[Sol Han Na’s POV]

One week later.

“Ahhh! I’m so nervous!” Sehun said as he ran around screaming inside the dressing room. We’re currently inside the SBS Building and in a few minutes the music show’s about to start... and so is EXO’s comeback. 

“Calm down, Sehun. All of us are nervous. Don’t run around. You’ll only get us into more trouble if you become injured,” Suho scolded, sitting rather stiffly on the dressing room’s couch. 

“I can’t believe it’s really happening,” Lay said as the stylist applied the finishing touches to his make-up. His face, as reflected in the mirror, only shows how nervous and amused he is at the same time.

“You guys ready?” Manager Song spoke, her head poking on the dressing room door. 

“Yes, Ma’am!” the boys yelled in unison. 

Sensing the members’ hesitance, Manager entered the room. “Ya, why are you all sounding so down? Where’s the confidence?”

“We’re just really nervous, Manager,” Tao spoke, his lips already pouted.

“Oh, come on! You can do it! You practiced so hard for this, remember? Everything will be okay. You’ll stand on the stage. You’ll perform. And Han Na and I will be there to watch and cheer you guys on. You understand?” she said like an expert. The boys gloomy faces suddenly brighten up a bit.

“Okay, let’s do this!” Chanyeol said, flexing his neck and throwing some punches in the air like a boxer. 

“Everybody gather around!” Manager ordered. She added after noticing that I wasn’t moving, “Han Na, come on!”

I walked in on their circle and placed my hand on top of the boys’. Manager counted, “One... Two...Three...”

“FIGHTING!” we yelled as we raised our hands high above our heads. The boys clapped and began shouting cheers to one another. I decided to give them a round of goodlucks before I leave. 

“Goodluck, oppa!” I said, hugging Xiumin tightly.

“You can do it!” I said to Sehun.

“Fighting, oppa!” I said to Kyungsoo, flashing him an “aja” sign.  

I stopped when I faced Baekhyun. 

It’s been a week since the last time we spoke - properly, for that matter. We still talk to one another but only under important circumstances. He stopped going to my room or even down at the kitchen at 3:00 AM every single day. He stopped joking around me, even looking at me. He began pretending like I was someone invisible or with a severe infectious disease. We would speak with each another but only long enough so that the members won’t notice that we’re avoiding one another. 

I still remember that night. I cried so hard that time I thought my lungs would collapse. I can still recall so clearly how he said those words, “Stay away from Taeyeon”, like it’s only yesterday. It was the most painful moment of my life. I understood everything then - he loves Taeyeon, he loves her so much that he doesn’t even want me going near her. 

I felt my heart ache again.

I fought down the pain I was feeling and managed to speak. “G-Goodluck, oppa,” I said as I immediately left the room, not even waiting for him to answer.

I went into the studio and looked for the coordinator just like how Manager Song instructed me to. I found her soon enough, sitting at the front row. We locked eyes and she immediately left, me replacing her on the seat. 

Manager Song and I planned this over a few days ago. I really wanted to watch a music show live for at least once in my life and Manager Song kindly granted me my wish. She told me this morning that our coordinator shall be reserving a seat for me and all I have to do is to look for her. Thankfully, Manager Song picked a great spot. I’m so near to the stage that the boys will surely see me from here. 

I gripped my light stick tightly as the show started. Group after group finished their performances and the crowds around me became wilder and wilder. At first, I was sitting on my place rather awkwardly but later on I began to catch up with the happenings. I even began participating in the fan chants, too.

I saw Manager Song emerge from the side of the studio and he nodded at me.

They’re next, I thought to myself.

And sure enough, everyone around me suddenly began standing on their feet. The cheers became even louder and fiercer. I stood up, too, afraid that the girl behind me might hit me with the light stick she was holding. I faced the stage and waited for the boys to appear.

The lights dimmed, making pure emphasis on the glow of the light sticks. The familiar intro of the song echoed in the room and soon came Tao’s voice. I began yelling even before I had the chance to notice.

The lights went back up again and now I can see the boys onstage. Six of them, just like how they rehearsed over and over. I’ve watched them practice for so many times that every movement of theirs became utterly familiar to me. I screamed my lungs out. 

The cheers were so amazing and the fan chants always on point, that I cannot help but just ride along with it like an actual fan. I felt like I was in cloud nine.

The boys and I exchanged glances time after time and I made sure that I would cheer so hard for them whenever they looked at me. 

The performance reached the bridge and all twelve of them are already onstage. I suddenly felt a jolt of pride wash through me. 

Those are my boys. They’re like the elder brothers I never had. They are my second family, I thought to myself.

I was so caught up on my emotions that I didn’t even notice that my eyes were glued on Baekhyun until he looked at me and our gazes locked. I froze. They’re currently on the part where the four of them - Luhan, Suho, Chen, and him - have their solos. He stared at me as he sang his line. I almost fell back on my seat. It was the first time in almost seven days that he looked at me.A sudden feeling of emptiness shot through me. Seven days have been quite a long time and up until now had I only realized