★ Sehun and reader || 675 words || Sehun's Birthday Dose (Pt 2)

This story was inspired by shinee's Symptoms. I guess this is my shortest one shot ever. Cool isn't it, I wrote this for Sehun's birthday and exo is coming back with Overdose, and also just right having the same concept as 'A Dose of Exo'. This story too, the more I wrote the less sense it made for me, because i just kept trying to match the plot with the song lyrics. Sorry if this . It is to show a darker side of fangirls.

>>OT15, behind story

Once again, I forced myself awake in the middle of the night. Lying in the dark alone, with my hand on my chest, and taking deep breaths through my mouth. I closed my eyes and tried to loosen my tensed body. I had no strength in my body, I couldn’t control it. It was a mystery, a strange sickness.

These bad symptoms appeared after I saw him. That man with skin as fair as milk, long and sharp chin. His cherry like lips, thin and straight nose, small but threatening eyes that challenges you to look at them. He had his hair dyed blonde, sleeked to the back, revealing his short and flat forehead. Despite that his face was still longer than mine. Towering over more than three quarter of the world, his chest would be where I fare beside him.

Still shivering underneath my blanket, I curled into a ball once I gained control of my body. There was nothing I could do as I lay there in pain.

I couldn’t forget his indifferent face, a face that I couldn’t quite get and took my breath away. His cold eyes that dug right into my heart, cutting deeply through the centre. His silence towards me, like a blade made of wind, slit my throat, I couldn’t even let out a sound.

If I don’t cure the wounds, I might die, I might go crazy, who knows what might happen. Yet there was no way I could cure them. The only treatment was miles away, and my medication wasn’t strong enough.

He was the sickness in me, and the cause of my injuries. The worse it got, the more exhausted I become, but he too was my medication.

I reached out for my phone on the bedside table, and quickly unlocked my phone. His picture flashed in front of my eyes and I started to feel better already. For that moment I was at lost at what to do, but right after I thought of the videos in my phone that I could watch.

If I can’t have him, I might die, I might go crazy, I really don’t know what might happen.

As though his name had thorns along with it, hearing it made my heart felt as if I swallowed rose thorns. And they deeply pierced my bruised heart, leaving it electrified and numb.

He occasionally pretend to give me a chance, saying he has no ideal type, or his ideal type is the person listening to him then. But then he would go far away from here, leaving me alone in pain and endless wonder.

It could be that I was just paranoid, he wasn’t going away for someone else. Or it could also be that I am delusional, he never wanted me. Like a doll under his control, I got dragged around by him and whatever he does.

Still, I couldn’t wish to know more about him. As much as it hurt me, as much as this medication killed me slowly, I was already addicted to him. Maybe with stronger doses the pain might go away, but for now, I couldn’t even get sufficient.

I couldn’t figure out this fever, it wouldn’t cool down. Leaving me so cold and helpless; could you hear my wounded heart that was about to burst towards you?

Finally managed to get myself online, and I saw a photo of him and a girl. Who was she? His girlfriend? His cousin? Or just a fan like me?

…

A fan like me… I was just a fan, like any other fan in the fandom.

I dried up like the desert, hoping for a sweet rain that is him, to fall. He was all I need yet I meant nothing to him. My only medicine was him, I couldn’t live if I lost him. I was lovesick for him.

Though I knew he was my sickness, I was addicted to him. So much that the pain… Didn’t matter anymore. Because I knew, I couldn’t live without him.