We were walking along downtown. Mindlessly going anywhere. Don’t think that I didn’t have anything planned today. I just needed to see where we would go. Where we would end up. Because somehow even if I was so sure as hell about her. I still needed some sign from the universe.

And I probably got it. We managed to end up in the first place that we formally buried the hatchet. The place where my emotions started to ignite for her. It was weird how we managed to end up at this bench. But we did. And I think this is starting to be a good sign.

I looked at her and she was staring at the bench. Probably remembering the time we spent here. I was staring at her face when she suddenly turned towards me and flashed a weak but genuine smile.

“So this was where it started huh? When we started to have feelings for each other?” She asked and I stared at her dumbstruck. She has feelings for me on this day as well?

“Y-You started having feelings for me on that say as well?” I asked her stunned by the new revelation. She nodded and chuckled at my question.

“Well yea. As I’ve told you that day. You were there. And that is all that matters to me.” She told me and turned away from me to sit on the bench. I followed suit after her thinking about what she just said.

So what she said that time wasn’t just something literal. But I guess it went deeper. Because I was there. Because somehow through the course of our gett