LAST DAY

Right after Kris drove Alex home, she felt hopeless. She was left crying there, thinking that she will probably never understand and see Kris the way that his friends do. Alex hates herself for even trying. What would you do when you meet your idol? How is that going to make you feel? Alex can think of only positive answers. But why was everything negative in her case? Why can't Kris tell her sorry? What was it about his pride and insensitivity? Alex didn't make it to her room. She fell asleep on her own doorway, her head on her knees. Dreams are sometimes more beautiful than realities.

Alex was waken up by a knock on the door. She didn't want to open it and see who the unexpected visitor was. Her eyes were red either from lack of sleep or too much crying and her hair was all over her face. By the look of the skies outside, it's only eight or nine in the morning. She stood up unwillingly, held onto the doorknob feeling her light grasp, and closed her eyes for a second because the headache was settling in again.

She opened the door and even with her eyes half-closed, it was clear that the man she's been thinking about all night was standing there, acting as if nothing happened hours ago. Kris looked like he wasn't able to sleep through the night too, but he managed to hide it by forcing a smile on his face. He was carrying a basket of fruits in one hand, a leather backpack over his right shoulder and the HBA sweater he's wearing was noticeable. Alex was absolutely clueless what he's doing there. They looked each other in the eye. Alex sure looks a mess. 'Wh-what are y-'

Her voice keeps betraying her. When she tried one more time, Kris cut her off by saying 'Good morning! Can I come in?' And without waiting for her to reply, he already made his way inside the house. It's the first time Kris ever got inside Alex's apartment. He was glad that the kitchen was just right after you entered the main door. He showed the basket he's holding to Alex, 'I brought you some fruits. Have you eaten?'

Knowing that it'd be better not to use her voice, Alex just shook her head. Kris was moving around her kitchen as if she wasn't there. He managed to find the kettle and with a smile he asked, 'Coffee, tea, or juice? I don't know what you drink in the morning. Milk maybe?' Alex tried not to laugh. Again, Kris always has his ways.

'Coffee.' Alex wants something hot. Her cough is dry. Kris searched through the drawer above the sink and all he needed was there. Alex has every container labeled. Kris picked the one that reads Coffee and put a spoonful into a mug. He didn't add sugar. While waiting for the water to boil, he walks to the refrigerator and get some eggs. Alex sat down on one of the dining chairs. Seriously, what is Kris doing here? 

'Scrambled or sunny side up?' Kris asked at her. Alex never knew he's capable of giving her options. He never asked for her preferences before. Maybe she can abuse whatever kindness Kris has in him today. She answered with, 'Scrambled, please.'

Placing the frying pan on the stove and putting some cooking oil, Kris cracked two eggs in a bowl, add a small amount of salt and started to bait. When the pan's already hot, he poured in the eggs and made sure he has the right temperature of heat on. He gave Alex a glance and Alex didn't care how she looks like. Kris snaps a finger, as if realizing something, and walked to look for something in his bag that's on top of the table. 'Can you put this for me?' It's a digital thermometer. He can be thoughtful, huh. Alex took it from his hand and put it on her armpit. Feeling that she can finally speak, Alex asked, 'What are you doing?'

'Cooking you breakfast.' Kris was busy transferring the cooked egg on a plate. 

'I mean...why are you here?' The singer carried the cup of coffee and plate over to the table. The thermometer made a sound and he read it for the two of them. 

'38.4.' He said. And after putting the thermometer back in his bag, he said jokingly, 'I'm here to visit my sick girlfriend.' He positioned himself on the chair opposite Alex. 'Enjoy your meal, Ma'am. Is there anything else you want me to cook?' He sounded nice. But Alex won't let him distract her.

Looking him straight in the eye, she said 'You're so random, do you know that?' 

Kris smiled. 'I've been told.' And with one push on the plates closer to Alex, he instructed 'Eat.' He hasn't lost that bossiness.

Alex took a bite of the egg. Kris was right when he told her that he can cook a little. Reading through her facial expression, she heard Kris asks 'Too salty?' 

She shook her head, lying. 'Just the way I like it.' Kris felt proud of himself.

Running out of words to say, Alex just continued eating with Kris watching her. He told her he's already eaten breakfast in the hotel. 

Halfway through her meal, Kris cleared his throat. He's making sure that Alex listens to what he's about to say. Gaining Alex's full attention, he sincerely say, 'I'm sorry about last night. I shouldn't have brought you there.'

Alex couldn't believe her ears. Kris can actually say sorry, wow. That's great news! Taking her silence for granted, Kris continued on. 'You know what, I think I need to apologize to you for a bunch of stupid things. Since the very first day. Sorry.' He seems amused with himself. 

Expressing how she feels has never been a problem to Alex. She says thank you when she appreciates something and says sorry when she knows she's wrong. It feels good that Kris is at least making an effort. Although Alex isn't sure when it's going to last. She hopes Kris is always like this. She likes this version of him. 

'I never knew you can say sorry. Guess I have to give you a thumbs-up for that.' Alex said. She carried her empty plate to the sink. Kris gestured for her to go back and just sit. He washed it all by himself. 

'Your boyfriend, what does he do?' Kris asked, washing an orange and giving it to Alex. She needs some vitamin C.

Alex doesn't know if that's a good subject. She remembers telling Kris that Clint's not contacting her. She faked a smile. 'He's a chef. His family runs an italian restaurant in Canada.'

Kris made a face, suddenly ashamed. 'So is my dish even close to the ones that he cooks?' 

Alex laughed. 'He never cooks me eggs.'

Not wanting her to break down again, Kris changed the topic. He figured it's time to tell Alex the real reason why he's here. 'Gregson talked to me last week. He said we no longer need to pretend.'

He looked at Alex's reaction. He doesn't know what to make of it. She seems shock and happy at the same time. 'You mean...' She starts to say.

Kris has to clarify it for her in the best way that he can. 'It means you don't have to pretend as my girlfriend anymore. Consider this our last day together.' He tried to smile. He's been thinking about it for the whole week. He only made up his mind after what happened last night. He's no good for Alex, he knows that.

Alex still hasn't said anything.

'He said the fans don't believe the gay rumors, anyway. We'll give you the money in three days.' 

'The money?' Alex has forgotten about what the contract involves.

'I told you we're going to pay you for it.' Kris reminded.

Alex was fast to refuse. 'No, no, I don't want it.'

With one look, Kris knew that she was sure. He didn't expect what her next question's going to be. 'Are you-are you and Lexy back together?' He remembered she saw them kissing in the club. 

Will it be okay to tell her the truth? Will Alex believe what he's going to say? Not wanting to think further, Kris just answered with a simple 'No, we're not. We'll never.' And as if he sensed that Alex is going to ask some more, he diverts, 'Where do you keep your face towels?'

'What?'

'Never mind, I have one in my bag.' He searched through his bag again and this time, he got a face towel and headed to the bathroom. He didn't even ask Alex where it is. 

He came back holding a basin half-filled with warm water and the face towel damped. He placed it on the table in front of Alex. 'Put the towel on your forehead. It'll absorb the heat.' Alex followed. They stayed like that for a while, not breaking the silence. And then it was Kris's time to leave. 'I have to go. I still have to sign some packaged CDs and posters.' He reasoned.

Alex walked with him to the door. The BMW's right there, waiting for its owner. Alex doesn't know why but she suddenly feels lonely in the inside. She watched Kris walked towards his car. Realizing she still hasn't said thanks, she yelled, 'Thank you, Kris!'

Kris stopped on his tracks. He turned to look at Alex standing by the door. 'For what?'

For today, Alex thought. But choosing to sum it up, and wishing she got it right, she said, 'For fifteen days.'

The two of them smiled.

'You've been counting the days too.' Kris felt relieve somehow. This is their kind of goodbye. And for some unknowable reasons, Kris was silently wishing that it's not goodbye after all. 'Can I share something?' He said.

Alex nods. It looks weird talking ten feet away from each other. 

'That's the second time you called me Kris, in fifteen days. First was last night. Although I hope you didn't have to say god damn sick before it.'

Alex remembers. She almost regret it. But then they both laughed. With nothing more to say, Kris resumed walking and Alex waited until she can't see the BMW anymore. Goodbye, fake boyfriend.