CHAP 27: HELPLESS……

Many days have passed since that horrible accident. Kevin has finally got back to normal life doing normal things like studying, hanging out with friends… But the only thing that hasn’t back to normal is his relationship with Eli. He still loves Eli a lot. And Eli loves him too. He is willing to wait until Kevin is ready and overcomes his fear. Sadly, the situation hasn’t made any progress. Between them are only simple conversations and unsuccessful handholds.

Kevin doesn’t want things turn out that way but every time, Eli comes closer to him and tends to hold his hands and kiss him, Kevin’s delicate mind immediately wanders to the moment those terrible monsters laid a hand on him. He still feels the disgust from those touches. Somehow his mind is suffering from a battle made by itself. Partly it says that his body is too dirty for Eli and his boyfriend deserves someone purer than him. But the other part says that Eli is waiting for him and he deserves more positive reactions from Kevin.

Each second that passes in Kevin’s life is each moment he struggles with his own conscience. Gradually he becomes even more frightened and exhausted. In the end, he just pushes his love away making the distance between them even further and further. He hates that and he is totally aware of Eli being painful to see that. Because Kevin himself feels that pain too. However his stupid weakness always prevents him from overcome his fear and obsession.

Kevin hates himself more when he always tells himself to keep on trying to be normal again. But all he sees is his boyfriend’s endless attempt to get closer to him and his miserable failure when being pushed away by Kevin. They both know that time will heal everything as long as they never give up. But time won’t fix anything when only one of them puts efforts and the other is still hiding in his shell living on without efforts.     

The sun has risen signaling the start of another boring and tiring day. Kevin nonchalantly walks on the corridor to his class. Suddenly his phone rings. It is a new message from an anonymous. Kevin slowly opens the message which makes him drop his jaw a second after that.

“Kevin, you dirty . You don’t deserve Eli.”

Those words hit his eyes badly as well as his mind. It is like a sharp knife stabbing deeply into his already broken heart. It is like salt with hot pepper rubbing his severe wound. Hurt. It hurts so much. It hurts to death. But what can Kevin do right now? Nothing. He even doesn’t know how to react from this. He doesn’t know who sends that message to him. Because of that, he can’t blame anyone on this. Honestly to himself, Kevin finds it partly true. So he just keeps silence. Putting his phone back to his bag, Kevin ignores it as if it never exists. Maybe it is the best way to overcome this.

Taking back his normal look, Kevin resumes his walk to the classroom. He puts on his best face saying “hi” to some friends going past him. But all he receives is the cold stares from them. He doesn’t know why and doesn’t care about that though. Human is a complicated creature and he won’t spend his time to discover that problem. He just needs to focus on his own life. It’s the best for him right now.

But life is full of the unexpected. Kevin wants to live his life simply. But it doesn’t mean that others will let him do what he wants. He takes a step into the classroom and is quickly greeted by some weird sentences.

“He’s coming!”

“He’s here!”

“The main character has finally showed up!”

He doesn’t know what he has done. But soon he finds out the reason. Following the direction of his classmates’ eyes, Kevin easily catches up what is going on. It is the black board that contains a sentence. It was written really big and legible in colorful chalk. There is no one that can’t read it when coming in this class, including Kevin.

“Always at your service at nights, disreputable e, Kevin.”

The message this morning is believed to be the most painful thing Kevin has ever read. But guess that he was wrong. This is unbearable. Kevin stands there facing the cold board hearing sneers from his classmate. He is numb now. This world is so cruel. The people who wrote this are cruel. The students who read this and misunderstand him are cruel. He is wondering how many percent they know him to judge him like that. He admits that he’s not pure or clean. But he didn’t do anything wrong to be treated this way. That accident has hurt him so much. And they don’t even know about that. So how could they say those things so heartlessly?

Sinking in his deep thoughts, Kevin is woken up by a strong shake. He turns around to see a frightened face of Dongho.

“Those words may be written on every board in every classroom…” Dongho is panting heavily. He must be really worried and angry. His expressions show that all.

“I’ll go check the other classes…” he says then runs away.

Kevin smiles bitterly. At least Dongho is always by his side. Of course Kevin has told Dongho about everything, including that accident and his relationship with Eli. And Dongho is willing to support him with all his might. He is definitely his best friend no matter what. Unlike those people. They were always nice to Kevin when he’s still useful for them. But now, they just throw disgusting eyes at him, just like he’s really a e or something like that.

A thought of explaining to them flashes through Kevin’s mind. But it quickly disappears. There is no need to say anything to those people. It will end up nothing and the situation may get worse. Considering that ignoring them is a better choice, Kevin heavily takes some steps toward the board. Cleaning the board is necessary, isn’t it? He doesn’t want to get any attention from his teachers. 

In a classroom, the door suddenly opens. Eli rushes into the room. He quickly takes a glance at the black board then grabs the duster cloth to clean the board. There must be a reason for his action. Simply a sentence was written enormously.

“Kevin Woo, lascivious guy.”

Eli must read a similar message on his classroom’s board so he is definitely going to check other classes. As expected, some words like those were written all over every board in this school. And Eli is doing that same thing in every class he comes into. Anger is swallowing him with an incredible pace. He can’t open the door properly. He just kicks them open then fiercely cleans the boards. He harshly yells at anyone asking about what he is doing. He violently pushes everyone on his way. With his state right now, it is sure that he could kill someone.

Meanwhile Kevin slowly approaches the board. It is a good thing that he can ignore the hateful looks from his classmates. But still each step he takes gives him a feeling of walking on millions of splinters of glass. Finally the short distance which seems longer than the border of Russia is over. Kevin is standing in front the board picking up the cloth. In this distance, the big size and colorful decoration of the sentence hurt his eyes a little. But what hurts more is the meaning of the words. Standing at this point, it is just like giving Kevin a better view of the words, as well as their meaning.

Putting the cloth on the cold surface, he starts to clean it. Suddenly he hears a loud noise. From behind the door, a flaming Eli is revealed. He runs to Kevin taking the cloth from the boy’s hand. He begins cleaning and cleaning till there is no sign of the existence of that message. After finishing that, he turns around to face the class. Kicking the teacher’s table violently, he throws the dirty cloth to the ground, or to be exact it hits someone’s body then drops to the ground. The whole class looks at him even more fearfully because they have already got terrified the moment Eli stepped into this room.

“Who did this?” he yells making some students standing near him take many steps backwards.

“Who dare bully my boyfriend?” his voice echoes over the room.

“Listen carefully!” he demands looking around to threaten everyone.

“If anyone dares do that this again, I won’t leave that person in peace even it is a girl.” His death glare shots each person in the room.

“No matter what happens, I will always protect Kevin!” he screams his lung out. His blond silky hair is tossed in the air as his anger reaches its limit.

“Come with me.” Eli says grabbing Kevin’s hand. Not letting him have time to react, Eli pulls him out of the room in front his shocked classmates.

A/N: Sorry for not updating for a while *bow*

Tell me what you think about this chap, plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyone tells me how to link another page?? LIke I asked for review from a review shop, I want to link that review in the foreword but I don't know how TT^TT please show me. Tks a lot :))))

Another question!~~~

Which poster do you think that is better for this fic???? I made two but I dont know which to choose coz they are not very different >""<

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