35 ★ Suddenly Tomorrow
The Star-Crossed Hearts
I open my drawer and my eyes fall on the red paperbag, the one which has a maroon colored shirt and a box of CD inside. It has stayed here for ten days already.
The conversation happened on his birthday still lingered in my mind. Honestly, even until now, I don't know if I should be happy or not because I could predict his answer.
After going through various attempts, the birthday present I prepared for Myungsoo is finally ready. The shirt is packed neatly and the special birthday greeting I made for him had also done in less than a week.
I chose twelve songs, mostly represented my feelings for him, but it's not what important. I collected those songs in one CD and I give along a lyrics book within the box.
In every song lyric, he would find a hidden message. At random part, I bold and underline a word and if he could arrange them all, there would be one wish in one song.
However in the last song, I don't put the same clue. There is no word in bold or underline. I changed all of the letters into small caps but if he arranged the letters in cap, he would find one honest statement from me.
"Sincerely with love"
Though Haemin convinced me that I should confess to him, it's just too difficult. After going through some considerations, I though this is more than enough.
He couldn't be that dense to notice that I gave him a birthday present by my own with a special birthday wishes then expect that I have nothing for him, right? I mean... at least he could feel something.
The problem is how can I give it to him. By person. Not by send it to his house or give it when we're with others; it will cause some gossips, I believe.
It's not that I haven't tried to ask him to come. His birthday fell on working day and I actually wanted him to meet up at a mall nearby from my office; it's somehow near from his house too.
I've told Jieul that it won't work. It would be impossible for me to give it to him on his birthday. We even did a scenario which is, according to Jieul, worth a try.
"Okay, let's pretend that I ask you to come. You are Myungsoo then," Jieul cleared . "I said happy birthday, you said thank you, and here we go. Hey, Myungsoo, are you busy after work today?"
"I will have dinner with my family," I answered with monotone. "He did have one last year. Remember that we asked him if he wanted to catch a movie with us on his birthday last year?"
"Fine," Jieul groaned. "Oh, right from the office? I have something to give you, you know. This will surely make him think twice!"
I raised my eyebrow, "Why don't you just give it when we meet up with the others? Thank you anyway."
"He wouldn't say that!" Jieul complained. "Ah! If we wait till that day, perhaps it would come to your hand next year!"
"Then he would answer, don't worry. we'll meet before that," I shrugged and crossed my arms. "That is the most possible conversation will happen between us. The end."
She convinced me to try and, I don't know if I should be happy or not, because on Myungsoo's birthday, that is the exact conversation happened between us; he really declined to meet up with me that day.
It felt... hurt? I mean it's obvious that I'm nothing of special if he doesn't want to do something for me. Or maybe it's just me exaggerating everything.
Jieul didn't sound happy to hear that. She did say that she doesn't understand how I could understand him so well though.
Up till today the birthday present is still with me. I wonder if I will ever give it to him. I wonder if it's a sign that I should never give it to him because, probably, he will realize my feeling for him.
"Su Riah, you really should move on," I lay down on my bed, starring at my phone. "Give it away and forget him."
"Kim Myungsoo, have you watched the new movie?"
Sent.
My heart beats faster with every second passes, waiting for his answer.
"Nope. Not yet. I watched another movie last week though. kkk~"
Ah, yes, I did accidentally meet him last week at a mall. I had no idea he would be there. It's when I took the escalator downstairs, he was going upstairs. Speaking about coincidences.
"Ah, right. If I knew you would be there, I should bring your present. It's going to be stuck here forever! kkk~"
I'm not expecting any invitation afterwards. Perhaps I expected too much that I felt hurt even worse so I guess I should learn to stop expecting from him.
"Hmm, are you free after work tomorrow then? I have my off tomorrow. We can watch the movie too."
Did I just read it right? Did he just...
"Seriously? The movie? I'm free after five only, you know."
"Err, sorry. My cousin will come tomorrow on eight so... no movie, Hyung, but I'll come. Dinner perhaps. Besides you did say you have a lot of stories to tell at your office right?"
Yes. I did give him an excuse so he would come over, because I had been really busy lately. My load at office increased that I could only leave at midnight.
Despite the fact that I couldn't watch the movie, I should be grateful that he agreed to come over right?
"Well, fine with me. I'll see you tomorrow...?"
"See you tomorrow, Hyung. kkk~"
Tomorrow. What a sudden change of plan.
I look at the present again and I hold my breath for a moment.
I guess today is the last night for me to stop being dilemma for him. Maybe.
Tomorrow it is then.
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