~*Your/Hye Ri's POV*~

During the following weeks, I tried to avoid staying home as much as possible. The silence that came with being alone in that big house was terrifying. It seemed to be mocking at me, constantly reminding me that I was alone. That no one was around but me.

Everyone had left me. 

If ever there was a time that I was there for over a few minutes alone, I would make a ruckus. Shuffling my feet, knocking on the walls as I walked by, speaking to myself, laughing at my own humorless joke, sometimes even scaring myself by mistake, anything to make noise and create the illusion that I wasn't alone. That there was someone else there disturbing the silence along with me.

Sadly, there wasn't much I could do to avoid the loneliness in the nighttime. The nights... they were the worst for me. Just the thought sends shivers down my spine... as if a phantom were running his ghoulish fingers along it. When the sun went down, the shadows came out to haunt me, seeming to grab at me, pulling at my hair, at my clothes; coaxing me into the darkness where the unknown lay. I would stay awake, flashlight in hand, trembling under the covers with tears streaming down my cheeks, no promise of stopping. If I was lucky, I was spared a lonely night when Sungyeol would offer to stay by me. Even in his presence, I was unable to rest, but at least it eased my terror. He'd stay up with me, soothing me and giving me comfort, something I dearly needed at the moment.

I wanted to be selfish.

I wanted to have Sungyeol beside me every night. I wanted him to be my night in shining armor shielding me from the evils of darkness, but looking at the bags under his eyes, I'm forced to send him away to rest, sacrificing myself to the loneliness once again in exchange for his health.

Due to my lack of sleep, it was inevitable that I would get my own pair of panda bear eyes. I would have to cake my face with concealer and make up in order to hide the dark circles, only to look like a clown instead. It didn't help that the sleepless nights caused me to saunter around like the undead either.

Ha.

If someone saw me, they probably would think that I'm crazy.

Who knows. Maybe I have gone a bit crazy.

From sleepless nights alone crying to acting as if everything was rainbows and butterflies the next morning, in the least, I must be bipolar. I'm wrecked on the inside, but on the outside, I'm still the girl I once was if not even bubblier.

I wonder how many people I've fooled with my act. How many people think that I'm still okay?

Infinite Oppas? L.Joe Oppa? Would it fool him if he was here?

I don't know. But I must be an amazing actress to be able to hide the emotional distress I'm in.

It hurts. I can't put into words how overwhelming the pain is. Maybe if I tried, I would say that it's as if the whole world has exploded around me.  That it's like I'm on the verge of death yet I still hold on.

It hurts so much, yet I have to keep going.  I have to keep holding on. I have to.

Why?

Simple.

Because he said that he'll be back.

Because he told me to wait for him.