Alright lovers! Take a deep breath and.......read!

I stare at Chaerin blankly while she stare at me with guilt. Our eyes are swollen from too much crying. She lean against the wall in front of me. Her lips are moving, wanted to say something but her voice didn't come out. After thirty minutes, she stepped out of the bathroom with messy hair and her eyes redden. She look devastated. I have never seen her this way. Never. I am sure that 'thing' with her royal family has completely weaken her. I don't know if I should be mad because she shut me out half an hour ago or should I run to her and comfort her? I don't wanna be selfish so I'm waiting for her to say something but she is still silent.

She scooped her face and a heavy sighs released before she look away. Only then I noticed she's in tears again. I watched her biting her lips. Trying to stop her tears, I guess. She look really really hurt right now and that make me crying again. Baby.. Say something.

"I'm sorry." Finally, she speak up but that's not what I wanted to hear.

"I'm sure you know that..."

She cut me off. "If..." She paused and breath in deeply while her left hand wiping away her tears while looking outside the window. My heart sting when I watched her in this state. I wanted to hug her but I don't know why I can't even move and jump off this bed. All I'm doing is sitting here, waiting for her explanation.

"If...you finally know... Who... Who I really am, would you..still..love me the same?" Then she broke in tears again. It is so hard for her to speak up and ask me those question. And that question completely make me confused.

I wipe away my tears and nod my head even though she didn't look at my side. She seem afraid to look at me at this moment. "Of course baby. It doesn't matter who you really are. I love you for you. Because you."

She shake her head and finally have the courage to look at me. I saw her smiling at me, her painful smile. "What if you leave? What if you hate me after knowing who I really am? I've been hiding this for years. From everyone including you."

"I don't know what it is Chaerin but no matter what it was I won't leave you. I will never leave you."

"Even I... Hate myself every time I think about that..." She burst into tears, turning around to face the wall. She's sobbing, so badly. That made me running toward her and hug her tightly from behind.

"Tell me baby.. Let it all out.. I won't leave you. I promise." I beg between my sobs. I swear to God, it hurts so bad to watch her being like this. Someone who I always thought stronger than anything and anyone, someone who I thought will never show her emotions, her pains, and her tears finally broke down, in front of me. Her facade has broken and her true colors show. She is not as strong as she always showed people. This is her. This is Lee Chaerin.

"I need to confront him..." She said and punch the wall few times with her strong fist. Him..as in The King? She turn around and looking straight into my eyes. My heart cracked when her eyes met mine. There's so much pain and hatred in there that seem to destroyed her. I cupped her both cheeks and trying my best to smile but my tears keep falling down. I wipe her tears as she wipe mine.

"I'm with you. Always and forever. I don't know what's happening but I'm with you." I whisper, convincing her that I won't ever leave. Chaerin, how can I leave you? You're the one who gave me life. I don't care who you are in your past or whatever it is, I still want you. Only you. She kiss my forehead and then pulls me into her embrace. She hold me tightly inside her arms as if she wanted to let go all of the burden on her shoulder.

"I hate him. For everything.." She said and her embrace even tightening. I'm a little breathless but I didn't say a word instead I'm hugging her tightly too. I can feel her pain. I can feel her sorrow and it hurts. I kiss her shoulder trying to calm myself down and hoping for Chaerin to more and more to let go of everything that she feel, her hatred and her anger that she's been holding for years.

"Lee Ki Jin.. He's not my biological father.." And that make me push her away a little, to look at her face, to find out if she is kidding. But no. The pain is still shown clearly on her face which it mean it's true. My eyes widen in shock. Is this mean that Lee Woo Jin, Lee Harin and Mama Lin isn't her biological family? Was that mean she is just like Matt too? Is this why she and Matt close to each other?

"My real...father.." She paused. It seem hard for her to call him father especially to the person whom she just exclaimed she hated the most.

"He is the King of France. The last generation of Capetian Dynasty. The last French Monarchs. He is the King, the Emperor. He is Philip the 33rd of France."

I step backward. My heartbeat racing. Her voice when she talked about her father, it scared me. This is really bad. Her father must have done something that make her being like this even at the thought of him. I don't know what will happen if she finally meet him. But one fact, it still doesn't change the fact that Chaerin is still from the royalty. Chaerin is still the Queen for both France and Sinuiju.

"I... My precious... I can't..." She shake her head and cry again. "How..can I tell you about this. This...involved someone's pride and dignity. Someone who I really love, respect and adore in this world..."

"Baby.. Don't force yourself. You can tell me when you're ready."

"But I can't... You need to know this. I can't hide this away from you forever. You're my wife.. You have the right to know that.. I am.. An illegal daughter of Philip and... Mama Lin."

I fall to the floor. My knees completely weaken. I can't even feel my feet. My eyes widen and I'm froze. I hardly breath.

"I know.. I know. I told you, even I hate myself. I am disgusting with myself. I don't understand. Why. Why me? Why it has to be me?"

I couldn't say a word. I stare at the floor with thousand of mixed feelings. I really hope that right now, right at this moment the floor would swallow me deep under the ground. This secret that Chaerin just revealed make me speechless and I don't know how to response to Chaerin who keep being mad at herself. Blaming her father for everything. This is hard to believe. Mama Lin who I always respect, who I thought is holy... But who am I to judge? Everyone of us in this world indeed a sinner.

"Him, Papa Lee and Mama Lin they are bestfriend since high school but one day Philip made Mama Lin cheating behind Papa Lee while he is away. Papa Lee had to go back to Sinuiju because his father is sick. Mama Lin can't go with him because of Woo Jin. Papa Lee family has never approved of their marriage and that is why Woo Jin has never been accepted and welcomed to the Lee royalty family. Their marriage never been blessed by Papa Lee parents. But he loves her too much. Too much, Sandara until he decided to leave his family, his fame and all of his wealthy for her. And they run away to Paris while Mama Lin is pregnant of Woo Jin and seek for Philip help. He helped them with everything they needed because he is wealthy, he inherited all of his family assets and money wasn't a big deal for him because he is the only Prince of Philip the 32nd of France. He bought them house, he gave them money to build their new life. He gave them new life in Paris. They never know he help them because he want something big in return. One day, Papa Lee received a letter from his family and after three years running away from his home, from his kingdom he decided to go back and face his family but unfortunately no one ever thought that was the last time Mama Lin see him. He didn't go back to Paris. Mama Lin patiently waited for him to come back. One year. Two years and that's when it happened. Philip betrayed his own friend and lied to Mama Lin. He wrote a fake letter and pretended it was from Papa Lee. The letter says that Papa Lee will never come back to her which is a lie and Mama Lin believed that. While she is broken and tormented Philip seduced her. He give her love, he took care of her until she forget Papa Lee. Philip has it all planned since the first day they come to him and seek for his help. He's in love with her since high school but Mama Lin choose to be with Papa Lin. And..."

She breath in before she sit on the floor, facing me. She no longer crying but I can see how much it pain her when she reminiscing something that she really wanted to forget but she just can't. She was born with that tragedy running in her blood. That past just like a tattoo within her soul. I lift my head looking up at her. I feel sorry for what happened to her. God, why do You have to make her suffering this much? Why can't You give her happiness? Why do You have to always giving her Your greatest test? Don't You love her? This wasn't her fault why do You have to punish her for something that she didn't do? I reach for her hand and kiss it, longer, while crying. This thing only make me adore her more. Make me love her more and more. For being so strong. For over 30 years of her life. If I was in her shoes I'd probably kill myself long time ago. She caress my head and then plant a soft kiss above it.

"Can I continue?" Her voice are soft. I nod while resting my head above her lap and she lower her body to rest her chin above my head.

"When Woo Jin was 4 years old Mama Lin is pregnant.. Of me.." I wrapped my arms around her waist trying to comfort her because she sounded so damn hurt as she mentioned that. "Then something unexpected happened. Papa Lee appeared on their door and he was so hurt when he saw Mama Lin carrying me inside her tummy. They fought. Three of them. And the truth revealed. Papa Lee left her and Woo Jin but before he left, he told her something that make her realized Philip is not a human but the devil. The letter Papa Lee received back then was fake too and he found out it was all Philip deeds. She was so hurt and feel betrayed that she almost kill me. She almost abort me because she said I was a mistake of what Philip did and that I s