You pulled your glasses off and set them down on the table before burying your head in your hands. You’d loved writing when you could do it whenever you wanted, but having to write on command to meet deadlines was harder than you’d thought. It didn’t help that your head was swimming with thoughts of your boyfriend, who was still being sulky and ignoring you. All you wanted to put on paper were angry words to him, but you couldn’t bring yourself to be that unprofessional, especially when whatever you wrote was going to end up being his song. Besides, you’d made him promise earlier that he wasn’t going to write about you in this album because you didn’t want your relationship to be used as material for his lyrics, so that applied to you too.

It was difficult working with Yongguk now that your relationship was in this state. Clearly, when he’d made this arrangement, he hadn’t anticipated that the two of you might not be on good terms. Conversations were stilted, and because you were so mad at each other, you could never agree on anything, and it made the whole working environment really horrible for everyone else. Needing a change of scene, you’d escaped to the café near the office, where you were now nursing a giant cup of coffee. However, it seems putting distance between you and Yongguk didn’t make it any easier to stop thinking about him.

When you looked up again, someone was sitting across from you.

“Oh, Dongwoon ah,” you said, surprised. “You scared me.”

“I thought I saw you, but I couldn’t be sure,” he replied, grinning. He shook his head disapprovingly at you. “How can a model be seen in public without makeup?”

You scowled at him. “It’s a tough period at work,” you defended. You must have looked really sickly, with your pale skin and dark circles, but with all the recent events, you really didn’t have the energy to doll yourself up before going to work. “What are you doing here?”

“I just went for a casting around the corner and I thought I’d grab some coffee,” Dongwoon answered. “What are you doing here if you have to work?”

You gestured at the notebook you had in front of you. “I’m working. My office is just across the road.”

“Am I disturbing you?”

You shook your head. “No, I was just taking a break. You can sit here, if you want.”

He nodded, and leaned over to look at your lyrics. Then, thinking of something, he looked back up at you. “So, I was checking out your brother’s band, and correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t their leader, that Bang Yongguk, your first boyfriend? The crazy one who wouldn’t leave you alone when we were dating?”

You hesitated for a moment before nodding sheepishly. “Yeah, that’s him.”

“Isn’t it weird working with him, then?” Dongwoon asked, frowning. “Is he still crazy? I mean, is he still, like, hung up on you or something?”

Given the current circumstances, you were inclined to answer that he was indeed still crazy, but you felt defensive for some reason. “Actually, he’s still my boyfriend. We got back together.”

Dongwoon’s mouth fell open in a soundless gasp, and his expression alternated between shock and confusion. “Oh. I’m so sorry. I had no idea.”

“It’s okay,” you said with a smile.

“Fate works in mysterious ways,” Dongwoon mused. “I suppose he’s more open now that he’s an international star? No offense, but I always thought you’d end up with a foreigner because you’re way too independent and headstrong for Korean men.”

You gasped exaggeratedly. “I’m offended! Are you saying I’m unfeminine?”

Dongwoon laughed. “Maybe. I just remember you complaining a lot about how he was tying you down and controlling you too much, and I thought to myself that you’re a girl who’s meant to fly free. I never imagined you’d take Bang Yongguk back, but what do I know? I haven’t seen the man in years.”

You didn’t expect Dongwoon to like Yongguk. After all, when you were dating Dongwoon, Yongguk was the guy who was constantly trying to snatch you from him. The two of them had encountered each other several times when Dongwoon sent you home because Yongguk would wait outside your home trying to talk to you, and he was never friendly. That probably also explained why Yongguk hated Dongwoon’s guts too. Thinking about that, you sighed aloud.

“I don’t mean to judge him,” Dongwoon said quickly. “I could be wrong…”

“You’re not,” you interrupted him with a wry smile. “He’s still pretty… intense. Why else do you think I’m hiding here instead of sitting beside him in the office?”

Dongwoon was quiet for a moment. “Are you two having problems again?”

You debated internally whether to tell him. Yongguk wouldn’t be too happy for sure if he knew that you were confiding in the source of his unhappiness about your relationship problems, but you’d had it bottled up in your chest for so long you felt like you were about to burst. Because very few people knew you were dating Yongguk, the pool of people you could talk to was small. You couldn’t talk to the Secret girls because they were already troubled enough by the Hyosung saga, and you couldn’t talk to the boys because they were on Yongguk’s side. With Dongwoon in front of you looking sympathetic, you caved. “Yeah, we are. We had a huge fight because of the photoshoot.”

Dongwoon nodded, understanding. “Because of the exposure, or because of me?”

“Both.”

“Oh.”

“I don’t think I did anything wrong,” you told him. “I told him a million times it was just a job, but now he thinks I’m cheating on him. No matter how I try to explain, he doesn’t believe me.”

Dongwoon raised an eyebrow. “It seems he still has trust issues.”

You sighed, leaning back in your chair. “We have lots of issues. And it seems six years wasn’t enough for us to work things out.”

Dongwoon leaned forward, putting both his elbows on the table and looking thoughtful for a while. “If you don’t mind me asking… Why did you choose him again?”

“I felt…” you began, but frowned, a million thoughts running through your head. “I want to say love, but I’m not sure either of us fully understands the concept of love just yet. If love is as all-encompassing and all-consuming as literature suggests, then the fact that we can’t and won’t understand each other means we probably don’t love each other as much as we’d like to think.”

“Still as cynical as ever,” Dongwoon teased with a grin. “But I don’t suppose any intellectual conclusions about love actually come into play when this…” he placed his hand on the left side of his chest. “Tells you that you’re in love.”

You crossed your arms, remembering the poem you’d written for Yongguk. “The heart tells you a lot of things, but sometimes, the heart can be wrong.”

Dongwoon shrugged and sipped his coffee, introspective for a moment. From the corner of your eye, you saw two figures at the cashier, staring at you. You turned and saw that they were the maknaes, Jongup and Junhong. They were holding trays of takeout coffee, probably sent on the errand by the hyungs in the office. You waved at them and they looked at each other nervously before scurrying out of the café.

That night, when your doorbell sounded, you made sure to check the intercom to see who was outside. You’d changed the pass code so Yongguk couldn’t sneak into your bed again, but you just had to be sure. Seeing your brother deliberately shove his face close to the camera, you rolled your eyes and opened the door a few inches. Only when you were sure that he was alone did you swing the door open fully to let him in.

“I didn’t bring him,” Himchan said dryly as he entered, walking past you with two large paper bags. “Do you think I’m a Trojan horse?”

“Who knows?” you retorted, closing the door as he made himself comfortable on the couch. “You’re on his side, which makes you an enemy soldier.”

“Who says I’m on his side?” Himchan protested. “I’m not on any side. I’m Switzerland.”

You peeked into one of the paper bags that he’d brought. “What’s this?”

“Stuff the boys and I bought you from the States,” he said. He pushed forward the other bag, which was about the same size and equally filled. “This one is Yongguk’s. He didn’t wanna give it to you personally, so it had to be delivered through Swiss mail.”

You deliberately pushed aside Yongguk’s bag and dug through the first bag, eyes brightening at the cosmetics, snacks and all sorts of knick-knacks inside. You pulled a hoodie from the bag, but Himchan took it out of your hands and set both bags aside. “You can look at these later. Come, tell oppa what’s wrong.”

You pouted. “Hasn’t he already told you?”

“He has, but since I’m Switzerland, I’m going to let you tell your side of your story before I lecture… I mean, mediate.”

“You’re already assuming that I’m in the wrong.”

“No, I’m completely impartial,” Himchan insisted. “I think you’re both equally stupid and mule-headed.”

You sighed irritably. “How am I equally stupid when he’s the one who won’t see reason? He keeps insisting I’m cheating on him when I’m not. I don’t see how our conversation can go beyond this point if we can’t even agree on this.”

“See, both of you get so defensive every time you talk,” Himchan pointed out. “Your conversation can’t advance not because of what you’re talking about, but how you say it.”

You scowled, but had to admit grudgingly that maybe he was right.

“And did you not give him reason to believe you have something going on with Son Dongwoon?” Himchan chided. “You lied about the photoshoot—”

“I didn’t lie,” you interjected.

“Hid the truth,” Himchan corrected. “Same difference.” You opened your mouth to protest again, but he stopped you with a raised hand. “And did you not tell him that you were going to see Son Dongwoon before you hung up on him and rejected all his calls? How did you expect him to react?”

You sat back heavily, crossing your arms.

“Stop me if I’m saying anything wrong, since I’ve only heard his side of the story,” your brother challenged. “Aren’t you still in contact with that guy? Didn’t you leave the office to meet him yesterday and today?”

“That’s a misunderstanding,” you said, deflated. “I don’t know how it managed to happen so coincidentally, but I really was leaving the room to get coffee and he just happened to see Dongwoon calling me. But I wasn’t going to meet him. He called the wrong number.”

“And today?”

“How did he know that I met Dongwoon today?”

“Jongup and Junhong told us.”

“Enemy soldiers.”

“What were you thinking, meeting him right on our doorstep?” Himchan scolded. “Don’t you think Yongguk could have seen you? You know he’s already upset about you meeting this guy again and you still insist on doing it.”

“I know it’s hard to believe,” you admitted. “But I ran into him there. He just happened to be around the area. Besides, I don’t think I have anything to hide. He’s just a friend.”

Himchan frowned. “I’m glad you know it’s hard to believe. Imagine how he must be feeling, especially when you know he’s the jealous type. And he’s not ‘just a friend’ if he also comes with the tag of ‘ex-boyfriend’, does he? Remember that Yonggukkie was also your ex and you took him back.”

“He’s different,” you insisted. “Does he think I’m collecting my exes like strays?”

“Did you tell Yongguk how different he is from Dongwoon then?” he countered. “Instead of reassuring him that you love him, all you’ve been doing is accusing him of being crazy. I bet that’s really helpful when he’s comparing himself to Son Dongwoon, international model.”

You huffed sullenly. “He has been acting crazy. It’s not like he comes to me trying to start a normal conversation. He’s always just glaring angrily at me.”

“That’s why I say you’re both equally mule-headed,” Himchan said, getting to his feet. “I have to go to practice now, but you should think hard about this. Is your pride worth losing something you fought so hard to keep?”

You remained seated as your brother let himself out. He turned and stared intensely at you as he reached the door, tapping a finger to his temple. “Think about it.”

He was closing the door behind him when he poked his head back in, giggling. “I always wanted to do that.”