Chapter 42

~*Dara’s POV*~

I hold my ending position as I wait for Jae Wook to comment on the two-minute choreography that was prepared. But nothing, he just continued to stand in the front of the dance studio with his hand over his mouth deep in thought. The suspense was killing me.

“You can relax now.” He says while walking towards me. He stops just a few feet in front of me as I let my arms down and wait for the verdict. It still wasn’t coming… Oh god, was it really that…

“It was… fine.” He finally says but looking at his facial expression, I think otherwise. “It’s definitely not the best I’ve seen you perform… but I understand that you were given a much shorter time period than you are used to, also a lot has been happening for you, right?”

I slumped my shoulders but tried to keep my head up despite the growing feeling of disappointment inside.

“As part of your training, you are going to have to know how to deal with outside forces and prevent them from interfering with your career.” He places his hand on my shoulder, “If you really want to be successful, you can’t let other things get in your way of producing something amazing.”

“Yes.” I say calmly and nod.

“I’m only telling you this because I know you can do better. I know you have it in you, so stay strong.” Jae Wook gives me a small smile and squeeze but I couldn’t find it in myself to give him one back. I was too ashamed.

“Alright, enough of that.” He makes his way over to the stereo at the back of the room, “Today I want to focus on switching between choreography and improvisation. I’m sure you’ll have no trouble with this.”

“Good work today. I’ll see you later at practice.” Jae Wook waves goodbye to me before leaving the studio.

“Thank you.” I slightly bow as I watch the door close. A deep sigh leaves my body as I turn to my bag and slump to the ground next to it. What was I thinking? It’s really not a surprise that Jae Wook didn’t like the choreography. Even though Jiyong helped make it better, it was still a horrible piece to begin with… Even I didn’t like it. What was I thinking to present that even when I felt unsure about it?

Training became a lot harder than I thought. Even though I should be comfortable with dance and choreography, Jae Wook managed to make it challenging for me. The level of dancing, technique, and creativity that is required of me is beyond what I’ve experienced. Was I being too confident in myself? Am I really cut out for this?

The vibration from my bag jolts me to life and rummage for my phone. Upon seeing who the text was from, my frown grew even more.

How’d it go? Did Jae like your piece?

Jiyong… I couldn’t think of how to respond to him, in fear that he will be disappointed in me as well. Especially after the suffering he went through last night working on it.

I stare at the text a little longer with my fingers hovering over the keyboard but eventually place my phone back into my bag. I’ve troubled him enough already. I look at the clock on the wall and see that it’s just past noon. Five hours until practice…

Pushing myself up, I make my way to the stereo system in the back and press play; waiting for the music we were using earlier to fill the room. I walk over to the middle of the room and run through the choreography I learned a few minutes ago in my head before starting the first count.

~*Jiyong’s POV*~

I look at my phone for the millionth time only to be welcomed by an empty screen. It’s been two hours already… training should be over… why isn’t she text me back? I place my phone faced down on my lap while looking out of the window of our van. If only the shoot didn’t go wrong last night, I would’ve been able to go to training with her… I feel something vibrate and quickly pick up my phone to check, but nothing. I glare at my phone and drop it in my lap. This is making me go insane. I focus outside the window again in hopes that the YG building was in sight, but I knew we were nowhere close. What’s going on, Dara?

Finally, after what seemed like forever, we pull up in front of the building. I don’t think I even waited for the car to stop before jumping out and rushing into the building. After a few turns and long hallways, I finally make it to the dance studio. Music was blaring from it even with the door closed. I slowly push the door open to see Dara dancing full out in the middle of the room. Her face, hair, and clothes were drenched in sweat. Her face seemed pale and was open trying to catch enough air to keep her body going, but her eyes were locked straight ahead watching her every move in the reflection of the mirror. She was so concentrated that it didn’t seem like she sensed my presence as I slipped in and watched her silently from the corner. To be honest, I was slightly worried of what might happen if I broke her intense concentration.

The song began to fade out as she slowed down her movements and holding her ending pose. The only sound left was her rapidly breathing. I watched as her focus turned back to reality and her eyes slowly shift towards me.

“Ah… Jiyong…” She says in between breaths. While she relaxes and returns to a normal stance, her body suddenly starts leaning towards the side as if she was about to faint. My body rushed towards her and reached my arms out, hoping to break her fall but she manages to catch herself.

“Dara, are you okay?” I wrap my arm around her shoulder for support and allow her to lean against my chest. “Are you dizzy?”

She shakes her head, “No, I’m fine… I’m fine.” I lead her to her bag and gently sit her down. “Here.” I open her water bottle and hand it to her, “Drink.”

“I’m fine…” She says still breathless.

“No, drink.” I say more firmly this time and hold the bottle in front of her face. She returns my gaze before grabbing her bottle in both hands and takes a sip.

“How long have you been practicing?” I asked her as I watch her chug almost the whole bottle.

“Since noon.” She answers before taking one final sip.

“Have you eaten?”

She pauses and takes a minute to think before shaking her head, “Oh. I forgot.”

I sigh and shake my head, “C’mon.” I stand up and reach my hand out to her. “Let’s get you something to eat.”

She looks up at me with furrowed brows, “No… but I still need to practice.”

“No. You are eating. C’mon, get up.” I command but she doesn’t budge. This stubborn girl. “Don’t make me carry you out of here.” drops open.

“You wouldn’t.” The look on her face was priceless but I tried my best to hold in my smile.

“You want to bet?” I try to sound as serious and believable as possible. She still stays seated on the ground, looking around as if not knowing what to do or how to respond. Guess I have to push her even more.

“Alright then, you asked for it.” I say as I bend over and reach my arms out.

“Yah! Okay, okay! I’ll go! You don’t have to carry me!” As she quickly makes her way to her feet, I instead move my hands towards my shoe and pretend to tie my shoelaces.

“Carry you? Who said I was going to carry you?” I tease while flipping my shoelaces and keeping my head down to hide my smile.

I stand up to face her and see that she’s glaring at me but her cheeks were glowing red.

“Let’s go.” I smirk at her before walking towards the door.

“Jerk…” She mumbles.

~*Dara’s POV*~

I look up at him to see him staring at me appallingly, “What?” I ask while chewing.

He grimaces, “Geez, if you were going to eat like that I shouldn’t have come.” He says as he pushes the tray of food away from him. I glare at him before inhaling another spoonful of rice. “Could you eat more like a girl please?”

I swallow my mouthful of food before answering, “I’m starving! I could care less about how I look.”

“Then why didn’t you eat?” He raised one eyebrow at me as he crossed his arms in front of him. He sure is serious…

I gulped and looked down at my food, “I forgot.” I say hoping that he would just drop the topic.

“And why did you forget to eat?” I could feel his eyes burning into the top of my skull as I lower my head even more so I wouldn’t have to look at him in the eye.

“I needed to practice.” I take another spoonful into my mouth and chew slowly waiting for him to shoot his next question at me. But it never came. I slowly lift my head and am shocked to see the mix of anger and worry in his eyes.

“Don’t ever skip a meal. For whatever reason.” He says slowly but clearly, “No matter what. When you wake up, eat. When it’s 12, eat. When it’s 6, eat. If you eat, you can practice for a longer time and more efficiently. There’s no point in practicing on an empty stomach because you won’t ever improve. Understood?”

Once again Jiyong surprises me with another side of him I never knew existed. He was so full of authority; it was like he was born a leader. All I could do was nod my head in his presence, “Yes…”

“Good.” He reaches over for my empty rice bowl and replaces it with his full one, “Now eat up.” He gives me a warning look, “Slowly.”

I nod and dig into his rice. “Wait, but what about you?”

“I ate already on my way back here.” He answers, “Which reminds me…” I wait for him to continue his sentence while chewing.

“Why didn’t you reply to my text?” I swallowed down my food way too quickly almost making me choke. What is with all these questions?! I feel like I’m being arrested for something!

“Ah…” I say while trying to come up with a good excuse, “You texted me? I haven’t looked at my phone since the beginning of training. Sorry…”

“Liar,” He gives me a skeptical look and takes out his phone. He then shows me his screen of our conversation, “It tells me when you’ve read the text message.”

Damn it. I gulp and look at him guiltily, “Now tell me what’s really going on. Did something happen?”

“It’s… nothing.”

“Tell me.”

“No.”

“Sandara.” I flinch at his tone of voice. Calling me by my full name so suddenly was just like a child about to get in trouble. And he’s younger than me too…

I move the food around on my plate and sigh. “I didn’t want to tell you… after you worked so hard and put so much energy into helping me. Especially when you were so sick…” I trail off.

“Jae didn’t like it.” He finishes my thoughts and I simply nod feeling absolutely ashamed.

“So what?”

I lift my head to look up at him and see that he is giving me an indifferent look. “So what if he didn’t like it. Is that what this was all about?”

“But… everyone… YG sajangnim, Jae Wook, Youngbae, even you… you all had such high expectations from me… and in the end I was a disappointment.”

“That’s true. We all do, but that doesn’t mean we don’t expect you to make mistakes or have down moments. I mean you are still human and that’s why you are a trainee so that you fully understand and experience the hardships you will be going through in the future.” He says seriously, “This life isn’t easy. It may seem glamorous and fun from the outside, but it’s filled with tears, blood, and sweat. So it’s completely expected for you to mess up or be scolded and put down. It’s to see if you can handle the pressure and if you can thrive in it.”

I let his words flow through my head that were all beginning to make sense but also making me realize that I have a long way to go.

“You’ve been with YG as a trainee for about three weeks now, so you are going to still be learning and getting the hang of things. But you can’t let negative comments bring you down. You have to use them as motivation to better yourself. It’s good to see that you were so dedicated to improving that you went on that crazy three-hour practice by yourself, but by not eating, resting, and taking care of yourself, it only becomes a punishment. In the end, you will only hurt yourself. When you get negative feedback, no matter how harsh it is, take note of it, learn from it, but don’t dwell on it.”

Seeing Jiyong like this was like looking at a whole different person. I couldn’t help but wonder the type of hardships and experiences he had to go through in order to give such good advice. He was definitely a talented and exceptional artist, he was made for this industry.

“Also,” He says catching my attention again, “I personally sought out to be your mentor to be there for you. I wasn’t forced into it, no one begged me. I wanted to help you.” He looks at me straight in the eyes making me believe in every word he was saying. “So don’t ever worry about me and what I decide spend my time and effort in. That’s my decision and my problem and I feel that I am investing in someone that matters. I know you will grow from it and become just as successful as I know you can.”

I guess I’ve been waiting to hear such words of encouragement… not just from anyone… but from him, my role model… because after hearing his last few words, no matter how hard I tried to keep them back, a single tear managed to escape my eye.

He reached over the table and gently brushed that tear away while smiling.

“Don’t lie or hide anything from me out of guilt or fear or anything.” His stare was so full or warmth. “I believe in you… ”

He paused while I watched a light shade of pink forming at the apples of his cheeks.

“I am willing to always be there for you… so please, let me.”

*BlueNote*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
WAH! Everyone! I'm so sorry for the slow update!
To be shamefully honest...
I had a bit of a writer's block on how I wanted this chapter to start
It took me ages to be satisfied
But I'm terribly sorry for any suffering I might have caused (glyn0217 I'm sorry!)

I hope that this chapter will make up for it
And I thank you all for being so patient with a noob writer like me!

I look forward to reading your thoughts on this chapter ^^
Love you all and enjoy~

*If you are confused about layout/weird details that seem wrong+right at the same time, please read the story description!*