PROLOGUE

[Sol Han Na’s POV]

I boarded the van with an unconscious mind.

I could hear Ms. Kim talking to me from her seat but I can’t seem to formulate any words to answer her.

“Where should we take you, Hanna?” she asked over and over but I kept my eyes closed and remained silent. Baekhyun and Taeyeon are still outside and I can’t bear to see them – I can’t risk my heart from further breaking anymore.

I heard Ms. Kim turn to Mr. Kang in worry, “Why is she being like this?”

Mr. Kang, my driver, has always known the truth between Baekhyun and I. He’s been there since the day I’ve confirmed my feelings for Baekhyun. He even congratulated me when the two of us finally became official. And now, it’s quite funny to think that he’s still here to witness us breaking up.

“I think we should take her away from here, Miss,” he whispered in reply.

“And take her where?” Ms. Kim snapped. I’ve never heard her sound so mad. “Ji Hye ordered me to bring her home. This is her home.”

No, I wanted to tell her. This is not my home. My home’s in Jeju. Take me there. Take me back to my family.

“Let’s just bring her to their house. It’s not good for her to be here,” Mr. Kang answered and he sounded so sure Ms. Kim didn’t argue anymore.

The van vibrated to life and I felt us slowly drive away. Relief washed over me. I know they’re not taking me to Jeju, they’re taking me to Myungsoo and I’s house, but I’d rather be there than here. I’ve got nowhere else to go, anyway.  

Mr. Kang sped off on the street. We arrived at our house quick and I left the van without a word. I kept my silence as I headed towards our condominium unit that is on the fourth floor of the building, Ms. Kim and Mr. Kang trailing silently behind me.

I keyed in the door’s password and pushed it open.

“Han---“ Ms. Kim was about to say but I closed the door shut before her. I know it’s rude, considering she’s older and my senior, but I am in no mood right now to even think about manners.

My hands tightened around the door’s handle.

I could hear Ms. Kim and Mr. Kang arguing outside. Mr. Kang is insisting on leaving me to give me space but Ms. Kim is firm that it’s dangerous for me to be left alone.

It was only a matter of time when exhaustion finally got the best of me. My knees gave way and I fell on the floor. Too tired to hold the emotions in, I let myself burst out.

It was a silent cry at first, the one where your tears would fall slowly – no sounds can be heard. Then as Baekhyun and Taeyeon’s kissing images filled my head, I broke out into an awful whimper; an awful sob; and an awful cry.

I leaned my back against the wall, right beside the door, and pressed my forehead against my knees. I cried and cried and let all my feelings out. I felt hurt, broken, miserable, and betrayed. But above all, I felt guilty. Because I know it’s my fault why this happened – I must have done something to make Baekhyun change his mind and turn away from me. And for me that is the saddest part, that until the end I can’t still bear to put the blame on him. I love him too much it makes me unable to see his flaws.

Moments passed by and I could still hear Ms. Kim and Mr. Kang outside. Ms. Kim knocked on the door and even rang the bell countless times but I didn’t budge. I want to be alone, why can’t they understand that?

I looked up and stared at the clock across from me. I watched as the seconds ticked by. Time doesn’t seem to matter to me now that Baekhyun’s gone. Normally, I would have been too excited to see him. I would start counting down and feel so giddy for 2:00 AM to come because that’s the time he’d transfer to my room to meet me. From now on, it’s nothing more than just a painful memory.

It was already past 10:00 in the evening, when Ms. Kim and Mr. Kang left. They have waited outside for a full hour and must’ve decided to just give up. I can’t blame them. I asked Baekhyun to give me an hour but he failed and decided to hook up with another girl. How could they be any different?

“We’ll get going, Hanna,” I heard Ms. Kim spoke, sounding so down and worried. “Don’t do anything rash, okay? We’re leaving.”

And they did.

I laughed bitterly.

One hour, I thought. I asked him to wait for me for an hour but he didn’t. How can an hour be too long? It’s just like watching an episode of a drama or listening to fifteen songs. He can endure sitting in front the mirror while his stylist preps him up and never get tired of it.  He can shoot music videos overnight and still feel good about it. But why can’t he wait for me for just a single hour? Was his love for me too shallow that waiting for sixty minutes would be very much difficult?

Tears burned my eyes again so I returned to bury my face in my knees. I felt so tired and utterly worn out. I was about to pass out on the floor when I heard the door beep and someone stepped in.

There was a sharp intake of breath.

“Hanna?” a familiar voice suddenly called out.

//

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