The next week were one of the happiest of my life.

My friends and I was together all the time despite at night. I lied to my fiance that I had to work overtime for a week (he never really cared for my friends) and we just had fun.

Even though I said that I left Kpop as a fandom behind (both because of Dongmin and afterward just to survive while working with it) it was hard not acting like a crazy person when they did.

It was like the year apart hadn't existed, like we never had separated and I though that that was what real friendship was about, that you could not see each other for a long time but still be connected and still be able to pick that connection up when you met again.

When my foot was completely healed I showed them my bicycling-skills. They both clapped enthusiastic while Jonghyun stood beside biting his nails, looking nervous as hell.

We didn't spend that much time with Jonghyun, Yonghwa or Shinee. Or any other people. I just wanted to be with the two of them all the time and they seemed to prefer fangirling on a distance than approach them and embarrass them selves.

A week went by fast and they had to become.

“Well, we visit soon again,” Byuntae said as I was about to leave them at the airport.

“You better,” I said feeling the tears burning in my eyes.

“Well, If I got Jonghyun right we might will be able to come back to work,” Bongcha said and adjusted her backpack.

“He said?”

“Yes. He didn't even ask what we was doing...” Bongcha looked at me. “He must really care about you,” she said.

“It would be wonderful if you could come back and stay,” I said doing everything in my power not to cry.

The speakers called. “We gotta go,” Byuntae said. We all hugged a last time. “We'll see you again soon.”

I couldn't talk so I just nodded, and then they turned and walked away.

I hadn't realize it would hurt that much. I felt how I completely broke down at the inside as I saw their backs leave the hall and proceed through an other corridor, away from me.

Why couldn't you stay? I though using all the power I had to not fall down on my knees. We could have lived together... Just being safe and happy together...

The lump in the throat I had swallowed several times rose to my head and I didn't fight back the tears, they fell, striking my cheeks and dripping on my jacket.

It felt like I was... Nothing anymore. When they walked away they brought a big part of me with them, and I felt lost.

I stood there for a long time. Then I turned and walked back from were I had come.

The hall was pretty empty, but when I had walked a few steps I suddenly realized Jonghyun was standing at the other end.

When I saw him I stopped. He wore a green autumn jacket and a mild concern in his eyes.

He started proceeding towards me. He stopped a few meters away from me, looking at me.

“Why... Why are you here?” I asked him.

He suddenly took up the notebook and held it opened on the page which said “Being alone”.

“I though I could start working on that point immediately,” he said and put it back into his pocket. “I brought you some chocolate and I though...”

He couldn't finish because I interrupted him by throwing myself in his arms. I hugged him really tight and after a moment he hugged back.

“Thank you,” I cried into his chest. “Thank you.”