Chapter 25

“I better get going.” Youngbae stands up and gathers his things.

“Where you off to?”

“Um, just meeting with Jae Wook to go over some choreography.”

I nod and give him thumbs up, “I see, well good luck then! And I’ll see you later tonight at practice?”

He nods and pats my head, “Yep, I’ll see you, kid.” He does his signature winks before leaving me in the studio. Once I’ve seen that he’s left, I relax immediately, letting all of my nerves rush out of me. Well, at least now I know I can still be normal around him … I think to myself while putting my hand over my heart. I missed being able to just talk and joke with him. It was… comfortable.

I spin around in the chair as I take in the entirety of the room. I haven’t actually been in the room before. It was nicely decorated and well lit. So… this is where G-Dragon’s masterpiecs were created.

My thoughts are interrupted when I hear the door open and see G-Dragon himself walk in casually.

“O-Oh, you’re in here?” He asks not really meeting me in the eye.

I guess it would be weird for me to be in here as just a ‘backup dancer’.

“Yeah, I was just here with Youngbae earlier… he wanted to show me something.” I leave out the part where I was singing to test my abilities as a secret YG trainee.

“Ah, I see.” That’s all he says as he sits at the table behind me. “Well, I’m going to get started on fixing up my new songs. So…”

“Oh!” I stand up realizing that I’m probably being rude, “I’m sorry, then I’ll let you get to it.” I say while heading for the door.

“No!” He calls out and stops me in my tracks, “No, I was going to ask… if you wanted to stay and watch?” He scratches the back of his neck and shyly adds, “Maybe… let me know what you think?”

I stare at him, unblinking and not completely sure if I heard him correctly but a smile forms immediately on my face. “Really?” I let out before realizing how overly excited I sounded. I guess my admiration for this man hasn’t all quite disappeared.

He laughs at my reply and shows me a warm smile, “Of course.” Then he flicks a bit of his blonde hair back, “Anything for a fan.” He lifts his nose up in the air, proudly.

Psh, maybe not.

I roll my eyes but can’t help but let out a laugh as I plop myself on the couch in the back of the room. I was excited and giddy. I never really took an interest in the music industry before but just the thought of being able to watch G-Dragon work was exhilarating. We begin to talk about his new album, the songs he has so far, how many he still has to complete or fix, and once again, he has written the lyrics for most of them.

It was amazing to be able to just sit there and talk to my ex-idol about his work, his passion, and his drive, to be able to really understand the meaning behind his songs and his lyrics. I couldn’t help but feel excited for him and strangely proud of him. Talking to him made me realize how normal he actually is. How he is just the same as everyone else, but just that he made his dreams a reality. The way he talked about his music, his lyrics, and his songs, was nothing that I’d ever seen before. There was light in his eye, pure happiness in his voice, and so much life in his hand gestures and movements. There is no mistake that he was doing what he really loved. And I couldn’t help but feel more blessed to be able to witness all of this.

Our conversation comes to a stop when Teddy walks in. Jiyong briefly introduces us to each other but I could see the recognition in Teddy’s eyes when he said my name. I guess YG sajangnim has already informed him about me. As Teddy goes to prepare, Jiyong turns to me, “Just warning you, it might get a little boring so feel free to leave whenever you want.”

He was absolutely, 100% wrong. It was anything BUT boring.

I watched, completely fascinated as he began recording one of his songs, ‘A Boy’. Each time, I thought he sounded great, but each time he wanted to do it again and did it even better. While rapping, his voice flowed so smoothly but was sharp and powerful at the same time. At some point, I couldn’t tell if he was the one leading the music or if the music was leading him. When the chorus came, it was amazing to see him transition to singing effortlessly. To put it simply, he completely blew me away with his talent.

It was also clear that he was so immersed into his work, it seemed that he forgot I was there occasionally. There would be moments of frustration and mistakes that he’d curse and Teddy would scold him for it. When he’d remember I was there watching, he’d be shocked, cover his mouth and hide his face. I really didn’t care though. I understand the moments of being completely lost in doing something you love that you forget everything around you and become more relaxed and yourself. And to be honest, the Jiyong that I’m witnessing now and when we were talking earlier, it resurfaced my feelings of admiration for him. Seeing him like this made my heart pound and I couldn’t take my eyes off him.

I had no idea how much time has passed but I suddenly hear Jiyong curse to himself as he stands and turns to me, “We’re late to practice.”

I jump to my feet and look at my watch to see that indeed we were 15 minutes late.

“Jae Wook is going to kill us!” I exclaim and grab my bag. He says bye to Teddy and is already at the door, “Come on!” He extends his hand to me and I grab it without thinking twice. He pulls me out and through the door as we run together towards the dance studio.

“So, as I was saying, Music Bank is coming up at the end of this week and we will be performing ‘Only Look at Me’. Sohee and Dara, I trust that you two know the choreography for it. Let’s run over it a few times then go back to the choreography for G-Dragon’s new album.” Jae Wook says.

Nervousness started to take over me. This was going to be my first live performance and it was the only song I wasn’t completely comfortable with…

We all took our places with Jiyong standing in the middle. As the music started, Jiyong began to mouth the words, then just as choreographed, CL is the first girl to dance with him. I watch as they move with each other as if they’ve been doing it for a long time. CL’s body flowed emitting iness. I suddenly wished that I could be that y… After CL, Minzy switched in. Despite her age, she could dance just as sensual as CL. It was clear that she felt comfortable with her body and knew exactly the right ways that made her appealing and feminine. She was a mixture of cute and y. Then Bom jumps in making body rolls complementing Jiyong dancing. It was amazing to see that all of these girls could easily transform their style of dancing from cute, y, to strong. It made me wonder if I am really supposed to be here.

Finally, as Bom and Jiyong finish their duet choreography, the other two girls and Sohee jump in and begin dancing together surrounding Jiyong who was in the middle. My eyes are on Sohee now, as she begins to dance along with the others. Every hit was on spot and her charisma was shining through as usual. It’s only been a week and a half for her but it’s clear that this is where she belongs.

The guys make there way into the center and surround Jiyong, dispersing the girls and walk off stage. They begin to dance to the second verse, all completely in sync. My eyes jumped from each of them, in awe at how they were all such good dancers. However, no matter how good they all were, especially Youngbae, I couldn’t keep my eyes of Jiyong. Just like at the concert a few years ago, he made everything else disappear. I watched as he sang along to the song and looked at the mirror as if looking over an audience. Even in the practice room, his presence is so strong.

I’m so distracted that I almost miss my cue. I quickly move in front of Jiyong as the rest of the guys exit. We begin to dance as I’ve remembered it, moving in certain directions, remembering to look at him at specific moments. The moves weren’t difficult or challenging… but I just wasn’t feeling it. For some reason, even though I was doing the correct moves and at the correct timing I just couldn’t feel it deep down like I usually do. Soon, our duet ended and the rest of the dancers came onto the stage, partnered up. I make my way around them and prepare myself at the middle back of the stage as I watched the rest of them dance. On cue, I make my way to the front to meet with Jiyong again as we do the last bit of the choreography, again, I’m just an empty moving shell.

Finally, we finish.

“I guess everyone knows their parts.” Jae Wook looks towards me, “Just make sure to show some kind of emotion and put some feeling behind it. Let’s run it again.”

We run it again, and again, and again. Each time I am enthralled by everyone’s dancing especially Jiyong’s and each time, I fail to connect my feelings with the dance.

As we finish another run, I turn to look at Youngbae who gives me a questioningly look. All I can do is just shrug at him since I am not sure myself on why things aren’t clicking like they usually do.

Jae Wook sighs and walks to the front of the room. “Alright, I guess that’s enough for now. We need to get back to work.” The frustration in his voice is clear and I immediately feel like a failure.

“Good work everyone.” The dance studio rings with everyone’s voices. We all make towards each of our belongings and a few are already heading out the door. As I pack up my things and get ready to leave, Youngbae comes up from behind.

“Hey, wanna go grab dinner?” He asks with a smile on his face.

I smile back but feel disappointment inside, “I’m sorry, I’m actually going to work on a few things before going home tonight.”

He tries to convince me to do otherwise but I stick to my decision. I have to do it.

“Aish… as stubborn as always… fine, but do you want me to stick around with you? Get you food?”

I consider the thought but know that he’s not the one I should be asking for help.

“No,” I shake my head, “It’ fine. You should go eat and rest well at home! I’ll be fine.”

He frowns at my suggestion but knows that I won’t have it any other way. “Arraso… text me when you get home then. And you better eat.” He warns and then ruffles the top of my head, “See you.”

I watch as he leaves the room. It would’ve been fun to do this with Youngbae and it’s not that I think he wouldn’t be helpful… but in order to improve, it had to be someone else to help me. Out of nowhere, butterflies started flutter in my stomach as I approached the other side of the room. I took a deep breath before making my request.

“Um… Jiyong.”

*BlueNote*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Jjang, update!
Hope you guys like this one. Get to see GD in action :)
Also, as for the choreography to 'Only Look at Me' if you guys haven't seen it
I suggest watching this video here!
Just imagine Taeyang as GD (if you can) and the backup dancers as 2NE1 and BIGBANG!

Next update coming soon~
Love you all and thank you for the comments as always!!
 

*If you are confused about layout/weird details that seem wrong+right at the same time, please read the story description!*