Can I Eat Them Since They're Dead?

Suicide Notes

Day Twenty-Seven


~ 블락비 ~

I woke up to the sound of shrieking. I tried going back to sleep but it was impossible. Now that I'm awake I can't go back to sleep. "Augh... I can't even sleep in peace..." I sat up and stared ahead for several seconds, allowing myself to get used to the change in brightness.

I adverted my gaze to the door. Should I leave and see who decided to be my alarm clock for the day...? Sure, why not. I have nothing better to do anyways.

As I opened my door, some unfortunate person ran into it. Quite hard I might add. "I'm oww!!"

I walked around my door to find U-Kwon on the ground rubbing his head. "Are you... okay?"

U-Kwon looked up at me. "I think so... It hurts though..."

"As it should... But other than that, how are you this fine morning?" I yawned.

"Uh... Uhm... I..." U-Kwon looked from side to side. I raised my eyebrow at him wondering why he looked so suspicious. "I didn't do it!!" U-Kwon then ran off.

"I never said you did anything..." I mumbled. I shrugged and made my way down to the bathroom. On the way I saw Taeil sitting outside of his room. Is that a dark, depressing aura I see surrounding him?

I walked closer to him and I swear, the air got thicker and thicker and more gloomy. Taeil sat on the ground mumbling incoherantly.

"Taeil...?" I tried to get a look at his face. He looked up and I saw tears streaming down his face. I'll leave out the details about snot running from his nose as well.

"J-Jaehyo..." He said weakly.

"Yes?" I shouldn't have stopped to talk to him. I still need to pee pee. Wo yao pee pee. Ni gei wo pee pee ma? Wait... What the hell did I just say? 'I need pee pee. You give me pee pee' makes no sense...

"Who c-could be so cruel?" Taeil looked back down on the ground.

"What happened?" I started fidgeting in my spot. Still need to pee~

"S-someone... Someone..." Taeil began to say. "Someone..."

"Someone... What?" I asked impatiently. I'm gonna piss my pants any moment damn it. I shouldn't have drank all that soda last night.

"They..." Taeil began sniffling again. He then pointed at the door to his room.

I guess it's safe to assume he wants me to go in his room. Sorry bladder, you're going to have to wait. Dear God, I have sinned. I have caused pain to others. Please forgive me for slowly murdering my bladder.

I opened the door and walked into Taeil's room. "Why is it so dark in here?" I moved my hand along the wall looking for the light switch. When I found it I turned it on and found the room to be... exactly the same as it was the last time I was in here. There's nothing wrong with the room right? Either that or I'm blind. "Taeil? What happened?"

"I don't know!" He wailed. "They were like that when I came back to my room after breakfast!"

"They?" I gave him a weird look.

"M-my... My Donghaes!" Taeil began bawling on the ground.

"What the hell are you talking about?!" I sighed at him. He pointed across the room to his fish tank. Oh! Donghaes. Okay I get it now. The fish in the tank were dead fishies now. "What happened to your fish?"

"I don't know! I found them like that..." Taeil crawled over to his bed and climbed under the sheets. "On the way out, could you close the lights for me? I can't stand to look at them... My poor babies. You were all so young..."

"'Close the light?' Okay, whatever floats your boat." I shrugged as I left the room. When I turned off the light and shut the door I stood there motionlessly. What was I in the middle of doing...?

"A, B, C, D, E, F, G!" I heard a voice sing. "H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P~"

Oh I remember now! I needs to pee pee. I ran to the bathroom and knocked over P.O, the one singing, by accident.

"Thanks P.O!" I continued running.

"For what?" He sat on the ground giving me a weird look. Silly P.O, had it not been for you my bladder would have exploded already. May God bless you and give you a better life than what you have now.

~~~~~

I came out of the bathroom after doing my business and sighed happily. "I'm sorry you had to experiance that, oh dear bladder. You can blame Taeil."

I walked down then hall towards the cafeteria, which was past Taeil's room. As I walked by, I saw dark rays radiating off from the room. Is that normal...? I wonder who killed his fishies.

"What are you doing Jaehyo?" I saw U-Kwon walking towards me.

"Taeil is depressed." I stated.

"O-oh, is he?" U-Kwon looked around. "I wonder why..."

I stared at U-Kwon. "You did it didn't you?"

"I didn't mean to!!" He wailed and clung onto my arm.

"What the hell are you doing? Get off!" I tried shoving U-Kwon off.

"It was an accident!!"

All of a sudden, Taeil's door opened and he stared at us. "What are you guys doing? You're so loud. Can't I be emo in peace?"

"Tell him." I successfully pushed U-Kwon off of my arm, causing him to tumble into Taeil's direction.

"Tell me what?" Taeil asked as he moved to the side so U-Kwon fell to the ground.

U-Kwon bit his lip as he looked up at Taeil. "I'm the one that did it."

"Did what?" Taeil pulled U-Kwon up from the ground.

"I killed your fish..." U-Kwon mumbled.

"What? Why would you do that?" Taeil frowned at U-Kwon.

"I didn't mean to..." U-Kwon began to tear up. "I was eating Zico's candy when I went in your room to watch the fish. They looked hungry so I decided to give them some..."

"That stuff has crack in it. Why would you give them to my fish?" Taeil sighed.

"I forgot..." U-Kwon rubbed the back of his head.

"Wait, hold up. This has crack in it?" I asked.

"You didn't know?" Taeil gaped at me.

"I thought it was just regular candy!"

Taeil sighed. "Well now you know." Taeil then looked at U-Kwon as there was awkward silence.

"Sorry TaeTae..." U-Kwon looked at the ground. "I didn't mean to do that..."

Taeil sighed again. "I-It's okay. I forgive you..."

"So like... Can I eat them since they're dead?" P.O appeared out of nowhere and took out a bottle of hot sauce from... I'm not sure where he pulled that out from actually.

Taeil gave him a horrified look. "No! I need to bury them!"

P.O pouted. "Fine..."

Taeil scooped each fish out individually and placed them in a cup.

"...Just one bite?"

"No!" Taeil glared at him as he pouted some more.

"But they're just gonna be useless if they laid there buried! At least they could make themselves useful by letting me eat them. If you can't be useful, you're useless."

"How useful can dead goldfish be?" I asked.

"They're guppies, not goldfish!" Taeil said before leaving the room with his fish.

"...Let's go." P.O said before going after Taeil. "I'll take them when he's not looking."




~ 블락비 ~


I made it to over 3000 views and 100 subscribers!! ^^ Thanks to notyoungmonster for being my 100th subscriber!!~ :D

Comments are glady accepted~ :D winkwink.
Just ring a ding, ring a ding, ring a dong dong~ MYNAME <3 We ain't no stop :D lol

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NoLimitxInfinite
ok, so I hid ch. 19 & 20 (the play) since there was offensive material. I meant to do this sooner, but I haven't gone on AFF in forever. So I'll edit 'em later

Comments

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ExtremeACRepairman
#1
Chapter 53: This is really great
3VIP2BESTFRIEND
#2
I just wanted to say that I love this story to bits. I first found this story almost 4 years ago when I didnt have an account. I read the whole thing in 2 days and it was SOOOOOO funny! Ive almost never been on this site since 2012 and honestly, this is the only story I remember so well. This is some really good work and I'm glad you shared it with us.
CoolJirl
#3
When i first read this fic i didn't have enough points to upvote it. And now i do. Good thing i found it again. This is one of my favorite stories and what made me get into crack fics ^^
Kkomaenggi
#4
Chapter 48: fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuccckkkkk !!!! someone should make an anime/cartoon of this story! like seriously I could totally see this happen in a cartoon omg it was hilarious though I loved it!! but that ending though xD that was something I kept thinking the entire story, I mean ghosts demons and ing rainbow monkeys?? xD LOL seriously awesome you deserve a prize
looshyhooshy #5
Chapter 48: I liked this story and being just a dream make sense for all that weird things that happen!!
A story for INFINITE .. I'm sooooo gonna read it <3
Fighting!! ..
looshyhooshy #6
Chapter 44: I knew he "Taeil" would try to commit suicide or something but I didn't think that you're really gonna kill him ..
I mean u killed hanhae once but u brought him back .. but this time is different!! :/
I'm really sad for him ..
it was weird already since he asked jaehyo that time when they braught hanhae " what would u do if I dided?! " ..!!
looshyhooshy #7
Chapter 16: This story is really funny and weird .. I liked it ;)
Wishing tp know why jaehyo tried to commit suicide ..
bit here at this chapter .. I so u wrote muhammed!!
Do u mean our prophet mohammed?! :/
CoolJirl
#8
Chapter 27: I love this story. Cracks me up everytime. But still don't get the mino reference :( sorry. Can someone tell me?
Amira5
#9
Chapter 12: "I was afraid his ugliness might have caused my face to be less beautiful. Oh ho, I am so silly. Why on earth would I be less beautiful? I am Ahn Jaehyo after all. Nothing will cause me to become hideous."
This line!!!!! XDDD
KawaiiMaria
#10
Chapter 48: This was the best and really funny, that was a shocking plot twist. I really like this story.