Chapter 39 (Part2)

Strawberries&Cigarettes
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Still, strawberries and cigarettes always taste like

 

When the CSAT was over, there were two kinds of high school juniors.

One was enjoying their newborn life as adults, shopping for clothes and makeup, workout for diet, and meet any friends they hadn't seen for months.

The other was mourning about their life, having to take the CSAT again. They would usually cut contact with everyone and even spend their new year in the academy filled with students like them.

Seulgi was neither.

She still remembered how Joohyun stormed out of the cafe when she announced they should take a break, looking so upset to even think of smacking her in the face.

Even though some people were chancing glances at her and whispering, she couldn't care less.

She had aimlessly walked home and slammed the door shut of her room and stayed there for three days straight.

It was when Yerim invaded her room through the window Seulgi finally got out.

Yerim had dragged her everywhere downtown. To the movies, shopping, and eating. But Seulgi didn't enjoy any of them. Even the last.

When a week passed, Seulgi decided to at least try to do something.

So here she was now, a sheet of white paper on her desk, with her hand gripping a pencil.

Drawing always made her calm and escape from her what-ifs, so Seulgi thought maybe it would help her this time too.

But she could never be more wrong.

Her hand automatically started to draw the face of a particular girl, and she threw away the pencil as if it suddenly turned into a cockroach.

Feeling the Deja-vu, Seulgi sighed and covered her face with both hands as she rested her arms on the desk.

It was cruel how memories are the only thing left when you reach the end.

And they remain in the most heartbreaking way.

It was a shame and irony since they once filled her world with flying colors.

Seulgi slumped on her desk, not even bothering to lie on her bed to sleep.

Such a shame indeed.

 

"I am nothing special, just a common man with common thoughts, and I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten."

"What a shame." Seulgi yawned as she rested her head on the older's shoulder. "That writer just crushed every kid's dream."

It was early in the morning, and Seulgi should have been snuggled up to her pillow but instead, she was awoken by Joohyun's call and was dragged into the library since morning was the only time there were hardly any people.

Joohyun loved the library. Seulgi would have even thought the library was created because of her. It was peaceful, filled with books she hadn't read, and most of all, Joohyun loved whispering romantic quotes from her favorite books to her.

Seulgi had complained whenever Joohyun tried to drag her to the library so early in the morning, but the younger couldn't argue when Joohyun explained the reason.

"I love the library. And I love you. So two of you combined is like heaven to me."

So there she was, trying not to fall asleep as Joohyun read her book in peace.

"Just listen," The older insisted. "But in one respect I have succeeded as gloriously as anyone who's ever lived: I've loved another with all my heart and soul, and to me, this has always been enough."

Seulgi tried to shut tight to now yawn again. "That's romantic." She agreed. "If you changed the word 'man' to 'woman' I would have definitely fallen in love with you all over again."

"Oh?" Joohyun raised an eyebrow. "Then should I try again?"

"No need since I'm already yours."

"Of course." Joohyun agreed as she smiled in satisfaction.

"Is that your favorite quote?" Seulgi knew the older loved telling her the reason why she chose a particular quote. And Seulgi loved pleasing her.

"Yes," Joohyun said excitedly. "Because it reminds me of what's really important in our life."

Seulgi looked at the older in amusement. "And what is that?"

"Loving someone with all your heart and soul," Joohyun replied. "Because you know people always talk about rich people who are actually empty and miserable, right?"

"I figured they just want to feel better about themselves."

Joohyun rolled her eyes. "Anyway, what you do think we're living for?"

"Umm...." Seulgi scratched her head. "We live because we're born. And we live for success and achievement."

But Joohyun shook her head. "I thought so too. But think about it, what if you never met me in the first place?"

Seulgi blinked at the horrifying theory. "Do I really have to imagine that?"

"Just try. At least a little." Joohyun urged and Seulgi sighed helplessly.

"I would be alive." The younger finally answered. "But I won't be able to live."

Joohyun's eyes grew tender at her answer, somehow touched by it.

"So will I." The older said softly. "So will I."

"I guess I could understand if you put it that way." Seulgi looked down, suddenly feeling a little embarrassed.

"In the end, you live because you love someone." Joohyun agreed. "And they call it a miracle when someone loves you back."

 

Seulgi had found her miracle. But she lost it.

And she was alive, but she was barely living.

 

Yerim called her the next day to hang out.

Seulgi eventually dragged herself out of her room because she knew what will happen if she ever declined Kim Yerim's suggestion.

She knew there was almost zero possibility to bump into Joohyun since downtown was the exact opposite of the library, but Seulgi couldn't help but hope to at least catch a glimpse of her.

She could always draw when she missed her, she had ever since Joohyun went to college.

But Joohyun never failed to make Seulgi's heart skip a beat whenever she saw her in person other than her drawings and even her pictures.

As her mind started to drift off again, it vanished as soon as Yerim dragged her to the arcade, where speakers blared every noisy, annoying music that ever existed.

"Let's play that one!" Yerim pointed at the large air hockey table in the middle.

Before Seulgi could response, she was standing right in front of the table with Yerim facing the other side and Yerim hit the puck with such force Seulgi had to snap her mind out of it to make sure she won't get injured.

Thanks to her senses which were full alert, she won the game and she realized how shocking it was for her to win a game.

"I won?" Seulgi said in awe as Yerim sulked. "You have to buy ice cream for me?"

Yerim huffed. "In your dreams, Kang Seulgi."

"Deal is a deal, Kim Yerim."

So they ended up in the ice cream shop nearby, and as Yerim ordered their ice creams Seulgi sat on the table, staring out the bustling crowd outside, unconsciously searching for a familiar face.

Then she remembered why her winning felt so odd.

 

"I win again!"

Joohyun pumped up her fist in victory as she laughed with Seulgi sulking on the other side of the air hockey table.

"You never let me win." The younger whined. "Why do you like the arcade anyway? You hate noisy places."

After their movie, Joohyun had suggested a bet to buy ice cream after the game of air hockey and Seulgi confidently agreed, since she never lost air hockey even to her brother.

But Joohyun was surprisingly good. Too good.

When Seulgi easily earned one goal, Joohyun's eyes suddenly changed with full passion and determination. And she won by earning ten more goals than her.

"Because I like games." Joohyun simply replied and Seulgi snorted. "More like you like winning."

"I do," Joohyun admitted. "I had been like that since I was a kid."

"Come to think of it," Seulgi pondered the other moment they ever played games. "Even when we played a card game you always won."

"That's because I'm good at it."

"You have no mercy." Seulgi griped as she pulled out her wallet. "I swear I'm going to get broke because of you and your obsession with winning."

"Aw, are you mad?" Joohyun giggled as she slid her arm around the younger's. "Then today's ice cream is on me."

"It's not just that." Seulgi pouted. "It upsets me you think of me as one of your competitors."

"That's not true!" Joohyun exclaimed but Seulgi looked unconvinced.

"Well, you're sure good at pretending."

"It's just that.." Joohyun hesitated with a frown. "I just grew up like that, you know? Every time I won something my parents showered me with presents and compliments. And practically grew up for that when I was a kid."

"I didn't know ice cream can be a motivation."

"I'm sorry." Joohyun interlocked their fingers, concerned she might have really upset the younger. "I'll try not to be like that anymore. At least to you."

 

As they passed along the stores with ice cream on their each hand, Joohyun suddenly stopped.

"Seulgi!" She called excitedly like an eight-year-old girl calling her parents when she saw something amazing. "Look!"

Seulgi followed her gaze and saw a store filled with claw machines.

"How about I make it up to you?" Joohyun suggested with an impish grin. "With my competitiveness, I swear I could make you go home with your arms filled with teddy bears."

So they ended up spending the rest of their evening in front of the claw machine. At first, it was amusing to see Joohyun concentrating so hard on a game machine and cursing to herself in indignation whenever the claw failed to pick up the doll she was going for.

But when that continued for an hour, with not even a single doll pulled out from the machine.

"Joohyun," Seulgi said, who was crouching beside her because of her aching legs.

"I already have lots of teddy bears. And you don't have to try so hard to make up for it so let's just go home."

"No," Joohyun said firmly after cursing again at the claw for missing the teddy. "I'm going to get you that damn teddy."

So Seulgi miserably spent the next hour waiting for the older to finally succeed.

Seulgi could barely keep her eyes open during the ride back home and holding a teddy bear in her arms didn't actually help her no

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MeloMera
I don't have a twitter account anymore but thankfully I saw a pleasant surprise today when I went back to my account for the last time :)
Thank you @dinniebur for liking this fic so much! I'm very happy&grateful that you enjoyed it :) your reactions about each chapter made my day haha

Comments

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hollyhunterey
#1
One of the best.. Thank you very much 💕
Kylie_123 #2
Rereading !!! Kasi gusto ko kiligin ulit 💗💗💗
Jensoo4everlove #3
Chapter 59: I LOVED THIS SO SO MUCH 😭❤ And thankyou so so much Author for taking out time to write such a masterpiece!!! I really appreciate it!! But why can't I see the sequel? 🥺
sjaelister
#4
I just want to ask if this is the original version because I read this but it's the Ryeji version on wattpad huhuhu.
AnneTokki 34 streak #5
Chapter 59: 💓💓💓💛💛💛🫶
Revemid12
#6
Reading this masterpiece for the third time, is my comfort fic, let’s goo!
Oct_13_wen_03 26 streak #7
Chapter 49: reread❤❤
serenedipitea
#8
Chapter 20: this chapter made me cry. the angst!!!
Seul_rene14 #9
Chapter 59: Am I the only one who won't get to read the sequel?🥺😭
gcpt21 #10
Chapter 49: This fic is so beautiful thank you so much author ily