Jae’s POV

I was out the doors before anyone could object. My insides were turning around, the tears b at my already-blurred eyes. I tore my sweatshirt off, stuffing it in my bag as I ran, needing something to occupy my mind, but I was at my house way too soon, bending over, coughing and wiping at my watery eyes. Dad..

Dad. I hiccupped and choked on a sob, and pushed the front door open.

Curled up on the couch was Mom. She was weeping and sobbing into a pillow, and my heart broke seventy times at that. I dropped my bag and hurried to her, wanting to be comforted. I could tell she was the one the needed the comforting the most though. Right now my heart was shrouded in devastation.

I bit my lip, drawing my arms around her balled-up figure, wanting so much to be the one being comforted.

Gently, I rocked her a bit, murmuring reassuring phrases. “Shh. Breathe.” There was no way I was telling her it was ‘OK’ when it obviously wasn’t. Mom took shaking breaths, staring at me like I was some mutant, because usually the daughter isn’t the one comforting the parent. “You’ll be just fine. Just fine.” I whispered, my heart breaking again.

Suddenly, I fell back, and Mom was standing, looking angry. “No! I won’t be fine!” She raised her voice.

I had never, ever, heard her raise her voice. “How can you say it’s fine?!” Mom choked on a sob. “He was my world.” She sank to her knees. “He was my everything…”

I slowly stood up, realizing how much this death hurt her.

“And.. and…” My eyes widened, feeling upset. “He died because of you. If you hadn’t skipped, he wouldn’t have gone to get you! He wouldn’t have died!” I stepped back as if I had been slapped, the tears pricking at my eyes again. I had never seen her like this. Her words stabbed like a sharp knife. I stood still. She was just upset… she’s just upset… she doesn’t mean it… I told myself. Then she gave me a look of pure venom. “What kind of daughter are you?! Get out! Get out now!” Her voice sounded ragged, desperate. Nevertheless, I felt my mind zero in on the fact I was being kicked out.

“Look, Mo-“

“Get out!” She screamed. I stumbled back, fumbling for the door handle, the tears streaming out as my heart contorted with distress. I found the doorknob, and yanked it open, ambling clumsily away to who knows where. All I know is that I ended up somewhere grassy, far away devoid of civilization.  I must have plundered along for more than a mile.

It better be.

I cried., wallowing like a crybaby in the grass.

Even the strongest one needs to cry.

At least I Was here, alone. The tears poured out, my heart ached and my insides were overly hot from my sadness. I breathed, my sobs coming to a shuddering stop.

The question dawned on me.

Where will I go? I got kicked out… I would have to talk to her sometime. I can just… just talk tomorrow. Not now…

My best friend gave me the best advice.

I chewed my lip… feeling absolutely horrible, and now I could be upset about my father’s death as well as my mother’s actions. Where was that music coming from?

He said each day’s a gift and not a given right.

I sniffed, wiping my face and looked around. Oh. There was a speaker on a pole over there. I guess it just plays music randomly. But still… where should I go for tonight?

Leave no stone unturned, leave your fears behind.

I struggled to stand up, making my crying session hurtfully short. I thought of how my mom lashed out at me. IT had been terrifying.

And try to take the path less traveled by.

I pondered. So, yeah, I’ll talk to her tomorrow. Everyone would wait for tomorrow. I couldn’t handle it today.

The first step you take is the longest stride.

I gulped, stopping my after-trembling, forcing myself to take deep breaths.

If today was your last day and tomorrow was too late.

“This is a good song.” I murmured, wiping my face on my sleeve. Since I left my other clothing at my house, I was only wearing y jeans and school uniform top.

Could you say goodbye to yesterday?

My throat felt dry, and I stared at the sky. What was this song saying?

Would you live each moment like your last?

Um, to live as if you’ll die tomorrow? I felt the wheels in my mind begin to turn.

Leave old pictures in the past? Donate every dime you had, if today was your last day?

I think I began to understand.

What if, what if, if today was your last day?

If today was your last day, you should do everything you can for the better of the world.

Then… it’s also saying you can’t wait until tomorrow for important things. My eyes widened. If you get in a fight with someone, you can’t wait until tomorrow to talk about it because they might be dead.

Against the grain should be a way of life.

What’s worth the price is always worth the fight.

Every second counts, ‘cause there’s no second try.

So live like you’re never living twice.

Don’t take the free ride in your own life.

IF you want to tell someone you love them, don’t wait until tomorrow to say it because they might be dead.

If today was your last day and tomorrow and was too late.

Could you say goodbye to yesterday?

I dusted off my pants. I had to talk to Mom now. Because you never know…

Would you live each moment like your last?

Leave old pictures in the past?

Donate every dime you had?

I turned around, and realized I knew the way back home.

And would you call those friends you never see?

Reminisce old memories?

Would you forgive your enemies?

I began to jog.

And would you find the one you’re dreaming of?

Swear up and down to God above

That you’d finally fall in love, if today was your last day.

Nothing but Mom was on my mind.

If today was your last day

Would you make your mark by mending a broken heart?

You know it’s never too late, to shoot for the stars

Regardless of who you are.

No matter who you are… live like you’d die tomorrow. This song… I went into a sprint. Mom… Mom…

So do whatever it takes.

‘Cause you can’t rewind a moment in this life.

Let nothing stand in your way

‘Cause the hands of time are never on your side.

I sped up, my hair coming loose of its tie. I don’t want Mom and me to be in a fight. I don’t want us to be apart now. Because what if?

What if?

If today was your last and tomorrow was too late.

Could you say goodbye to yesterday?

Would you live each moment like your last?

Leave old pictures in the past?

Donate every dime you had?

Oh god, whoever sang this just taught me the best lesson I’ve ever learned.

And would you called those friends you never see?

I saw my house.

Reminisce old memories?

A tear sprung loose. I was going to settle it now… I know she most likely needs to recover… I know, I know, but I need to fix this.

Would you forgive your enemies?

I jumped onto the steps leadingto the door.

And would you find that one you’re dreaming of?

“Mom?!”

Swear up and down to God above?

I threw the door open, and found her former place empty. “Mom? Mom?!”

That you’d finally fall in love, if today was your last day?

I checked every room, a still silence blanketing this place. Mom’s bedroom.

I put my hand on the doorknob, and pushed the door open.

It didn’t matter anymore.

Because...

today was her last day.