‘Sleep, I want to sleep.’ That was the only thing going through my mind right now. I had barely slept anything these past three days. Dad had left for Europe again; he was trying to get the company back up on its feet’s again. But that also meant that I would have to be alone with Soo Ni and her mother. So the past three days had been filled with screams and slamming cupboards and doors. Soo Ni’s mother had blamed all the things that had happened on me. That it was my fault dad’s company wasn’t working out.

I’d been too stressed out by everything that I couldn’t sleep, or when I actually managed to fall asleep I woke up a few minutes later. And for the first time in years those nightmares were coming back. It was the exact nightmare over and over again, playing in my mind. My mother’s accident, the one I witnessed with my own two eyes eight years ago.

It was summer and my mother and I were at the beach, the weather had been so-so, but for me that didn’t matter because I loved to swim and as long as it didn’t rain it was completely fine for me. Even though I know my mom had told me that we could go there another day. When thinking back now, I wished I’d listened to her. But I didn’t. Instead I headed out into the water. I can still remember how the water, which was a bit colder than usual, embraced my skin as I swam further out.

Smiling I’d watched how my mother entered the water as well, that pretty smile of hers was lighting up her face as she swam towards me. To me, my mother was the most beautiful woman. But everything changed so drastically. She disappeared under the surface all of a sudden, and when she came up again she was breathing harshly and her eyes shone with fear. It scared me because I’d never seen my mother so terrified.

I couldn’t do anything as she vanished once again under the surface. Though, she didn’t come up that time. It wasn’t until later that I understand what had happened. She’d gotten cramps and if it weren’t for that she had been in the water she would’ve made it. Ever since that I haven’t entered any kind of water. To tell the truth, I was terrified of water. It brought forward so many memories I wanted to forget. That’s also why I have troubles sleeping when dad leaves me, because I’m afraid that he won’t come back.

I tiredly watched the teacher speaking about something I couldn’t care less about. My eyes would fail on me once in a while only to snap open when Hoya nudged my side. I didn’t know if I should’ve been thankful for that or not. He was keeping me awake so that the teacher wouldn’t get mad, but still, he disturbed my sleep. The one I wanted so much.

Once the bell rang I placed my head down on the book as I fluttered my eyes close. I could finally get some sleep. I heaved a sigh as I slowly breathed in and out, my heart was slowing down. I could hear faint whispers far away talking, though my eyes snapped open instantly when I felt something poking my cheek.

In front me was Sung Yeol, he had bent down so that he was standing in my level, a huge he smile was plastered on his lips. I groaned inside my head before turning the other way. My eyes widened at the scene before me, Hoya had also placed his head against the desk, facing me. He grinned at me and I hastily closed my eyes. I could feel his intense gaze on me despite that my eyes were closed.

“Stop staring ert.” I murmured low, my eyes still closed as I tried to calm myself down. Why was he taking every opportunity to piss me off? “And what if I don’t?” I could literally hear the amusement in his voice as he spoke. I fluttered my eyes open and glared at him. If he wanted to play this game then fine, let’s play.

With a last look I pushed back my chair and stood up. I couldn’t get any sleep here so it was better to find some other place, even though I’m not too sure of where that would be. “Yah, where are you going?” Hoya’s voice met my ears, but I decided to just ignore him as I exited the classroom and headed down the hallway.

I made my way past a couple who were making out at the lockers, god this is a school, take that somewhere else. My search didn’t seem to work out the way I wanted and I ended up heading back to class, Hoya was probably going to laugh at me. But right now, I was too tired to actually care. And just like expected; I were greeted by a smirking Hoya. I closed my eyes, irritated over how childishly he was behaving. Seriously, was this middle school?

I slumped down on my seat as I told him to shut up, the two boys behind me chuckled, they too were amused, everyone but me. “Can you stop bothering me; I haven’t slept in three days.” I murmured as I once again let my head met the bench, my eyes closed as I slowly drifted off. Finally some sleep.

My eyes snapped open as I heard the loud sound of the school bell ringing loudly into hallways. How long had I been asleep? I slightly raised my head, only to see that something was shielding my face. It didn’t take many seconds before I finally noticed that it was a book standing and hiding my sleeping self from the teacher’s watching eyes. But I didn’t place it there. I tilted my head to the side confused.

“Finally, we thought you’d died or something.” I looked to the side and met Hoya’s piercing gaze. I blinked my eyes a few times, trying to readjust my eyes. “You placed it there?” I asked him as I referred to the book. He gave me a slight nod in acknowledge. My lips parted and I said a low thank you. It was the first time he actually did something nice.

After lifting my head completely from the bench I noticed that the school day was over. A sigh rolled of my tongue when the thought of having to go home entered my mind. Sungjong, maybe he wanted to do something. Suddenly I felt happy; maybe I wouldn’t have to go home just yet.

I turned my attention to Sung Yeol because I knew for a fact that Hoya would never tell me where Sungjong’s homeroom was. “Where’s Sungjong’s homeroom?” I blurted straight out without even giving him an explanation to why I wanted to know that. “Only if you kiss me first.” He smiled at me and I closed my eyes in annoyance before telling him no. “But we’ve already kissed two times, one more wouldn’t hurt.” I wanted to punch him after that he said that, did he truly have to say that.

“You’ve kissed two times?” Woohyun snickered and I bit my bottom lip so hard that I could almost feel my teeth’s piercing through the delicate skin, “yup.” Sung Yeol answered and I hissed at him to shut up. “Correction, he stole one on my first day here.” I corrected him; I didn’t want the other two to think I was some kissing machine.

“So can I have one?” Sung Yeol tried again and I rolled my eyes as I told him no, he was not going to get one more kiss. “Can I have one instead?” Woohyun continued as he winked. “No.” I stated firmly, “me then?” Hoya added on, seriously I was soon going to strangle them if they continued like this. “No, no and no. I’m not going to kiss any of you.” I stated as I grabbed my stuff before heading out of there. If they didn’t want to help then fine, I could find Sungjong’s homeroom on my own.

Right, it just took me half an hour due to students giving me the wrong room and then me getting lost. Hopefully he’d still be there. Something I doubted, but it wouldn’t hurt to look. Heaven must’ve heard my wish because he was seated at his desk. But he was all on his own; the whole classroom was emptied of students.

‘They all come from broken homes’. Those words repeated themselves inside my head; maybe he didn’t want to go home either. Maybe I actually had more in common with these guys than I first thought.