Warning: another unhappy one, sorry ))):

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She’s tried, several times actually, but she fails herself each and every time.

The first time she tries, she tells herself that she’s getting no where with him, that he’s just that one cute and friendly guy in her class, that he’ll speak to anyone and everyone because he’s just as social as, well, a social networking site.

But then he says her name, and suddenly, all her efforts go down the drain because it seems as if things might be happening- he knows she exists.

The second time she tries, she tells herself that she’s over thinking things, that she’s nothing special to him, that all those ‘hello’s and smiles mean nothing, that she’s just been blowing every interaction they’ve had way out of proportion.

But then he pulls her behind the door before she can reach her class and tells her to just stay with him for a moment, and suddenly, all her efforts go down the drain because it seems as if things might be happening- he wants her there.

The third time she tries, she tells herself that it’s now or never. It’s summer and the perfect time to get over Himchan and all his darn perfection.

But then she bumps into him before class and they sit alone and just talk; talk about all the things that are going on in their lives, their interests, their stresses, everything, and suddenly, all her efforts go down the drain because it seems as if things might be happening- he wants to get to know her.

She loses count of all the times she tries once more to forget about Himchan after that and decides to just go with the flow.

For a while, it seems as if there’s no point in forgetting, that things might be happening.

Himchan texts her about all his problems, from Youngjae being a snarky brat to Zelo’s first crush- he tells her everything.

Himchan goes out of his way to pick on her, blowing whistles in front of her face and constantly poking at her cheeks (he says they remind him of bunnies when they’re eating, all fat and poofy; he calls them fatsmatos)- he gives his time to her.

Himchan calls her at four in the morning just because he can’t sleep and needs someone to talk to, to rant about how everyone is falling head over heels for Daehyun and not him- he needs her.

Himchan tells her she’s cute (once more comparing her to a bunny), even cuter than the definition of cuteness itself; Jongup- she doesn’t know what to feel.

Himchan pulls her into a hug when things start getting tough, when things are looking bright, whenever he feels like it- she thinks he likes her

So when Himchan texts her one day and says that he thinks he likes this girl Yongguk introduced him too, it all but breaks her heart.

She decides then that it’s time to forget him. If she was unable to persuade herself, then surely he would be able to persuade her. It was a plan of psychological deceit, tell Himchan she liked him, knowing she would get rejected just to blow out that small flicker of hope in her heart, to finally succeed in getting over him. Have him run away from her and break her heart.

But it doesn’t work that way- the plan fails.

Because here Himchan is, texting her as always, acting like nothing had ever happened, like they’re still the friends they are before. And everything is just so hard, because as much as she tries, she can’t hate him. She still listens to all he has to say, and knowing Himchan, he has lots to say (especially regarding how tight his pants are, that’s a favorite topic of discussion). She still lets him pick on her, tell her she’s cute, hug her; everything.

She decides then that people come into the lives of others and take a role, some stay, and some go, but that no matter what role Himchan chooses to take, all she wants is for him to stay.

Because it doesn’t matter to her what label is thrown on them, as long as she has him in her life, that’s all she’ll ever need.   

So as sadistic as it may seem, she couldn’t be any happier that she failed once more. 

-x-

A/N: I apologize for the nonfluffy unhappy monstrosity that is this story

I don't know why I'm typing all these unhappy things recently, I'm quite happy at the moment

D: 

honestly, it doesn't have to be Himchan, it can be any of the guys, but he's now my go to character x_____x \