Always taste like you

Yongsun could be described in three ways.

Shy but wild.

Weird but friendly.

And most of all, straightforward but loyal.

"What the matter with you? You look like you just kicked a puppy. A very cute puppy."

See? Straightforward.

"Spill, Bae Joohyun. I'm not going to leave until you spill."

But loyal.

After Joohyun went home after the midterm and came back, she became a zombie.

She barely talked and at first, Yongsun and Suho figured it was because of their midterms and multiple assignments. So the two friends decided to pretend not to notice their friend's distant behavior and wait until the finals ended.

"I'm sure she's suffering because of her boyfriend," Suho muttered as they watched Joohyun staring out the window for a half an hour. And Yongsun could only frown in concern.

Their finals ended three days ago but Bae Joohyun was still the same.

Because of her wild and weird personality, Yongsun had made up her mind to get unbelievably drunk, partying with their dance club which meant she wanted Joohyun to join them.

But here the bunny was, in the library, reading a book. Hadn't they read enough books this semester?

Joohyun reluctantly put her book down. The library was of course, empty but Joohyun looked around to make sure no one was listening. As if she was being watched.

"I need to tell you something."

Yongsun frowned. Joohyun sure sounded serious.

"About what? The finals?"

Joohyun shook her head. "No. About my.. boyfriend."

Yongsun obliviously scratched her head.

"I'm no expert in relationships so I don't if I could be any help."

"That's fine," Joohyun assured her as she stood up, slinging her backpack over her shoulder. "Why don't we talk somewhere else? How about the cafe? It'll be on me."

Even though Yongsun wanted a drink filled with alcohol but she chose to follow her loyal side and put the wild one into sleep.

"Sure. There's no rum in the cafe, right?"

For the first time, Joohyun ordered iced tea instead of strawberry shake.

"Okay. Now I can tell something is definitely, horribly wrong."

Yongsun furrowed her brow, trying to at least get a hint about her friend's problem.

"Does Suho has something to do with it?"

Joohyun hesitated, not even touching her drink. "I guess he is." She admitted and Yongsun waited patiently.

"Yongsun," Joohyun spoke after a long pause. "We're friends no matter what, right?"

Yongsun blinked in awe. "So suddenly?" But she became weak in front of the pretty girl looking at her with those puppy dog eyes.

"Unless you're an ax murderer or don't think of me as y, of course."

Joohyun's expression softened and she even managed a playful grin.

"Aw, I'm not qualified because of the latter."

"Spill, Bae Joohyun."

"Okay." Joohyun took a deep breath. "What are your thoughts about.. same-gender relationship?"

Yongsun froze as her eyes widened. "Ho... How..." She stuttered. "How did you know?"

Joohyun raised an eyebrow. "Know what?"

Okay. She should add one more way to describe herself.

Guilty and stupid.

Yongsun cursed to herself as she faked an awkward laugh.

"I mean... That I already knew! Yeah, that's right!"

"Riiight," Joohyun smirked at her friend's awkward bitter and thought how bad Yongsun was at lying. Just like Seulgi. She thought to herself and her smirk faded into a bitter smile.

Yongsun let out a frustrated sigh. "We're friends no matter what, right?"

Joohyun smiled in amusement. "Unless you're an ax murderer."

Yongsun paused, not knowing where to start. "Well... It wasn't even a relationship with a label but..."

"But you did have feelings.. for a girl, right?"

Yongsun nodded, relieved they were sitting in the corner.

"I met her in high school. I was a sophomore and she was a freshman."

Joohyun gave her a nod of encouragement. "Go on."

"We've met at the school dance club."

"Let me guess," Joohyun smirked. "Love at first sight?"

"Nope." Yongsun laughed half-heartedly. "Quite the opposite. We despised each other."

Joohyun gave her a confused look. "Okay?"

"We fought so much the president of the club even considered kicking her out."

Yongsun chuckled as she recalled her high school days.

"So she asked if we could talk. So I invited her over to my house-"

"Wait." Joohyun interrupted. "You invited your mortal enemy to your house?"

Yongsun sheepishly smiled. "I guess looking back, I was unconsciously attracted to her."

Joohyun reluctantly nodded. "I respect your taste in relationships."

"Anyway," Yongsun continued. "We talked and spent the whole night together. And I realized how much we were in common."

"So you fell in love because of that?"

Yongsun paused, sinking into her thoughts. "If you asked me that a year ago, I would have said no. But now," Her eyes turned wistful. "Yes."

"What happened?" Joohyun asked carefully since this was the first time Yongsun ever looked this.. blue.

"We were inseparable." Yongsun chuckled. "If she was a guy, everyone would have suspected we were dating."

"But you never put a label on your relationship?"

Yongsun nodded guiltily. "We were young. I was young. I was too naive to realize I thought of her more than a friend. I realized that when we went different ways."

"So.. you shut her out?"

"No." Yongsun shook her head firmly. "I realized about my feelings for her when some guy asked me out. I raced back to the dorm and called her, ready to confess."

Her mind flashed back to the day she desperately ran all the way to her dorm and slam opened her bedroom door, making Wheein wake up with a groan.

"But she turned me down," Yongsun said with a tinge of bitterness in her tone. "What still bothered me was that she seemed so.. shaken up. As if someone threatened her. But she cut me out after the call so there was no way I could know."

"Can't you go see her?" Joohyun asked, also feeling the heartache.

"I tried. Several times." Yongsun said sadly. "But I only knew which college she was attending." She stared down at her coffee. "Her family had moved to another area so all I could do is stand and wait for her in front of her college."

"That's ridiculous!" Joohyun exclaimed and Yongsun agreed.

"I know. But I was that desperate."

"What did she exactly say?" Joohyun asked and Yongsun sighed, feeling the heavy load on her chest that had remained for two years.

"She said she didn't want me to go through all that." She replied. "That she wanted me to follow my dream to become a doctor." Yongsun balled her hands into fists. "And at that time I thought maybe she was right."

"So she let you go? Just like that?"

Yongsun wrapped the mug with her hands with her eyes gazing into nothing. "I was so upset too at first. But then I realized she was sobbing so hard when she said all that. And that made me regret not answering."

"Do you regret losing her?" Joohyun asked, feeling she was no different. "Even if that meant everything could change? Even your dream?"

Yongsun softly laughed. "It seems invalid when you put it that way, right? But.." She held the mug in her hands and sighed in content after taking a sip.

"Since I'm the kind of person who prioritizes emotions over reality, yes. Yes, I regret losing her." She put the mug down and looked down, not wanting to cry when the finals ended. "I just.. I just wish I could see her again. To see if she's okay without me."

Joohyun imagined what it would be like if that ever happened to Seulgi and her.

If Seulgi had left her for good, she doubted she could've come this far.

"So," Yongsun looked at her with a tight smile. "What's your girlfriend like?"

Now it was Joohyun's time to awkwardly laugh. "What? No-"

"Please," Yongsun rolled her eyes. "Your face is so obvious. You were almost telling me with your eyes 'Yes, me too! I too have a girl I love very much!'."

Now her being the story-teller, Joohyun fidgeted uneasily. "Y