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The Star-Crossed Hearts
"Where are they?" Jieul groans impatiently as she keeps walking back and forth in her blue party gown. "Aish, it will start in five minutes! Let's just call her again!"
 
Tonight is the day of the wedding party for Jieul's sister. Yoojoon and I have arrived around thirty minutes ago to meet up with Jieul.
 
She looks pretty in her dress while Yoojoon tries to look his best in the new long-sleeved shirt. Meanwhile I wear my black dress and silver high heels, putting a calm expression outside but my heart is not calm at all.
 
Haemin is on her way her with Myungsoo. It's a good thing that I can meet him and I should be happy but something feels strange whenever I remember that we will meet within minutes.
 
Jealousy? I don't think so.
 
Haemin is currently close with another guy and I know she doesn't have a thing for Myungsoo. At least for now. Then what is this feeling?
 
"Go inside first," I tell Jieul with a simple smile. "I'll wait for Haemin. Go. Your sister must be waiting for you now. We'll see you inside the ballroom, okay?"
 
She eventually agrees and makes me to repeat once again that we will immediately go to the ballroom once Haemin and Myungsoo arrive.
 
"Are you alright?" Yoojoon suddenly asks me. His gaze pierces me even though he doesn't show any serious expression. "He comes here with Haemin, you know."
 
I shrug, "I guess. Should I not be alright?"
 
Our conversation is cut off by the opened elevator. The girl in cream-colored dress steps out from the elevator, accompanied with the guy who has captivated my heart for almost a year.
 
Instead of trying to look at Myungsoo, I pull Haemin and say, "Where were you?! Come on. Jieul is waiting for us! The party has started!"
 
It's impossible to avoid Myungsoo for the whole night. It's a sure thing but I keep telling myself that maybe it's the best if I just don't stay too close with him somehow.
 
When it's the time to do the wedding toast, I hand over glass by glass to people behind me and that's when my eyes finally meet with Myungsoo's.
 
"Yo, Hyung," he greets me with the boyish grin.
 
I clear my throat and pretend that I have nothing in mind about him, "Yo. How unusual it is to have you here. Any special reason to come here, eh?"
 
"Not really," he takes a sip of the drink. "Just bored and I don't have anything to do either tonight."
 
Lie.
 
That word crosses my mind but I purse my lips, knowing that it's not a good thing to say it out loud.
 
There is a soccer match tonight and it's a match for his favorite soccer club. He is busy with his phone since we entered the ballroom to look at the current score.
 
He is someone who is willing to sacrifice his sleeping time just to watch the match and now, here he is, at a wedding party of someone he doesn't even know and saying that he has nothing to do.
 
Does he think I just knew him yesterday?
 
"I see that someone is too happy that she can't even speak too much," Haemin teases me as we are enjoying the desserts. Both Myungsoo and Yoojoon are somewhere else to look for food. "Doesn't he look so handsome tonight, Riah?"
 
My lips turn into a forced smile. He looks gorgeous tonight but I'm not happy.
 
For the very first time since I realized that I'm in love with him, I actually don't want to stay too long with Myungsoo.
 
In fact I feel like I want to leave this place as soon as possible so I don't need to fake a smile in front of him.
 
Because being with him like this reminds me that no matter what I do, it's just impossible to have his heart. He is so close but I can't reach for him. This unwanted feeling keeps haunting me without mercy and a decision is waiting for me in the end of the journey anyway.

Even though I tried really hard to think of Lee Jonghyun instead of Kim Myungsoo, I just can't. I ended up missing him more when I did that.
 
And I guess I have found the answer already tonight.
 
"Yah, Riah!" Haemin takes my phone from hand after I took a picture of her and Myungsoo together. "It's your turn. You two still don't have a picture tonight! Come on!"
 
Sitting side by side with Myungsoo, we don't even look at each other. I smile as I tell myself that maybe it's the last picture I would take with him with a feeling of love for him.
 
Giving up is the only option I have now.
 
Holding on will just hurt me even more. The only certainty that I have from him is that he doesn't see me as a special person anymore. Perhaps not even from the start.
 
Thinking about him who never thinks of me like how I wish for him is the same like giving scar by scar to my heart.
 
"What if he actually also likes you?" Yoojoon asks a random question when we're on our way back. Both Haemin and Myungsoo have left first and Jieul stays back to help her sister. "I mean... Who knows, right?"
 
I lean against the wall of elevator and heave a sigh, "You know... It's funny."
 
Yoojoon frowns, definitely doesn't understand what I'm trying to say, "What's funny?"
 
"It's funny," I smile weakly. "When you like someone and they don't really like you back, it hurts but it's not so bad, you know."
 
"But when you really like them... I mean really, as in really like them. Love them. But you find they just like you... It hurts. It really hurts."
 
Yoojoon falls into silence upon my statement. I don't really ask for him to reply anyway.
 
It's scary how I love Myungsoo too much that I don't even know how to stop.
 
But if I don't stop myself, then who will stop me from breaking myself into a deeper heartbreak?


__________



Author's Note:

This event eventually happened lately; one or two months ago.
Yes, the story keeps going on and within the next chapters you will find out what happened lately in Riah's life. ;)

Thank you for reading and feel free to drop your comments below or mention me
@AFFkyuri91 via Twitter!
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Comments

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inspirit0712
#1
Chapter 40: This story broke my heart a thousand times. It's because this is similar to mine.., falling in love with someone unconditionally, hurting yourself over and over again yet you find no reason not to love him and even if you've convinced yourself you've move on but the moment you saw that person, all those feelings and memories came rushing back...
I just want to ask question though,,is it your own experience too?
I won't force you to answer if you're uncomfortable.
Anyways,,thanks for writing this story..<3
ajnadin
#2
Chapter 40: i really really feel hurt
blossomblackandwhite #3
Chapter 40: Okay, all i could say 'THIS STORY SOOO PERFECT!' i believe some of people ever encounter this kind situation (sadly, me too). I even can feel riah sincere for myungsoo... hope she could find someone betrer for her, she deserve more ♡ thank you for writing this beautiful story author-nim...^^
everydaechen
#4
Chapter 29: KYAAAAAAAAA MALIQ N D'ESSENTIALS!!! NEVER THOUGHT I'D CAME ACROSS A FIC WITH MALIQ IN IT!!!! /FANGIRLS/
alienjello-dy #5
Chapter 40: i can totally relate myself to Riah's situation in this story
so i kind of understand her pain ...
i cried at the very final chapter though ...
elseiraa-
#6
Chapter 39: hey, your story have touched my heart :')
my eyes teared up on almost every chapter, and I know how painful is the pain that Riah feels. been there, done that :"
Wishing all the best for Riah's love life, may you find your true love :3
timcil
#7
Chapter 38: the ending is so realistic. its great!
blueskypiz #8
Chapter 29: Untitled - maliq n d'essential
inspirit-beauty #9
Chapter 40: just omg this is really a sad one sided love story! dont worry there will be a "someday" for us, its just that myung happens to be ur first step in loving expirience, i know there will be more :) and u really love him, for letting him and minding his own happiness he is one lucky guy and u r one in a million to love.. i hope ur friendship will still remains, better luck next time i guess but until now im still curious if what myung really thinks! haha i hope for ur fast recovery in ur first heartache? ^-^v
watermelon
#10
Chapter 40: It's really heart-wrenching.
I will never be able to do that. Walking in, smiling while seeing him and her together.
The reason you cried for is so pure and kind.
But I guess maybe that's what they call true love, something I haven't experienced before though I've been hurt by a one-sided love before too.
I respect you, and I hope you know that.
One day, you'll meet your destined star too.
And I truly believe he will hold you dearest to him, till infinity and beyond.(':
Just like what I've said before, I really love this story. Because it's true, sincere and lovely.
Simple but yet beautiful. Thank you for sharing.<3
Hope today is a good day for you...(: