21. JUST NOT MARRIED

Two months passed since that fateful night when puppy and I promised our always to each other. I my destiny bracelet all the time. Every time I met puppy he would discreetly check if I was still wearing my bracelet. Then he would show me his wrist. For us this new brief daily ritual was a silent renewal of our vows every day.

I had still not decided what to do about my house. Uncle was clear that I was with them for life.

“Jinki, are you uncomfortable here? You are welcome to stay with us for life. In fact, I prefer that only.”

Imo tried to tell him that I might meet someone again and might want to move out.

He winked at her and said, “Dae Hei why don’t you simply say that he wants to move in with Jonghyun?”

I blushed beet red and protested.

“Jinki do you really want to go back to your house?

“No uncle. That’s why I am seeking your advice about what to do with my house? I am quite comfortable living here with you and imo.”

He winked at me this time and asked, “And what about Jonghyun? Are you going to keep him waiting whole of his life?”

“I am so confused right now and you are really not helping me think straight uncle. Not fair.”

“Fine. No more teasing. Tell me what you have on your mind.”

“Either put my house on rent like the rest of the building or sell all of it and purchase another house.”

“Sell and purchase another house or sell and invest the money and move in permanently with us. We have three bedrooms and two baths. One room can be shared by your imo and sisters. Or Jiyeon can move in with her grandmother. You and Jonghyun can take the third room. Minki can sleep with you, Dae Hei or me wherever her little heart desires. By the time she’s old enough to need more space, Soo would be married. Don’t decide now. Think it over.”

Girls silently ate their dinner and listened to us talk. I could see heads nodding at the room division and Soo’s frown at the mention of her marriage.

“Appa and Tae may not allow sale of the house.”

“Then simply give it back to them. Between me, you and Jonghyun we have enough to run our family and take care of girls’ future. You don’t even need the rent from there anymore. Just give the house key to Daewon-ssi and forget it all.”

I got up from my chair and hugged him for a long time and whispered to him, “Uncle I hope when I need, I have a heart as big as yours. Thank you for marrying imo and becoming my second father.”

He just kissed my forehead and patted my hair. “Do you need anything from the house?”

“No, I have lived without whatever is there for over a year. I neither need nor want any of that stuff.”

Imo gave me her own advice, “No Jinki you should not return the key to hyeongbu. Taemin has been given enough property and money by your father. It is not right that you return your house too. Hyeongbu has been telling everyone for years that he has given this house to you as a wedding gift. Why should you return it?”

“Imo that’s the point, I don’t want anything that causes acrimony in the family. If my returning the house and other properties will make Tae and appa happy, then let me do it please.”

“No Jinki it is not fair to you and Minki. Hyeongbu must keep his word to treat you equally like Tae and Minki like Jongin.”

“Imo those are just words of love, spoken in the heat of the moment. We both know that they hold no meaning beyond the moment.”

“Dae Hei, Jinki is right. Let him return it.”

“No it is not right. Hyeongbu should keep his words to treat his children equally. Taemin has more than enough for his family and seven more future generations. Jinki has only this house in his name. Jinki you need to think of your daughter as well. If you don’t want the house, keep it for her as her wedding gift. I think it will be stupid to give back the house. Don’t think that I don’t know how you have been returning back your wedding gifts one by one to him. Now the only property in your name is this house. And you want to return this also to him. No Jinki no. This is most unfair to you. You should hold on it.”

I went to hug her and dry her tears. “Imo it is just a house. I do not believe much in God but I believe in destiny. No one can give me more than my destiny and no one can take from me what is destined for me. And if my turning a blind eye to the money mechanics of appa and Tae keeps peace in the family, I prefer to do so. My lovely imo, your love means more to me than anything in this world. I will keep the house on one condition. It has three apartments. I will keep one for Minki and give one each to Soo and Jiyeon. Will you accept this condition?”

“No Jinki.” Both imo and uncle spoke together.

“I have same reasons imo. As you don’t want appa, Tae or Kibum to say anything to you over the property, my self-respect also will not allow me to be insulted anymore over money and property. I have been keeping silent for years and will do so in future also. But it hurts every time I am belittled for it. I have got this opportunity to make a new future for Minki and myself. Let me take it. I will work hard and make my own destiny. One day, I will have enough money of my own that no one can take away from my daughter.”

“Tae will find a way even then to take it away from her. He is that type. Open your eyes and stop being a stubborn fool.”

“No imo, I am not keeping the house. Call me a stubborn fool. But I cannot fall in my own eyes. Please try to understand my point of view.”

“All I understand is that one day hyeongbu will regret giving his everything to Tae and Kibum. You are far better than both of them put together and I hope in his lifetime your father realizes that you are his true treasure.”

I kissed imo’s cheek and sat back in my seat. I handed uncle the key to the house. “Please have this key returned to appa.”

“How about we call everyone for dinner tomorrow and you give it to him yourself. He might not take it if I give it. Call over Jonghyun also.”

“Appa will find it weird to find Jonghyun here every time they come for dinner.”

“Hang what your father thinks. Jonghyun has got a right to be here for you. He will feel bad otherwise. By the way where is your puppy tonight? It doesn’t feel the same having dinner without him. Minki is not even visible without sitting in his lap.”

“His mother is not well, so he returned home early.”

“Dae Hei did you send something nourishing for his mother?”

“Do you have to even ask? I sent not only something for her but dinner for the whole family as well so she wouldn’t have to cook. Toki’s lapdog gave me a lot of arguments before agreeing to take the food home.”

I blushed at imo’s calling Jonghyun my lapdog. It appeared that she preferred to call him that since the night he sang his confession.

“Imo the girls will learn all nonsense nicknames.” I protested.

“Well then you both stop calling each other all these names first.”

I had no answer to her logic.

“Jinki I have been making inquiries as per our last discussion a month ago. We will discuss it after dinner. Soo you give Minki her bath so you mother can be present for our conversation.”

Soo nodded and continued eating. I looked at her and asked with a poker face.

“Soo what kind of a husband do you want? We will need to start looking now only to make sure we find the perfect one by the time you are old enough to marry.”

She responded with an equally straight face, “One like you oppa.”

I choked on my food. Uncle patted my back till I could breathe normally.

Imo doubled up in laughter at my reaction. She and Soo must have had this discussion beforehand.

Both uncle and I looked at Soo for clarification.

“Oppa it’s very simple. If he can bear the children in the marriage, I would be most thankful. Plus, you are intelligent, handsome, nice, polite, tall, and like Jjong oppa says, you are dubu onew. In conclusion, after thinking hard I am very sure I want a husband like you. So go ahead find me your clone.”

Uncle began laughing equally hard while I could only stare at her in shock.

Jiyeon piped up, “I want a husband like Jonghyun oppa who will get me candies, chocolates and flowers all the time.”

“I will marry Jonghoon ajeossi when I grow up ummappa.”

“You cannot marry him Minki.”

“I will marry Jongin then.”

“You cannot marry him also.”

“I will marry Sehun then.”

“Eh? Who is this Sehun?”

“Oppa he is the boy next door. He is four.” Soo reminded me with glee.

“Thehun with the lithp?” I asked.

Everyone began laughing and Minki looked puzzled.

“No way! I don’t want two lispers to get married and give me double lisping grandchildren.”

“But ummappa I want to marry Sehun.”

“Why?”

“He is tute.” Her lisp showed up again.

“And?”

“He is tute.”

“Has Jonghyun met him?”

Minki nodded.

“What did he say?”

“Ajeossi said he is tute.”

“I will need to talk to him to make sure he does not call any more boys ‘cute’.”

Everyone at the table began laughing except Minki and me.

“How come I didn’t know about this before now?”

Soo and Jiyeon explained it to me, “They both play sometimes while you are tutoring Seul-ki. He also comes out to admire Jjong oppa’s bike and get to ride on it too. Oppa said he wanted to surprise you with a readymade son-in-law. Don’t worry he also said he will do a background check on the boy and his family.”

I nodded in satisfaction. I knew I could depend on puppy to look after Minki.

Minki came to uncle and asked, “Imobu-harabeoji, what is backgrown check?”

Uncle answered her with a straight face, “It is when you check the ground in the back so you and Sehun can play.”

She beamed at all of us.

She went off with Soo and Jiyeon to bathe and go to bed. Imo and I quickly cleared the table and left the dishes to wash later.

I was curious what imobu had found about my request. I had wanted to know about divorcing Minho.

“Jinki, legally you and Minho are not married, you were only co-habiting. Dae Hei it means living together. Since your marriage was not legal Jinki, there is no question of a divorce. But you did marry through a religious ceremony. Now that’s the tricky part and very confusing. Since you and Taemin are the only publicly married gays in South Korea, there are no laws or rules that apply to both of you. If you speak from the religious point of you, every religion is against gay marriage. So basically your marriage to Minho is neither legally nor religiously valid.”

“However, he can legally claim custody of Minki anytime he wants as he is her biological father. You did carry Minki but you do not have any genetic link to her. At most you can only be considered a surrogate from the legal point of view. Do you want to start custody proceedings for Minki?”

“No uncle. I don’t think it will be necessary. All it will do is generate negative publicity and social problems for Minki. Knowing Minho and his family they would have no interest in taking care of Minki at all, she would just be considered a financial burden to them. We will take legal action if and when the time comes.”

Both imo and uncle nodded at that.

“Are you sure that you want Soo and Jiyeon living with two gay men who cannot be considered legally married? If my seven years with Minho were nothing but living together, than that means even Jjong and I cannot be considered married, unless the laws or religions change.”

“I know you are confused and unhappy about the invalidity of your marriage to Minho but don’t start spouting nonsense. If we were such a narrow-minded family, we wouldn’t have invited you and Jonghyun to stay here permanently.”

“Uncle it’s not about your being narrow-minded. It’s the society and the people out there. It might become difficult to find good husbands for Soo and Jiyeon. And I am not unhappy about my first marriage being invalid. I am just concerned about the mess the whole thing is in. I will discuss this with puppy too and let’s see what he says.”

“I don’t want Soo and Jiyeon to marry narrow-minded persons. Whoever they marry has to accept you, Jonghyun and Minki. Do you want Daewon-ssi to be aware of this?”

“No uncle. For now let’s keep it under wraps. Let Jonghyun respond first. Plus, I think appa already knows whatever you just told me.”

“Ok. Whatever you both decide, we will be with you.”

I nodded. Imo and I quickly cleaned up the kitchen. Uncle wanted to help but we sent him to off to watch news.

I took Minki to sleep with me. Minki wanted to le but I wanted her to stop the habit. She pouted and then asked to just let her see my . I opened my shirt to let her see and she was quick as lightning to latch on to the with . She hung on to it with her teeth without actually biting me. Finally, I gave up trying to detach her and just let her le me. “Brat this is cheating and lying. You will not be able to fool me next time.”

She just moved her eyes up to look at me, smiled and continued ling.

As usual puppy called. I had missed him at dinner. His mother’s fever had broken and his father had thanked for the dinner. “What are you and Minki doing?”

“I am trying to sleep and she is being a lying brat.”

“Is she ling you again?”

“Yes.”

“I want to watch.”

“P.”

“Always, for you.”

“What is so interesting about it anyway?”

“I want to see your face. I have this image of you looking like Madonna at this moment.”

“Me look like Mother Mary with baby Jesus? You have weird imagination.”

“When will you comfort me like that yeobo?”

“I don’t think she is doing it for comfort, it seems to be turning into a before-sleep ritual and habit.”

“When will you let me fall asleep like that?”

“Hush puppy.”

“The way you make me feel, you really , you knock me off my feet.”

“Stop singing this song.”

“Why, it’s true. Does it make you hot? I saw the way you looked at me the other night when your brother danced around your brother-in-law.”

“Puppy, Minki is listening.”

“If I know her at all, she would be sleeping by now.”

I looked and he was right. She was asleep, beginning to relax around my . Yoda puppy.

“Don’t button your shirt yeobo. Just think I am on the other side of Minki, watching you. Waiting for my turn to kiss your chest and your s.”

“Jonghyun don’t do this please.”

“Why? Are you as as I am?”

“Why tonight? You have never spoken this way before. I already missed you at dinner.”

“I am missing you so damn much yeobo. The thought of your s has been driving me crazy every night. I want you so much. It is difficult to sleep without you nowadays. Please tell me I am not alone in this desire.”

“You’re not.”

“I’ve never felt so in love before. Promise toki you’ll love me forever more. I swear I’m keeping you satisfied, ’cause you’re the one for me. The way you make me feel, you really . You knock me off my feet. My lonely days are gone.”

“Jonghyun.”

“Yes yeobo. I want you to call my name in that breathy, needy voice when I am next to you. I want to hear you say my name like that all night long as we make sweet hot love.”

“Uncle wants you to shift in with us here. Think it over and let me know the answer.”

“Will I share a room with you?”

“Yes.”

“Stop turning a simple word into pure . If you want to sleep alone tonight, then you need to stop .”

“A word?

“A look yeobo.”

“Soon. Very soon. Have patience till then. My parents and family will be coming for dinner tomorrow. Uncle has asked for you to be present too.”

“I will come over as usual in the evening, after work. Text me if imo wants me to pick up something from the market on the way home. Should I bring flowers for umma?”

“You’ll be here to greet them so leave out the flowers. Something for Jongin maybe. Are you off day after or your schedule has changed?”

“Off. Do you want something special yeobo?”

“You.”

“And how do you want me?”

“I will tell you tomorrow.”

I blew him a kiss and ended the call.

I needed a cold shower.