"I get it's not quite easy but-"

Jungkook snorted.

"By all means hyung, this may be the understatement of the century."

Hands folded in a pleading manner Seokjin tried again, slowly sounding desperate. "I know I know but as I said earlier I can't guide you properly, there is only so much I can do for you. So please keep focusing on finding your inner middle."

"Inner middle, my ! Do I look like some yoga guru or qui gong master or whoever knows sh*t about inner middle and flow of your chi and whatnot?" Jungkook was more than just mildly pissed as he really had no clue what to do. He could almost feel Tae's time running through his fingers and he still was clueless. It was frustrating to no end.

The eldest smacked him on the arm harshly, no longer pleading but rather angry himself by now. "Yah! In case you forgot, Taehyung-sshi's life is hanging on a thread right now so you better follow my actually genius instructions asap and stop complaining. Now go find your ing middle!"

From somewhere at the sidelines Yoongi threw in snarkily: "You do realize the more you praise yourself the more time we waste right?"

"Oh, shut up, you!", the pink-haired man exclaimed, pointing an accusing finger at Yoongi and effectively putting him into place as he was too baffled to retord. Then Seokjin whirled around to Jungkook but somehow during the movement his energy transformed from pissiness to eagerness, making him look like an oversized puppy. "Now, if you listen inside of yourself what do your hear?"

For the sake of Tae Jungkook bit back another rude answer and tried to actually do as told. Some seconds passed and he felt so stupid standing there and listening for, what, a hidden cat in his tummy to meow or what?

After more seconds filled with expectant silence he just went for "...uh, maybe a cacophony of shouts to get out finally?"

Seokjin shook his head. "Okay that's incredibly useless. Let's try something else." He hummed, contemplating. "If you think of your Blessing, how do you picture it?"

This was a question Jungkook could answer at sorts. "Like some some thick fluid, honey or soup but sometimes it's more fluid than at other times. Slippery." He made an uncertain gesture as if trying to catch said honey from dripping down.

"And how do you keep it in check?"

"With a bowl. I've put the soup in a bowl. A bowl and walls around the bowl." A bowl that apparently once had been utterly destroyed by a certain cheesecake.

Seokjin nodded along. Add a white coat and nobody would've questioned it when he declared himself leading doctor of the hospital. Jungkook shortly thought his hyung had too much fun with his new role as he came up with the next task. "I see... Alright, can you try stirring the soup? Does that feel different?"

"Uhm."

He tried, he really did.

Tried to imagine plunging into the bowl and twisting his hand. Twisting an invisible hand of him inside of his stomach. The idea alone made him sick. Growing a hand in your stomach and your chest... he shuddered. Pushed his disgust aside and twisted the phantom hand another time. His Blessing buckled wildly and made his stomach churn. He clasped a hand against his mouth. It felt like his insides were turning upside-down. Already the burning taste of bile filled his mouth. Jungkook let go of the phantom hand, knees wobbly.

"...No. Hyung, it feels weird like I'm gonna puke but the Blessing - it still feels the same." That was the moment he remembered Taehyung and started to freak out. Because if he made no progress... "Hyung, what should I do?" He couldn't surpress the evident panic in his voice. What should I do? Why am I so useless?

Yoongi saw this as his cue to pipe up in his usual manner. "First off, calm yo' a** down and then listen to the doc", he ordered with no room for arguments.

"Thanks, I guess...", Seokjin muttered. Then clapped his hands and got back to work. "So Jungkook-sshi, how does it feel for you to use your Blessing usually? Does it feel like you are forcing the soup down your, uhm, let's say aqquaintance's, throat or more like you are wrapping them in it or how is it?"

Jungkook had to admit he'd never thought about it much. "I... well... more like the second one I guess?"

"So basically your Blessing is attacking the person from everywhere and seeping into their body to kill them? As if your Blessing being liquid death... that means on dead people the essence of it might still cling." With every sentence the eldest spoke faster in excitement, chasing the answer dangling before his nose until-

He slammed a fist into his other hand and jumped up. Eyes practically sparkling. If Jungkook was being honest with himself the view was rather unsettling. He decided he didn't want to walk in on an excited Kim Seokjin at midnight in a dark alleyway. Now the elder was even snapping his fingers repeatedly.

"Alright, I think I figured it out! Jungkook, I want you to try feeling something on Taehyung-sshi that feels similar and pull it back into yourself."

"...What."

But Jin was already ushering him closer to Taehyung - because yes, his hyungs had been this cruel and separated Jungkook from his love so he could 'focus on the task' - and flapping his hands like a mother hen. "Well, what are you waiting for, hurry the up, every minute is precious remember?!"

From his natural spot back at Taehyung's side Jungkook heard his second scoff. "This sounds so stupid it could actually work."

Seokjin flipped his hair at that."I know I'm brilliant thanks."

It took Jungkook a couple tries to tone out everything not being Tae. He was so used to pay attention for anything, any detail that could pose a threat that the habit was working against him now. Now of all times! He lost a frustrated shout, making everyone else jump. Great, so now he was riled up AND unfocused.

Massaging his earlobes and murmuring "woozaaaaah~" he eventually calmed down and toned in on the brunet before him.

So how am I supposed to feel my Blessing anywhere else but inside me?

Not coming up with anything more useful Jungkook pulled himself onto the bed and flopped down on Taehyung, eliminating every space between them. All in hope of making it easier to feel and really...

"WHOA!"

With a rattling thud Jungkook fell out of the bed. Like a crab he scrambled a few metres away from that strange sensation. Because yes, as he had felt closely there had been something like an oily sheen on the singer. Both arms wrapped around his torso he crept closer again, his hyungs' eyes burning on his back. With outstretched finger Jungkook poked the thin layer - there and not there - and tried to get comfy with the sensation. He poked on several spots, the layer unmoving. Only as he laid a flat palm on Taehyung's chest and concentrated on the sheen he screamed and scurried in the far back of the room.

Maybe another minute passed and he hovered over the singer again and repeated the procedure. Just like last time oil gathered to tentacles enveloping his hand like an octopus or some underwater plant. Coming to him, trapping him.

But if this was to be his Blessing... 

Jungkook tugged at one tentacle, tugged it in - and watched with no little amount of disgust how his hand turned an angry red as the invisible tentacle was forcing itself through his skin, flesh and bones, up through his arm and shoulder, like a leech swimming around inside of him, following the blodd stream up to his heart. He tugged harsher and with a smack the tentacle speared through his bowl and to the Blessing that was actually his.

He hissed, teeth clenching at the foreign sensation, at the feeling of something else, something utterly wrong being in his system. Disgusting. And while one end of the tentacle now mingled with Jungkook's Blessing, the other end - it was not an end at all, the whole rest of the oily sheen hanging on it creating a thick thread through Jungkook's whole upper body to the point where his now deep red hand was rested. Like one giant tape worm running through him.

Jungkook vomitted right onto the floor. Still didn't pull his hand away. In the back of his mind he registered his hyungs moving around and maybe wiping his accident away as he clenched his teeth and continuosly pulled the oily thread into him.

If this was how pumping poison into ones veins felt like then Jungkook would certainly never do it. He barely registered his nails digging bloody crescends into Tae's chest, barely registered the biting stench of bile and the nasty taste in his mouth, didn't notice the trembles shaking his body. All of his attention was focused on the sickening feeling of that thing inside him, on pulling, pulling, pulling further!

Some point was crossed and Jungkook gave himself to the rhythm he had built of pulling and swallowing, taking the tapeworm in and let it mix with his Blessing. He had lost connection to his body, to the agonizing sensations rushing through him, and the pain and fear and anger. His actions were mechanic now, pull, it up, pull, breathe. The only thing anchoring him in reality his hand laying on a cold chest that couldn't be Tae's.

The tremors got worse with every minute. One time he was there, was back again long enough to rasp out "chair... I-I need a chair..." before his legs gave in and he collapsed on one of the plastic chairs hurriedly placed behind him. Then he continued pulling and fell back into his trance-like state.

Jungkook didn't register it for a long while but the skin beneath his palm was steadily warming up. And as he felt, as he felt the faintest thrum of blood beneath his fingertips...

"Oh my gawd!", he squeaked, eyes blown wide. He stared, and stared and stared at the not-so-doll-like-anymore body laying there. Casted his senses out, feeling there was only a little bit of the oily sheen left on Taehyung. Jungkook looked up, still stunned, to see his hyungs crowding around the unmoving singer and gawking. For they too were now beholding the change going on with the second-youngest. He didn't look dead anymore but not alive yet either, hanging on a thin thread somewhere inbetween.

Jungkook cleared his throat and sat up straighter with new determination, aggressively pulling at the remaining substance holding Taehyung captive. But this time he'd overestimated himself. Too much! Too much at once. Red specks painted his hand as he doubled over and coughed. Somebody patted his back.

Then it was over and he continued his task of up every bit he could get.

Two minutes passed, then five, ten, fifteen. Why couldn't he finish?! Jungkook grew restless as he pulled at the last slimy string but it did. Not. Budge. He pulled and pulled violently, coughing up more blood, nails of his trembling hand digging deeper into tanned skin, vision blurring at the edges. It didn't help. Just one last bit! He was so close, why didn't it work anymore? A frustrated shout rose in his throat.

"GAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!" 

He was standing again, pressing his whole body weight on Taehyung as he was pulling and pulling but-

"Let go already, you ing sh*t", Jungkook growled and clawed at the brunet's chest furiously, at the slimy string there taunting him.

Then strong hands were grapping him, pulling him away and pushing him back into his chair. Holding him in place to not further harm his beloved one.

Only slowly he managed to calm down.

This time it was Hoseok who spoke up. "Listen Kook-ah, I'm not an expert but maybe you need to...", he fidgeted around looking at Yoongi for help but the second stayed silent. He sighed. "Maybe you need to, uhm, end it the same way you... usually... do?"

Jungkook blinked. 

"Huh?"

"Like uh, you know, when you... I mean the other times, uhm... well, err... and like that, uh, yeah..." The red-head was gestikulating wildly but Jungkook still had no idea what he meant.

After a few seconds of Hoseok flapping his arms helplessly, Yoongi gave some pity. "You need to kiss him, for god's sake", he stated blantly.

Oh.

Oh!

"Uhm..." Jungkook felt his cheeks and ears flaring red. Never had he ever, infront of somebody else... A faint whimper slipped him as his eyes shot from Seokjin hovering above him to Hoseok, to Yoongi and back. His whole face burned.

"Hyungs... can you like, maybe, turn around... or something?", he asked timidly.

To his utter relief nobody chuckled but all three men obligued.

Not that it made the task at hand much easier. Kissing Tae was one thing but kissing him without his consent when he was unconscious - he still refused to think the 'd-word' -  and with three other people being in the room was something totally different. So what if Jungkook needed a solid five minutes to pep-talk himself?

He took a hesitant step forward and leaned down in an awkward angle. This whole situation was awkward. Awkward, awkward, awkward. He mouthed the word silently, scooting closer. With one last deep breath Jungkook closed the distance and slotted his mouth against Taehyung's.

At first it was just uncomfortable, as if he was kissing a sponge or one of those puppets from first-aid courses - nothing happened. Jungkook massaged his lips against the singer's, nibbled at his lower lip and, eventually, speared his mouth open with his tongue, into the unresponsive cavern. Soon his movements grew frantic at the lack of change and his left hand wandered back to Tae's chest. and , kissing, Jungkook tried again and pulled at the string and this time...

Hot scorching pain shot through his throat and down into his core like a burning arrow. He jerked away groaning and fell onto the floor. Through sweat-drenched bangs he glanced up, both arms wrapping around his torso and he saw.

Saw Taehyung in a deep breath, spluttering, toppling over but - moving. Living!

Jungkook felt a hysterical laugh rise inside him at the sight.

The sound never left his mouth though as his whole body went rigid and then began to spasm uncontrollaby, legs kicking out, arms twitching, head jerking from side to side. Somewhere above him Tae was still coughing as he unraveled and sharp lashes of wind rushed out of him in a wave of destruction, shattering the whole furniture.

And while his Blessing and that oily thing that was Tae's death tore him apart from the inside he kept screaming, kept screaming in agony as blood and bile filled his mouth, kept screaming as the wind raged through the room and his hyungs yelled something, kept screaming as that oily sheen he'd stored inside him pushed past his skin and went god-knows-where, kept screaming as his body continued to jerk uncontrollably. Kept screaming until blood, bile and spit went down the wrong pipe and only gurgles left his mouth.

How, he did not know but through all the pain and chaos he found one of Taehyung's hands and squeezed it tightly, the brunet squeezing back. He held onto it, onto that knee-buckling warm and moving, living hand, pressed Tae's slender fingers against his forehead as tremors and jerks shook every bone of him.

Already Jungkook lost consciousness and for a split-second he just thought that he was so sick of blacking out and-

Never again. I'm never going to do this ever again.

A last shudder went through him then it was silent, the wind gone, shrouded furniture laying everywhere. Taehyung gone quiet.

And were for so long his Blessing had been a steady presence all he could feel was...

Emptiness.