Doesn't mean a thing...

It's not like you mean anything to me.

In retrospect, Kyungsoo realised that what he said was a move. It was beyond a move and more than anything it was just not true. Baekhyun meant the world to Kyungsoo, it was just that the younger boy had no idea how to express that.

"It's fine" Baekhyun told him, "I never expect you to be nice anyway" there was a sad smile on his lips as he gave the group a half-hearted shrug.

Chanyeol frowned deeply, "No, Baekhyun, this is pushing it. He shouldn't have said that to you. There's joking around and then there's just plain mean"

Kyungsoo frowned, "And I clearly fall into the latter?"

"Yeah, you do" Chanyeol told him bluntly. Sticking up for Baekhyun came easily for him, since the two had been best friends for as long as he could remember. It wasn’t that he didn’t like Kyungsoo, if anything, Kyungsoo was as much of a best friend to Chanyeol, but there were times when Chanyeol just wanted to shake Kyungsoo until he realised what a bastard he was to Baekhyun.

Kyungsoo nodded, "And that's what you all think, is it?"

"It's not that, hyung..." Jongin spoke up, "It's just that... You're a little harsh to Baekhyun hyung sometimes, and I think that you don't realise how much your words hurt him"

Kyungsoo's frown grew larger as he looked around at his friends. They all looked a little weary, though Baekhyun just looked meekly at the floor, and Chanyeol was outright glaring at him. Though he expected nothing less, he and Baekhyun weren't best friends for nothing, "Okay" he said finally, and everyone looked a little taken aback, as if they expected him to fight back on the matter, "Okay, I'm sorry, Baekhyun. I'm gonna just go"

“Soo… That’s not…” Baekhyun tried, but Kyungsoo only shook his head.

“No, it’s fine. See you… whenever” Kyungsoo shrugged before turning on his heel and heading out.

The calls for him to wait and not go were ignored as Kyungsoo bolted. He went back to his apartment complex and took the lift to the top floor, where he got off and walked up two more flights of stairs to the roof.

He liked the roof, because no one else went up there. It wasn't the nicest of places. It was a little dirty and grimy, and it was damp from when it rained, but he'd found a little alcove of sorts in the back corner a couple of years previous and made a kind of den.

Only he knew about it, though he suspected that Baekhyun knew too. The guy was always following him around and seemed to know everything about him.

In the den was a plastic mat, on top of which a small square of carpet that had been left over from when his mother was decorating.

Then, there was a small box that was being used as a table. There were a few pillows in there, either for lying down on, or sitting on, and then he'd hung a large plastic tarp over the entrance to stop anything getting damaged by the rain and damp. It was an ideal hiding spot.

Honestly, he felt bad, he really did. He sat down on one of the small pillows and hung his head in shame as he reached into the box and pulled out a half-eaten bag of m&m's. He also liked to store sweets there, for days like that one.

Kyungsoo had never been good with emotions, but he’d never intended to be mean. He wanted Baekhyun to move on, because even though he liked Baekhyun, and a lot at that, he felt like Baekhyun could do better. Like he should do better, and he didn’t want to hold him back. He didn’t want the older boy to have to put up with his mood swings, or when he didn’t talk for hours on end, or any of that other that he already put up with enough.

"I'm a ing idiot" he sighed, shoving a handful into his mouth then placing the bag on the 'table'.

Sometimes, he wondered if life had it out for him, or if he was just that stupid he could never make things right. And at times like this, he figured it was the latter.

Even so, it didn't surprise him that much when half an hour later the tarp was pushed aside and Baekhyun stood there sheepishly, looking down at him with nervous eyes.

"I'm sorry" he said, "I didn't mean for them to get stroppy with you. It's just... You know what Chanyeol's like, and I told him off for saying those things to you, because it wasn't fair and I-"

"Shut up, Baekhyun" Kyungsoo snapped, "I ing deserved it, alright. I'm a complete bastard to you, and you know I am. Why don't you just realise that you're chasing the wrong person here" he sighed.

Baekhyun sighed also before climbing into the alcove and sitting beside Kyungsoo, pulling the tarp closed as he did, "How long have you known?" he asked, seeing no point in denying what was obvious.

"A few months" Kyungsoo shrugged. He knew he sounded like a complete indifferent prick, and he didn’t want to. It was frustrating as , but his brain and mouth just weren’t working together for this.

"You didn't say anything" Baekhyun whispered, his eyes sad as he looked down at his hands. The hands that Kyungsoo thought were pretty. Well, pretty for hands at least.

Kyungsoo looked at him for a moment, "I had nothing to say" he swallowed, "You just... ing hell, I'm not good at this. You need to like someone who's ing nice to you, Baek. Not me, not someone who doesn't know how to treat someone he cares about"

"You care about me?" Baekhyun asked in surprise.

Kyungsoo groaned, "That's my point! That, right ing there. Of course I care about you, Baekhyun. I care about you more than I care about anyone, and all I ever do is upset you and make you feel like "

Baekhyun nodded, "Alright," he said, "But that's not really it. I know you don't mean half of what you say. You're awkward and stupid, I get that. But, you're meaner to me than you are to the others... You always have been... That I don't get..."

"It's because I like you the most. It's ed up logic, I know... But I'm not good at showing how I feel" Kyungsoo sighed, "I... This is stupid. Can you just go away?"

Usually, he would have gone, he really would have, but not now, not when Kyungsoo was finally saying how he felt, "No" Baekhyun said firmly, "I'm not going anywhere until I get this off my chest"

"Please don't do what I think you're about to do..." Kyungsoo whispered.

Baekhyun only smile mischievously in return, "Do Kyungsoo. You are a pain in the arse. You're mean, and sarcastic and absolutely stupid when it comes to emotions, but despite of all of that, I really ing like you.

 “Because under the fifty layers of dickishness, you're kind,  and caring, and you cook for us, and love us all even though we annoy you. You've been there for me since day one. You held my hand on the first day of secondary school because I was scared. You helped me get through my uality crisis.

 “You let me kiss you for the first time when I was worried the guys would laugh at me for being sixteen and not having kissed anyone. You were the first guy I ever saw , and I'm not gonna lie, hardest ing shower of my life" he laughed softly, "What I'm trying to say, is yeah, okay, you're mean sometimes, but you're not a mean person.

 “You just use that to hide how you really feel, and I get that, I do. I mean, I can't say I'm the best person ever since I know what an annoying little I can be... But I really, really like you, Kyungsoo. , I think I might be in love with you. And I don't know if you feel the same way about me, but... I need you to know that I would do anything for you. Anything, apart from leave you"

Kyungsoo was taken aback, that was for sure, and he knew that if he didn't act soon, he'd end up saying something stupid and sarcastic.

So he acted.

He grabbed Baekhyun by the collar of his polo-shirt and pulled him into a soft kiss.

Baekhyun smiled for a second against Kyungsoo's lips before he kissed him back, and it made Kyungsoo's heart flip.

“So does this mean you accept my confession?” Baekhyun asked softly against Kyungsoo’s lips, refusing to move away as he wrapped his arms around Kyungsoo’s neck.

Kyungsoo chuckled, letting his hands come down to rest on Baekhyun’s lower back, “I dunno. I… I meant it, you know” he said, turning serious again, but keeping Baekhyun in his hold as he looked into the older boy’s eyes, “You can do so much better. You… Anyone would be lucky to have you, Baek”

“Mm, that’s a nice sentiment and all, but I don’t want anyone else. I don’t want anyone else to want me. I want you to want me, because all I want is you. You might think you’re not worth my time, but you really, really are, Soo. You’re worth more than the world, so please… just give me a chance to make you happy. Just… give yourself a chance to be happy…” Baekhyun whispered, pressing a chaste kiss to Kyungsoo’s lips, and then one more just for good measure.

Kyungsoo sighed, resting his forehead against Baekhyun’s, “The guys are gonna think you’re an idiot for giving me a chance after everything I’ve said to you”

“Good for them. But it’s my choice. What we do together is none of their concern” Baekhyun smiled softly, closing his eyes and just letting himself feel close to the other boy.

Kyungsoo sighed again, but there was a soft laugh mixed with it, “You’re stupid”

“Mm, but so are you, so I suppose we match well” Baekhyun chuckled.

Kyungsoo groaned before pressing a soft kiss to Baekhyun’s cheek, “You know I didn’t mean it, right? That you don’t mean anything to me. Truth is… You’re my everything, Baek. You always have been. I just… I was too scared to show you”

“You can always make up for lost time, you know” Baekhyun smiled, his thumb rubbing soothing circles on the back of Kyungsoo’s neck.

Kyungsoo smiled too, “Alright, then I suppose I might as well just say this…” he took a deep breath, “Byun Baekhyun, will you be my boyfriend”

“Do Kyungsoo, I would love nothing more” the elder chuckled before pulling Kyungsoo into a proper kiss.

And so Kyungsoo knew he was mean sometimes, and he was irrational, and sometimes he didn’t handle things as good as he should do, but he also knew that Byun Baekhyun was his everything, and this… this was the best choice he’d ever made in his short life.

A/N: BaekSoo anyone?