I did end up going to the Idol-Off that Saturday, with Mason and SHINee. Minho had told TOP that he didn't have feelings for me anymore, so that made me feel better about being seen around with him. Reluctantly, I kind of tried to dress up, but I wasn't feeling too colorful http://i1142.photobucket.com/albums/n620/BigBangGirl1624/I%20Was%20Completely%20Okay%20Until%20I%20Met%20the%20Choi%20Bros/Fashion/emmaclub.png

We got to the club, and I just mainly stayed around Taemin. He was a really good friend, I've come to learn.

We were all sitting at SHINee's seat section, and I couldn't help but look around. All the usual people were here, and my heart started beating faster when I saw TOP with 2NE1 and Big Bang.

Everyone was talking over there, while TOP just sat on the couch, head leaned back, eyes clothes. But I knew he wasnt sleeping.

"Hyung." Taemin said to Onew, who was looking at the setlist for tonight. "Who's singing what tonight?"

"We are singing JoJo, of course. Super Junior is singing It's You, Big Bang is singing Haru Haru, 2NE1 is singing Lonely, and Girls Generation is singing Tun Devil Run. For Solos.... G-Dragon is Singing Obsession, you're singing Romeo and Juliette, and Top is singing Oh Mom."

"What's Haru Haru?" I asked.

"It means Day By Day." Minho explained. "It's basically a song about saying goodbye when you break up."

"All the songs are that this week." Taemin noted.

"Idol-Off... Heartbreak Edition." Key sighed. "Not really, but that's what it sounds like."

"Oh, yeah." Minho said, taking something out of his pants. "Hyung forgot his cell phone at home, and Umma wanted me to give it to him." he stood, then looked at me. "Do you want to come with?"

I finally realized the hyung he was talking about was TOP, because I saw the be@rbrick phone chain hanging from the iPhone.

I shook my head. "No... I'll say hey to Daesung and CL later."

Minho walked over to the YG section. He said something to TOP, and TOP simply opened one eye and held out his palm. Minho gave him his phone, smiled and said Goodluck to everyone, then came back over to us. "He is not speaking." Minho sighed. "He hasn't for a week now around me or Siwon or even Umma and Appa."

I bit my lip nervously. It was all because of me.

-----

It was time for the performances, and Super Junior went first. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGBqoVJ8qbw They were all wearing white suits, and as soon as the song started, I noticed it was a sadder sound than what they usually do. The all looked sad while they sang, and Siwon sang the first part of the chorus. He tried not looking at me, I could tell, but he couldn't help but glance. They also did this cool chest pump thing, and Eunhyuk was really impressive at it. Yesung's voice sent shivers down my spine, and he collapsed to his knees at one point.

They ended, and we all clapped. My heart was pounding, and I was thinking "Please, Siwon. Please DON'T come over here."

He didn't, and I breathed a sigh of relief.

I saw five stools being set up onstage, and Big Bang took their places on them.

An accoustic song started, and the lights finally showed onstage so we could see Big Bang. They were all sitting on stools, in some kind of black outfit (These Outfits: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pxKUzHbpGKE ). I can't lie; TOP looked incredibly good.

The song started (This performance:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Rsf5Xs1ygw&feature=fvsr) , and it started with TOP rapping. It was really powerful, and I couldn't take my eyes off him. At some points he would just close his eyes and rap his heart out, and it was so amazing. Tears came to my eyes when I realized I couldn't congratulate him afterwards.

They finished their song, and SHINee left to go onstage http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qC8DEltOnbg. I still had Mason with me, though. He put his hand on my shoulder. "You okay, sis?"

I casually wiped my eyes from any signs of crying and I nodded. "Yeah. I'm perfectly fine."

Inside, I was being torn apart.

----

After a few more performances, it was time for TOP's Oh Mom. I saw a microphone stand onstage, and that was it.

Then, TOP walked onstage, dressed in a red suit. Like always, he was flawless.

The song started, and it had more of a rocker feel to it http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mA0CoqCsdpY. TOP did this cool rap-singing thing.. I was actually surprised when he looked over at me a few times, though it hurt each time.

He was so into it, and during the chorus, he would take the mic from the stand and started head banging. It was amazing to watch him.

At the end, he actually laid on the ground, and he put one hand over his eyes.

"Wow." Mason commented when TOP's song ended. "If he doesn't win, then this place is rigged."

Taemin nodded. "I even agree, and I'm against him in this competition."

While G-Dragon sand his song, I felt someone lightly grab my arm. I jumped and turned around to see who was holding my arm.

"Come with me." TOP said simply, not looking at me, but turning around and leading me out of the club instead.

I gulped, extremely nervous. Was he going to yell at me some more?

We walked out of the club. TOP let go of me, sighed, and looked up at the night sky. He bit his lip, then looked back at me. "Let's end this."

This lifted my heart a little bit. I nodded. "The fighting? Yeah, I totally--"

TOP shook his head. "Not the fighting." he pointed at both of us. "This."

I looked at him, confused. "Top, there isn't anything to end."

"Yes there is." TOP nodded. "And we're ending it right now."

My heart sank. "You mean being friends?" my eyes clouded up with tears.

TOP looked away and nodded. "When I see you, all I think about is how you kissed my brothers. And I can't take it. I don't want to see you."

That was so mean, I felt like I got stabbed.

I started crying. "Top, you're just still mad. Just give it a few more days and-"

TOP shook his head and took a deep breath. "It would have never worked out anyway. It never does."

I shook my head and crossed my arms. "You're lying. You still like me, Top. I know you do."

TOP bit his lip again and said nothing.

"See? Unless you can look me in the eye and tell me you have no feelings for me, I'm not giving up on us."

"It's useless." TOP said.

"Then tell me you don't like me!" I exclaimed.

TOP looked at me. "Emma, I don't like you anymore." He said, his voice cracking.

I sniffled and wiped my eyes. "Whatever. I can't believe you."

TOP ran his hand through his hair. "I don't care if you believe me or not. Just... Do one thing for me."

I scoffed and looked at him. "What?"

"Go out with Siwon." TOP said finally. "He'll be the best for you. You guys are really alike."

I scoffed again, and shook my head. "Oh, shut the up." I pushed past him to walk back into the club.

TOP grabbed my arm again. "Emma, I'm serious. If you don't ask him out, then I'll make sure he asks you."

I looked at him and yanked my arm away. "You are extremely messed up." I shook my head and walked into the club.