DAY 29: HELP

For all the years that Alex had known Clint, he was patient and kind. It were the two goods things about him. Every time she sees him, it was like being with an energy booster after nights of hard work. Everything about them is natural. Everything she needed was in him. 

So what happens after two months of long distance relationship? What are the things that remained and the things that changed? Because right when Clint took her hand and said, 'Let's get inside', Alex felt nothing but merely the agreement in her mind that says yes they should.

Once inside the apartment, Alex found her words of welcome for her boyfriend. 'Do you want to take a bath? I'll prepare the shower for you.' 

At the age of twenty-seven, Clint still looked exactly how he did three years ago when they first met. He has black hair that now falls to the eyebrows. 'I can do that myself. Stay here while I shower.' He held Alex's face in between his hands and kissed her forehead. To tease his fiancé he added, 'Or do you want to go with me?' 

Alex immediately smack him in the arm. 'What are you saying!' Clint only laughed and went upstairs. Maybe two months is officially gone. In a matter of hours, maybe things will rekindle. Alex would no longer think about the weeks in which Clint ignored her messages and unanswered her calls. And they'd go on preparing happily for their wedding. 

Heading to the kitchen to find something to cook for Clint, Alex sent Flix a thank you message for the car. She can't wait to attend to her commitments now that she's finally never riding a taxi. Old habits die hard but it's never too late to learn new ones. Without thinking it through, she sent another message intended for her bestfriend. 'Chesca, go shopping with me tomorrow please.' Alex doesn't know why she seemed to need it. Putting the phone back inside her jacket, the tips of her fingers touched the car key. She took it out and stared at the BMW logo. 

'Congratulations on your new car. I never heard of you taking your driving lessons.' Alex didn't hear Clint entered the kitchen. His hair was wet and he changed into the clothes that Alex had laid on the bed this morning. Right, I forgot to tell him about driving.

'What do you want to eat? I went to the market this morning-'

'Relax, runway girl. You're making it feel like I'm a stranger here. Don't worry about me, okay?' Clint gave her a back hug. 'I want to cook for you. What do you want to eat?'

'Clint, you've just arrived. You're tired. Let me do the cooking,' Alex tried to free herself from him but Clint only hugged her tighter. 

'I'm not hungry. I ate in the plane,' he reasoned. 'Let's go to the living room. I need to tell you something.' He grabbed Alex's hand and pulled her down to the sofa. Without turning the TV on, he asked, 'Did you miss me?'

That question registered in Alex's mind further than he meant. Shouldn't it be the other way around? Calling and sending messages almost everyday, doesn't that mean missing a person? Or is that called nagging instead? 'Why weren't you contacting me?' 

Clint raised a brow, 'I wasn't? I called you on Christmas Eve, didn't I? And just this morning before my flight we were texting.' Looking at his face, Alex can see no sign of guilt. And that made her hate him more. It only means that all those times she felt ignored by him he didn't notice. All those times she was confiding in Kris and crying...

'You said you needed to tell me something. What is it?' Alex chose to divert. Clint looked at her for a minute; trying to understand what she must be feeling, before taking a card from the table and handing it to her. Alex took it, thinking that it must be a love letter or such. 

She was mistaken. It's an invitation. Their invitation. For the wedding.

"You are cordially invited to celebrate the wedding of Clint Richards and Alexandria Dawson on February 8, 2014."

Alex couldn't believe it. That's- 'February 8? Clint, I...what's this?'

Clint was expecting any other reaction from her but not this. 'You don't like it?'

It was the biggest surprise she's gotten in the week. She can't remember ever talking this out with Clint. Three months ago, when they got officially engaged, Alex made it clear that they'd talk about the wedding preparations by next year. It's not even 2014 yet and Clint already has a date printed in this invitation. 'When did you print this? Who told- I thought...' Alex was totally rumbling over words.

'All the while you were here, I was managing the restaurant in Canada and setting a surprise for you. That's why I couldn't answer your calls. I didn't want myself spoiling stuff. I asked my parents and told some of our friends. I wanted to get things ready so that when I came back, all there's left to do is let you know.' 

Alex remembered that txt Clint sent her a few days back. Would you prefer simple or a big wedding? What did he mean, that the wedding itself is already set and all they have to do is be there on February 8 next year? Did he distribute this invitation to all of their friends already? 'You mean...?' She doesn't know what to and how to say it. 

'Everything's done. The Church, the venue, the souvenirs, the invitations, the catering services, they've all been planned and organized.' Clint talked without letting each word sink-in. Alex could only look at him in complete disbelief. 

She might go insane that very moment if she wanted to. Then she heard herself say, 'How 'bout the gowns? Did you choose which dress I'll wear too? Or did you make your Mom fit it?' 

'A designer wants to meet with you on Saturday. She makes beautiful wedding gowns. See what fits you.' 

Unintentionally, Alex let out a sarcastic laugh. Wow. Just wow. Does Flix know about this, or anyone from her side? February 8. That's five weeks from now. Five!

Clint held her hand, 'Alex, are you alright?' 

Because he's still her boyfriend and she never lied to him, Alex said, 'You shouldn't have kept this from me. This is something we should've planned together. Right now I don't know whether I should be thanking you or not. I don't know if for once I thought of getting engaged today and waking up to a surprise wedding tomorrow. I never dreamed it to be that fast, Clint. I'm sorry.'

Getting to her feet, she went straight to her room and buried herself under the bed sheets. What's it like to have your distant boyfriend come back? What's it like to feel left out in a plan that should've been taken care of by two? Alex hates it. She hates the fact that what Clint did was something that other women might be so happy about and yet she was not one of those women. The fact that her fiancé's considerate and sweet and yet he's forgotten to be just patient and kind. Clint has never been a man of surprises. Lately he is, when he doesn't need to be. 

A message popped in her cell phone. She reached for it and read Kris's txt. 'Happy?'

One word. One question. That's all it was. Yet it struck Alex in the heart. How can Kris think of her at this very minute? How come ever since the two of them became real friends Kris always ends up knowing her so well? What did he mean by asking happy? Was he referring to the car or the fact that Clint's back in Korea? Or did he simply wants to know how Alex is feeling at the moment? What would it be like if she never have met Kris? How are things supposed to be if she never agreed to act as his fake girlfriend? Would they still have met later on? Would they have met in a different circumstance, in a different place? Suddenly, for the first time, even knowing that her real boyfriend's there, Alex longs for Kris's presence. Because Kris; even with his sometimes-cold attitude and stubborn personality, always acted to be wherever Alex's situation demands him to be. 

Alex heard Clint going up the stairs and realized there was no point doing tantrums as if she was still a kid. They'd face this head on. Clint slowly sat beside her on the bed and hesitantly took her hand. 'We can move the date if you want.'

Again, he had it wrong. It seemed too late to think of what Alex wants now. She wanted a lot of things during the span of time that they were separated from each other. In a low voice, she asked, 'Remember when you called me after I've landed back in Seoul? I was about to tell you that I met Kris and he asked me to play as his girlfriend but you already knew. I never got to ask you how you found out. Who told you?'

Clint let go of her hand and slowly lay his back to get some sleep. Before turning away from Alex, he answered, 'He called me. He told me about it himself.'

Alex remembered that night at Yi Gora Beach Resort with Xiumin. He asked her, 'And Kris? Did you ask him? Maybe he's nice enough to call Clint and tell him?' Kris must've been sincere right from the start. Clint dimmed the lamp shade.

'Whose car?' 

Chesca wouldn't stop spazzing about Alex's BMW. The model gladly volunteered to fetch her in her house. The car deserves some show-offs anyways.

'I already told you. My car, okay? It's a Christmas gift.' Alex said, sparing Flix's and Kris's names. 

As planned, they went shopping. Clint was out to meet some business friends near Gangnam. Alex needed distraction. She wanted to leave that February 8-to be wed-Alexandria Dawson for the meantime and just be the December 28-carpe diem-Alex today. She's forgotten about her problems until Chesca sort of opened it up. 'Am I deft or are you really not mentioning anything about your boyfriend being back in Korea?' 

Alex rolled her eyes. 'Yeah, you're probably deft.'

'Alex!' Here comes the nagging. 

A black shirt caught Alex's attention. "If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong" was written in front. She asked the lady for the price and pretended as if she's not friends with the talking parrot beside her. Chesca can't keep shut. 'Are you two okay? When are we hanging out, you, him, me and Xiumin? How's it in Canada? And your in-laws?!'

Controlling herself, Alex whispered, 'Chesca, we should be shopping. Reserve all talks for later, okay?' Then she forced a smile.

Truth is, if only Flix could call her right now and tell her that she's got six or seven appointments to do, Alex would undoubtedly take it. She wouldn't mind working despite the holidays. Unfortunately, her next schedule is not until the 31st. Alex sighed.

Chesca attempted to bring back the Clint topic while they were having lunch. Alex dismissed it many times by changing the subject over and over again. She asked Chesca about school, about Xiumin, about Mr. and Mrs. Linn, about Christmas and she didn't mind Chesca asking her again about the BMW. Keeping Kris out of it, Alex finally said, 'Fine! It's from Flix. You do know she's fond of giving me expensive gifts, don't you?' Her bestfriend beamed.

Right before they reached Chesca's house, Kris called. Alex was driving so Chesca did the honor of holding the phone to her ear. 'What's up?' She tried to sound cool.

'Is your boyfriend strict or will he allow you to go out and see me today?'

Alex snorted for two reasons. One, she's already outside. Two, she doesn't have to ask for Clint's permission. 'Where?'

'G's Entertainment.'

Kris hang up. He no longer needed to say the lines I'll pick you up because he obviously wanted Alex to use the car. 

Dropping off her bestfriend, Alex waved Chesca goodbye. Even with the endless diversion of topics, they both had a great time. Before going out of the car though, Chesca faced Alex and with concerned tone she softly says, 'You know what you're doing, right? If bad becomes worse, you know I'm here.'

Grateful for what she said, Alex needed to add just a few more words. 'Even when good's at best I know you are. Thank you, Chesca. Bye.'

That's how their friendship is. In simpler terms, 'through thick and thin'. 

Alex arrived at G's Ent exactly six o'clock in the evening. Kris's BMW was parked just a block away from the gates. He was standing beside the guard house when he saw Alex. He was amazed on how cool Alex looked like with the car. 'It's my new boyfriend,' Alex joked. 

Kris held her hand and together they passed through the gates. 'Wait!' Alex ran back to the guard, remembering something. 'Aren't you going to ask for my ID?'

She had it this time; somewhere deep in her bag. The guard looked surprised. 'If you're with Mr. Yi Fan-'

'Yes, she's with me. Come on, Alex!' Kris cut the conversation, and Alex had to laugh. Getting inside the building, Kris commented, 'You didn't have to do that.'

'Because I'm with the absolutely one hundred percent famous Mr. Kris Wu Yi Fan?' Alex kid around, the way she said it in Kris's mansion before Christmas day.

The singer shrugged his shoulders. 'I hate to admit it but yea, maybe.' Right, he is boastful.

Once inside the elevator, Alex asked, 'So why are we here? Rehearsing again?' She didn't dwell so much to remember that night she watched Kris rehearse and Kris watched her cry. 

Kris shook his head. 'I need your help.'

Help? What can she possibly help him with? 'With what? Don't tell me we'd be making songs 'cause I don't have talent in that!'

Kris laughed but didn't answer her right away. They stopped on the twelfth floor and entered a room near a concierge. It's a vacant room with only a desk and two revolving chairs. And a hill of letters. 'Help with reading these,' Kris signaled at the amount of letters in front of them. They filled more than half of the room. Fan mails!

What the. Is he planning to read all of it tonight? It will take them more than 365 days! Alex had hanging. Kris laughed at her face. 'Told you I keep my fan mails. I just never had the time to finish reading all of them.'

'And you chose tonight to be the time? You got to pay me some disturbing fee after this!' Alex half-meant it. 

'Disturbing fee?' Kris laughed some more. Alex noticed there were two cups of hot coffee placed on top of the table. Who prepared it for them? Kris distracted her, 'Shall we start?'

Two years ago, Alex never thought of reading Kris's fan mails with him. He'd be the recipient and she the writer. During the years when she was obsessed with him being her idol, she swore to God she sent him at least a hundred messages. What if they come across her letters? What if Kris finds out that she was a big fan of his? Looking at the pile of letters, Alex perceive it to be impossible. 'Where should we start?' She asked for the singer's opinion.

'Hmm, I'll get the letter and you read it for me.' Kris stood in front of the letters, closed his eyes, and picked randomly. The first letter he gave Alex was one that's wrapped inside a gorgeously self-designed envelope. And it was quite long.

Alex cleared . 

"Kris~

I'm your fan from Singapore. This is my 85th letter to you and you still hadn't replied! OMG I love you oppa!"

'O-M-G?' Kris interrupts.

'Short cut for Oh my God.'

Seeing Kris nod and knowing that she can proceed, Alex went on.

"The way you rap is so cool and I love your style! I'm a high school student. Someday I hope I'll get to meet you and maybe we can hug? Lol."

'Lol?' Kris interrupts again.

'It means laughing out loud, you dumb!' Alex emphasized.

'Oh okay, continue.'

"Please be healthy everyday! I am very happy with your success. You are my galaxy prince! Please never change! I love you so much Kris oppa! Please marry me when I'm older!!! Jk."

Certain that Kris will ask her again, Alex says, 'JK for Just Kidding'. This is the reason why reading the fan mails scares Alex. It's reading his fans's confessions for him and pretending as if she never in her whole life wrote one.

'Why are you so good at this?' Kris asked her.

'Good at what? The abbreviations?' 

Kris nodded.

'Uhm...I was a letter sender in my past life.' Alex shared.

The rapper laughed. Alex doesn't see it to be funny. 'To whom were your letters addressed?'

To you, Alex wanted to say. But she will not. 'That's a top secret.' She smiled. 

They continued reading for hours and drank coffee in between. It was past nine when Alex got a call from Clint asking where she is. She needed to tell Kris goodbye. 'You were really being honest when you told me about your fans and your fan mails.' She can't help but recall asking him about them too many times before.

Kris said five words. 'I'm always honest with you.' Alex hopes to remember it forever.

---------------------

June update for y'all! Please comment and upvote! Thank you so much for following this story!

Spoilers: Next chapter will be entitled Day 30: Confession