Jongin: Is It You, Me or Us

Call to the Sea

The sun had been up for some time already. Light streamed into the room and danced across the floor. Jongin watched them peacefully in a completely blissful state. Mark was warm, which helped Jongin because he often felt cold at night whatever the weather. Jongin made note Mark was lovely in a lot of ways; he was kind to Mark in ways others had never been before, he seemed to acknowledge and attend to Jongin's needs, no matter how weird. Jongin was incredibly grateful Mark hadn't pushed him away when Jongin climbed into his bed a few hours ago, but instead pulled him closer. 

It was a problem Jongin had to work on; not being able to sleep alone in new places. It's been this way ever since he was a small child, but he's never had a reason to try and fix it; Krystal never minded and he never went anywhere else on his own for very long. After this however, Jongin thought he should probably try to fix it. 

Jongin felt movement behind him but he didn't feel a need to move. It was too safe and warm where he was. “Good morning.” Mark said. 

Jongin smiled and knew he was blushing but didn't make a move to hide himself. “Good morning.” he whispered. 

“Did you sleep well?” Mark asked. 

Jongin nodded. “I'm sorry for coming into your bed. I do it sometimes when I'm asleep… I don't know why…” 

“Don't worry about it.” 

Jongin smiled a little wider. “Are you hungry? Breakfast already started but we can still make it for the end. Food will be cold though.” 

“I'm not actually. I think I ate too many eggs last night.” 

Mark laughed at the memory. “I nearly burned our ship down twice because of all that cooking.” 

“You almost burned my food more than twice.” Jongin replied laughing as well. 

“We'll do you want to get up anyway and go see everyone? I'm sure they're all interested in seeing the mysterious guest on board.” 

Jongin blushed some and his smile dropped. When Mark noticed he was quick to comfort. “Don't worry. If anyone is bothering you I'll get them to leave. You can lean on me, count on me, all the thing that are required I will do them.” 

Jongin chuckled and shook his head. “You should put a shirt on first though.” 

Mark couldn't help but laugh out loud at Jongin's comment. 

***

Later that morning Jongin found that everyone was in fact interested in his arrival. Mark told him earlier that Chanyeol was keeping everyone on board until the ship reaches Chansai in the eastern lands, which meant that Jongin would be spending at least 14 days with these people. The thought itself frightened him just enough that he chose to cling to Mark the entire time. 

Jongin found Mark made him laugh. Not like the small giggle that Jongin usually allowed, but a large chest rumbling type laugh that Jongin was honestly so embarrassed about it every time he made the sound. He also found however, that Mark didn't mind his loud laughter and even joined him. Jongin really liked this about Mark. 

Mark began laughing at something Bambam had said and Jongin, who's missed the actually funny comment, smiled and turned his head slightly. He saw Chanyeol there, staring at him with the same intensity as he was staring the day before. Jongin had to quickly look away to stop the blush from noticeably spreading across his cheeks (though he was fairly certain it didn't work). 

Mark quickly noticed Jongin's discomfort and immediately began talking to him. “Jongin are you okay?” 

“No, I just…” Jongin didn't know exactly how to explain his feelings, so he just let his voice trail off.

Mark didn't mind and simply just continued to gently rub Jongin's back. Jongin appreciated the gesture, but couldn't keep himself from thinking of Chanyeol. 

***

The rest of the day was spent with Mark showing Jongin all the most important parts of the ship and Jongin feeling both fascinated, but also sick to his stomach. Jongin, whenever he saw or even simply thought of the captain of this ship, he felt this strong feeling in his chest and stomach. He wanted to be near Chanyeol, wanted to touch him and hear that his voice again. Jongin wasn't sure what to do with this feeling however, because Chanyeol seemed to not want anything to do with Jongin. Perhaps Chanyeol realized how shy and awkward Jongin was and didn't find it attractive. Or maybe it was how he looked… Jongin didn't know what it was about him that made Chanyeol go from happy to upset enough to leave the room. All of this made Jongin feel sick. However, Mark helped to calm the turning in his stomach. 

*** 

Later that same day, around dinner time Jongin noticed Chanyeol standing on his own, looking out at the ocean. He couldn't explain what took over him in that moment if he tried, but Jongin suddenly found himself walking toward the man. It was a bold move for him, especially considering his stomach did backflips whenever Chanyeol was near. Usually that alone would be enough to make Jongin entirely afraid of him. However, once Jongin was behind Chanyeol he felt the sinking feeling of fear creep up inside him, constricting his voice. Chanyeol must've felt his presence as he sharply turned around. “Can't you see I'm trying to be alone? What do you-” he stopped once he saw Jongin standing there. 

Jongin wanted to speak up, but his voice was lost somewhere beneath the fear and embarrassment he felt, so instead he looked down. He knew Chanyeol was staring at him, he felt it, but the other wasn't saying anything. They remained standing a couple feet from each other in silence. Nothing more than the ocean breeze and the tumbling waves making sound. “Do you need something?” Chanyeol asked suddenly in a tone much gentler than what Jongin was expecting. 

Jongin looked up, but the moment his eyes met Chanyeol's he looked back down again. They stood silent again for a few minutes until Jongin spoke up. “You just looked lonely. I don't know what I was thinking, I'm sorry-” 

Jongin turned to leave, but Chanyeol, rather tightly, grabbed his arm and pulled him back. They stood once again, staring silently at each other. Jongin was too shocked to know what to say and Chanyeol had a thousand thoughts running through his brain making it too hard to speak properly. Chanyeol let go of Jongin's arm when he noticed his grip was tightening and Jongin looked in pain. Jongin rubbed at the spot Chanyeol had been holding, then ran off as fast and as far as could. 

 

~~~

Author's Note: I promise they'll have a real convo soon!! Also the strong feelings are for a reason, which I will reveal sometime in the future (I dunno, I don't plan stuff) Side note: if you haven't already you should go check out the other story I'm writing (also ChanKai-I'm trash for it) - Its called Wolves and Thieves and it's sci-fi af so go check it out if you're into that. Extra Side Note: I'm awkward as hell and can't really write but what's done is done, it's out there now.... That's all for now, experience love and friendship and tacos because tacos are good. This is weird. I'm sorry. I should go. I'll go. I can let myself out....

Like this story? Give it an Upvote!
Thank you!

Comments

You must be logged in to comment
Passerby127 #1
Chapter 39: oh so it was a indeed dream ! ok ok ok ok ...
Kaiho attract me more than it should ... sorry channie but you're slow take all your time XD
anyway I wonder of they gonna do it or suho will ask for chanyeol head on a silver plate to Kai or maybe both ! Please update very soon ><
blooddragon
#2
Chapter 39: I like the kaiho dynamic even though it's so wrong.
blooddragon
#3
Chapter 38: Good action scene. I imagine it's a dream.
Passerby127 #4
Chapter 38: welcome back and happy new year !
Aaaah well I am excited XD
Can't wait for the next chapter !
Passerby127 #5
Chapter 37: oh and sukai relationship too ! how will channie react ? please update very soon >u<
Passerby127 #6
Chapter 37: oooh so exciting! I can't wait for channie to meet Kai !
Passerby127 #7
Chapter 36: omg where did Jongin go !? I seriously can't wait to know !
Passerby127 #8
Chapter 35: Aye stuck between 2 bastards ... poor Nini .
Zico story is so freakin horrible T_T