28. MEDIAN STERNOTOMY

I stared at Jonghyun’s parents and brother in trepidation. The nurse guided them to uncle and me. I could see them look us over as they approached. I stood up and bowed to all of them.

“I am Lee Jinki, friend of Jonghyun. I am the one who called you a while ago.”

His father took the lead and spoke to me, “How is he? What happened? Why were we not informed immediately?”

Uncle explained to him, “He is in surgery. He was shot while breaking up a drunken brawl during his shift. We assumed that the department had called you.”

Jonghyun’s mother started crying loudly. I pointed to a nearby chair and his brother guided her to sit. I got her a glass of water to drink.

“Please don’t cry. He will be alright.” I tried to calm her down.

“What if he is not? I had told him not to join police service.” His mother continued crying.

“Don’t say that. He will be fine. His surgery will be a success.” I repeated to her.

His brother asked me, “How come we were informed by you and not the department? That also very late.”

“I am sorry I don’t know the answer to that. I called you because I wondered why you were not here.”

“We are here now. Thank you for waiting for us. We will take care. If you want, you can leave.”

I looked at him in surprise. Did they not know who I was or what I meant to Jonghyun?

I shook my head, “I am not leaving the hospital till he is discharged and ready to go home too.”

My soft declaration made all of them look at me and I could see realization dawn on their faces. “So you are the one he left home for.” They said almost in unison.

I kept silent. Uncle came to stand behind me in support. He waited a minute for them to say anything more and then guided me to sit in a chair near the nursing station. I resumed my pacing. Uncle went to get coffee for himself and puppy’s family. Jonghyun’s father trailed after him.

I went to the nurse to check for any update but her answer was negative. Jonghyun’s brother motioned to me to them. I went.

“So you are my brother’s lover?”

“I am not his lover. I love him. But we are not lovers.”

“All the same,” His mother spoke up. “I don’t want you here. Go away. You are nothing but an ill omen for my son.”

I turned away and resumed my pacing. I kept murmuring, “Puppy I love you. Come back to me. You promised me always. I want my always puppy.” I wondered if the vibrations of my murmurs could reach my puppy. Chaos theory test time. I sat down in the nearest chair and imagined a healthy laughing puppy. I was determined to have that puppy back with me soon.

I put my fingers over the pulse in my wrist. I felt my heart beating and blood pulsing under the skin. As long as my heart was beating, I believed my puppy was with me, he was keeping his promise to me.

We were the only people in the surgical unit’s waiting lounge.

After 4 hours 23 minutes 41 seconds, a surgeon appeared. I ran to meet him, “How’s Jonghyun?”

“Are you Lee Jinki?”

“Yes. How’s he?”

I could feel uncle stand behind me and Jonghyun’s family surround us too.

The surgeon explained to me that Jonghyun was shot 5 times in the chest and shoulder area. All the bullets exited at the time of shooting. One bullet had bypassed all organs and blood vessels and had passed cleanly through his left shoulder. The other four had gone through his lungs, two through each lung. One of the bullets that had gone through the left lung had also penetrated the left pulmonary vein which supplied blood from the lungs to the heart. It was due to the combination of lack of oxygen-rich blood and acute blood loss that his heart had stopped a total of 3 times but he was revived quickly each time. The team of surgeons had performed open chest surgery to repair the holes in his lungs and the pulmonary vein.

According to the surgeon, Jonghyun was a very lucky man. Usually these many gunshot wounds meant severe damage to the lungs or even the heart. But God had been smiling on Jonghyun and his entry and exit wounds were clean. The surgeons had not removed any part of the lungs. They had performed emergency median sternotomy because of his brief but recurring cardiac arrests and internal hemorrhaging from the torn vein into the chest cavity.

His recovery was expected to be complete, though it would take time. He would be in the ICU for a day and if there were no complications, he would be shifted to a private ward. He could be released to my care in 10 to 14 days depending on his recovery. In time he could resume normal activities but would need to be careful for the first year.

I was informed that Jonghyun was on his way to the ICU and if I wanted I could see him briefly. The surgeon warned me that it would not be a pretty sight. I quietly told him that I was a medical student once, hence, used to such things. He nodded. I thanked him for his hard work in saving Jonghyun’s life. He patted my shoulder and walked away.

Uncle asked me to explain. I explained, to all, in layman’s terms everything that the surgeon had said to me.

Taking the directions to the ICU from the nursing station, I almost ran to the ICU. I had to see my puppy with my own eyes to completely believe the surgeon. In the ICU unit’s visitor lounge, I was asked to wait as Jonghyun’s transfer was in progress.

I paced as time crawled slowly. Finally after nearly half hour, the nurse informed me I could enter the ICU and meet Jonghyun for a few minutes. I rushed to the ICU door, only to be stopped midway by his family. His mother insisted on going inside first. The nurse stopped her.

“I am sorry, you cannot go inside. Only his next of kin can visit him in the ICU.”

“But I am his mother. How can you not let me meet my son?”

“Only his next of kin can go inside. And that is Lee Jinki-ssi as per the papers with us.”

“How can he go in and I, his mother, cannot. What kind of hospital care is this?” His mother continued to question the nurse.

I slipped by all of them and entered the ICU. The nurse inside had me first sterilize my hands and then guided me to his bed.

I stood still looking at him. He was hooked up to a lot of machines. A heart monitor was steadily beeping his heart rate and yes, his heart was beating. He had an endotracheal tube to help keep his lungs inflated. His face was pale. His body still on the bed. Many tubes and wires snaking out from under the sheet.

I kissed my fingers and pressed to his lips. “I love you puppy,” I whispered softly to him. “For now till eternity, I will always love you. Get well soon love. Minki is waiting for you at home.”

His bangs were all over his face. Gently brushing them away from his face, I carefully pressed a kiss to his forehead. “Don’t leave me puppy. I cannot live without you. You have to get well and come home with me. I will spend my whole life telling you how much I love you. Just come back home.”

I peeked under the sheet covering him, to see a huge swath of bandages covering all of his chest, and sides almost to his navel. “It’s okay puppy. Don’t worry. All of this will heal. Main thing is that your internal bleeding has stopped. The rest we’ll manage puppy. You don’t worry. Just concentrate on opening your eyes soon. I love you puppy.”

I patted his hair as I talked to him non-stop. He must still be under the effect of anesthesia and sleeping soundly. But I couldn’t stop myself from talking to him. We had not gone without talking or messaging for so long a time before.

When my time was up, I reluctantly left him alone again. I came out and started weeping into uncle’s chest, scaring him.

“He is fine uncle. Sleeping from the pain killers and anesthesia. His heart is beating. He is going to be okay.” I kept talking and crying at the same time. I was so relieved that I was crying tears of happiness.

My puppy was going to be okay. I would have my lifetime with him.