Jongin: Kill Your Mind, Destroy Your Soul

Call to the Sea

Jongin was in tears the entire time Suho led him back to the ship. The memories of the things Chanyeol did floated through his brain. He was shown two more memories after he was shown what happened to Zico before he had to stop. The old man barely seemed physically able to continue, showing Jongin and Suho his memories seemed to take a toll on him, but he didn’t want to stop, he wanted some else to see the person Chanyeol really was, not who he pretended to be.

 

As Jongin walked through the village, back towards to the ship he made a mental note of all of the buildings and how they looked different from the old man’s memories, like they were destroyed and rebuilt; It was more evidence that Chanyeol really did set a fire that killed plenty of people and destroyed what little they had.

 

Jongin couldn’t see any of evidence of Chanyeol raiding the village, but his mind told him it had to be true.

 

All of this served to only further the pain flowing through Jongin’s body. The sense of betrayal was unbearable, he wanted nothing more than an actual knife to pierce his heart, ending his sorrow in a swift motion, as opposed to the slow breaking he felt inside.

 

***

 

Jongin felt no comfort in Suho's touch, but he leaned into it anyway because it was something. He allowed Suho to hold him with no resistance, not because he wanted the warmth the other seemed to be lacking, but because he missed the warmth he felt in Chanyeols fingertips. Jongin felt knots in his stomach and he was certain he'd throw up if this feeling inside him continued.

 

“Jongin…” Chanyeol’s voice suddenly sang inside his mind. He sounded panicked, but Jongin didn't make much note of it.

 

“Go away.” Jongin thought, hoping Chanyeol was there to hear him.

 

“Jongin, where are you now?” Chanyeol continued as if he hadn't even heard Jongin's words.

 

“We've returned to our ship. We have already set sail.”

 

“Damn it.” Chanyeol growled. “I will find you again and I will save you, I promise.”

 

“Do you promise like when you promised you'd never lie to me? Or when you said you love me?”

 

“I have never lied to, I do love you Jongin, what are you talking about?”

 

Jongin scoffed through his tears. “What?” Suho asked softly.  

 

“I'm just thinking of how naive I've been. I'm so stupid.”

 

Suho cupped Jongin’s face sweetly, too sweetly for Jongin. “Chanyeol is a devil. You cannot blame yourself for having fallen victim to a devil’s trickery.”

 

“Jongin, talk to me.” Chanyeol said beggingly.

 

“If I wasn't so weak it never would've happened.” Jongin felt hot tears burning his eyes again. “I never would've trusted you, if I could have seen the truth.”

 

“Jongin please, it's not real, you've got to believe me.” Chanyeol cried, his voice breaking apart at the harshness of Jongin's words.

 

“You are weak.” Suho said.

 

Jongin looked off into the distance as he fought his tears. “I'm weak.” he thought.

 

“Jongin no!” Chanyeol said. “You're not, y-you're brave, Jongin listen to me. Please!”

 

“You're pathetic.” Suho said.

 

“I'm pathetic.” Jongin repeated the words Suho said to himself, to Chanyeol.

 

“A coward.”

 

“A coward.”

 

“You'll die before you'll ever stop being what you are.”

 

“I'll die like this.”

 

“Jongin, stop this.” Chanyeol begged, his voice indicative of him crying.

 

“You don't want to be weak anymore do you?”

 

“I don't want to be this way anymore.”

 

Both men heard Jongin's words loud a clear. Suho smiled and Chanyeol screamed, but Jongin couldn't hear him anymore. He was gone from Jongin's mind. Everything but Suho's words were gone from his mind.

 

***

 

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Youngjae asked.

 

Jongin wasn't sure. In fact, he was actually terrified of what was coming next.

 

The ship had done what Youngjae called “portal jumping” to a frightening island in the middle of the sea, devoid completely of people. It was dark even though the sun was still at its highest point, but the treetops too thickly covered the sky for much sun to show though.

 

When they had first arrived Jongin was nearly shaking with fear, but his determination to stop being the weak, naive, coward he is outweighed that doubt and fear.

 

Youngjae, by order of Suho, led Jongin to a small shelter that was hidden by various types of foliage. When they entered Youngjae snapped his fingers and a bunch of torches simultaneously lit themselves, illuminating everything around them. Jongin looked astounded and Youngjae simply just smiled in amusement.

 

The walls were all lined with shelves that held thousands of books, potions and hundreds of other things Jongin couldn't even identify.

 

Now, Youngjae had just finished mixing some sort of potion out of various types of herbs and liquids and was currently holding two vials out in front of him towards Jongin.

 

Jongin took a deep, shaky breath in attempt to calm himself, though it did.t help much. “What do they do?”

 

“I've told you three times.” Youngjae replied.

 

“Then tell me four.” Jongin demanded, a little more harshly than he intended.

 

“This,” Youngjae held up the vial filled with red liquid. “Is a potion that I will pour over your body so any wound you receive within the next six hours will instantly heal itself.”

 

Jongin sighed again, he still could barely believe such a thing existed. He wondered how long Youngjae could make the potion last.

 

“And this,” he held up the vial of nearly clear liquid. “Will enhance you knowledge of weaponry and fighting.”

 

“I don't know anything about fighting.” Jongin whispered, to himself more than to Youngjae.

 

“You will after this.” Youngjae replied.

 

***

 

The moment Jongin confirmed he was ready Youngjae simultaneously poured both of the liquids over his head. The stuff was cold and seemed to cover his entire body from head to toe in a matter of seconds, though Jongin wasn't entirely sure how such a thing could be possible. Something about the potions felt both, amazing, exhilarating even, while also feeling painful, enough so that Jonginnearly felt the need to scream out for help.

 

His body began to shake, or rather tremble, so suddenly Jongin nearly collapsed on to the ground. Youngjae grabbed his arm to help steady Jongin's body until the involuntary movements ceased. “Holy .” Jongin gasped.

 

“How do you feel?”

 

“Like my head is going to explode…” Jongin replied, breathily.

 

“Listen, it's the magic, it's filling your body and your mind with the knowledge of every skilled fighter to have lived in Old Tyria.”

 

“The City of Ruins?” Jongin gasped, still trying to catch his breath as he the feeling of scorching fire continued burning under his skin.

 

He had some knowledge of the old city. Many people in his village said the place was a legend, but Jongin had book that said otherwise. He tried to recall as much as he could about the people who lived there before their entire city was destroyed by the New Kings, but he continued turning up blanks in the midst of his pain.

 

“They were known as some of the most skilled fighters in all the world Jongin. I chose it for you, so you'll have more than what I've given the others on the ship.”

 

“Why would you do that?” Jongin questioned, still trying to regain his breath.

 

“You don't deserve what this life will bring you. I wanted to at least give a fighting chance the only way I could.”

 

Youngjae looked away. “You can't tell them. If they find out I gave you this, my life could be in danger.”

 

Jongin nodded in understanding, just as Suho entered the cave. “Is he ready?” Suho questioned.

 

Youngjae took a look at Jongin and Jongin forced himself to stand up straight. “Yes.” Jongin said. “I'm ready.”

 

***

 

Youngjae had shown a small look of concern for Jongin as Suho led him away, but not one large enough for Suho to notice.

 

Jongin didn't feel different, not even a little bit and that was frightening to him. What if the potion Youngjae had given him didn't work? Would he really die tonight? Did he make the wrong decision not trusting Chanyeol and following Suho?

 

The right decision didn't matter now though, Jongin was being led inside of a giant cage inside of a completely different cave. Jongin momentarily wondered how many hidden caves were on his hidden island. Suho grabbed Jongin's shoulder and forced him to turn around. “Over there are your weapons, choose wisely Jongin.”

 

Jongin looked to his left at the wall of swords, knives, hammers and tons of other things Jongin suddenly realized he knew the name of. He shook his head, adjusting to the feeling that was suddenly inside him as he approached the wall, staring down and tracing his fingers over each weapon.

 

There was a set of daggers with two razor sharp prongs curving from the hilt. When Jongin ran his fingers over one of the blades the name came to him. Sai. He thought. The blades in particular seemed to call to him, a weapon that didn't always have to be used to cause death. Jongin grasped each of the leather wrapped hilts and pulled the matching blades off of the wall.

 

Jongin felt something inside of him as his hands curled around the weapon that he couldn't ever describe even if he made an effort. It was like his entire body was filled with a fierce and intense electricity that flowed like lava through his blood and seeped into his bones until he was one with his weapons. He inhaled once before he saw Kris walking towards him.

 

The tall, silent man stalked towards Jongin like a tiger that was about to devour its prey. He held a long sword in one hand; a traditional Chansai craft if Jongin wasn't mistaken, and something inside him knew he wasn't. Normally Jongin would be terrified of the entire situation, his regret would be churning his stomach, sickening him to the core. Not now. Now, all that occupied Jongin’s mind was the feeling of his weapons in his hands and the way Kris moved.

 

Jongin watched Kris with they eyes of a hawk. Every twitch of the older man's fingers, every breath drawn, every motion of the blade he was holding, every slight sway of his body. Every single detail of the other man was soaked into Jongin's brain. He leaned slightly to the left which meant one of two things; he's either left handed or wants Jongin to think he is.

 

God this is weird. Jongin thinks as he momentarily realizes he knows exactly what to do, what every move made by him or Kris mean, all without really knowing. It's all there inside his brain, he can think it, he can feel it, but it feels like none of it is really his.

 

Jongin shakes the thoughts out of his brain in favor of blocking the attack Kris suddenly threw at him.

 

Jongin made a note of how strong Kris was. He seemed to be putting every bit of his strength into each swing of his sword and each kick or punch he tossed Jongin's way. Jongin himself, has blocked or dodged every single one of Kris's defenses. It's almost involuntary how Jongin moves; his body moving of its own accord before he even has to think about it.

 

The two continue like that for some amount of time lost to both of them. Kris keeps swinging his blade in ways that could potentially be fatal to Jongin if he doesn't move or block the blade. Jongin on the other hand, hasn't felt it right to do anything other than just block Kris's attacks.

 

Jongin smirks when he sees out of the corner of his eye Kris drawing longer breaths, tossing sloppier punches and throwing more weight into the once seemingly calculated motion of his weapon.

 

Upon seeing Jongin's smirk, Kris finds himself filling with rage. Jongin kicks him in the stomach, knocking him backwards, nearly to the ground. Kris growls and lunges in Jongin's direction.

 

It happens before Kris even realizes it. He's being lifted from the ground and flipped through the air, the head of one of Jongin's blades is pushing into his chest, shattering a couple of his ribs. Then, as reality catches back up with Kris he's on the ground, a thin cut has been sliced across his right cheek just below his eye and hes almost entirely out of breath. Kris, in his entire life, has never seen someone do such a thing before, especially do a much larger and stronger opponent.

 

Jongin pushes his foot against Kris's throat and pushes down. “Do you surrender?” Jongin said, more fiercely than anything else Kris had ever heard from the younger’s mouth.

 

Kris spared a glance to his right. The entire crew of the ship was gathered around a sadistically smiling Suho. Most of them looked unamused and Youngjae looked almost sad; the boy never did like the outcome of these fights. Kris also noticed his sword was just a few inches away from his arm, if he could grab it he'd win. Kris looked back up at Jongin who was waiting ever so patiently for his reply.

 

Kris felt Jongin's foot push down harder then ease up just a little as he grew a little more impatient. Kris waited until Jongin finally leaned down and growled his question once more. “I,” Kris sighed and struggled around some, which seemed to please Jongin enough that he relieved some of the pressure on Kris's throat. “I do not.” Kris growled, finally reaching the hilt of his sword, just enough that he could slam the end into Jongin's left temple.

 

Jongin fell off of Kris, entirely surprised by the action. Kris pulled a dagger from his boot aimed the thing towards Jongin's heart, but the younger was quick to move away. He wasn't quick enough to avoid the blade however. The small thing plunged deep into his upper arm and shoulder at an angle that definitely would be damaging. Kris silently thanked Youngjae for ensuring Jongin's wounds would heal. Still, Kris knew the scar there would be a nasty one. He supposed that was good though, Suho did like when his toys looked a little rough. Hopefullu it'd be enough to keep Jongin out of the ring after this.

 

Jongin ripped the blade from his arm with a groan and threw it Kris's way. Kris leaned out of the blades path, but he still felt the edge of the blade ripping through his ear. He cursed to himself and waited as Jongin swung his chosen weapons in Kris's direction. The pain that no doubtedly came from the wound in his arm seemed to be hindering the younger just enough that Kris was finally able to get a few hits in.

 

Growing bored of the seemingly too matched fight, Suho stood up. “Finish this!” he screamed.

 

Jongin looked at him, distracted and Kris took the chance. Kris's blade swung around, slicing at Jongin's leg and then moving to his throat. He pulled Jongin's back up against his chest, making sure his blade was marking Jongin's throat just a little, he hoped not enough to scar. “You will surrender or you will die.” Kris growled. “I will cut you into pieces faster than your body will heal. Believe me, I've tested Youngjae’s potion before, it doesn't always work.” Kris dug a nail into the wound on Jongin's arm for emphasis, after all the kid didn't know the moment they stepped out of this cage it would be healed.

 

Jongin attempted to struggling free of Kris's grip, but Kris held him there with ease. After staring at Suho's rageful eyes, Jongin whispered his surrender. Kris pushed him away, leaving Jongin on his hands and knees then walked towards the exit of the cage.

 

Before Jongin had time to wallow in the shame he suddenly felt rising inside him, Suho was at his side, pulling him up some and kissing his lips. Jongin felt numb to the action. “You did so well my pet.” Suho said.

 

“I failed.” Jongin replied lowly.

 

“You fought as Jongin, pet.” Suho said. “Jongin is a failure. He will always fail, and until the day Jongin dies, you will always fail.”

 

“I don't want to be Jongin anymore!” Jongin screamed. “I hate how weak I am!”

 

Jongin slammed his fist into the ground in his anger. Jongin felt an odd sense of pleasure from the pain that coursed up his arm. “Then don't be Jongin anymore. You are already reborn in body, become reborn in your mind.”

 

Jongin understood what Suho meant and he spent probably too much time in his thoughts before he whispered his answer. Suho leaned closer to hear him better. “Kai. Kai is the name of a king, a warrior. Kai is strong.” Jongin said. “I will be Kai.”

 

Suho smiled. “I'm pleased to meet you Kai. Welcome home.”

 
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Passerby127 #1
Chapter 39: oh so it was a indeed dream ! ok ok ok ok ...
Kaiho attract me more than it should ... sorry channie but you're slow take all your time XD
anyway I wonder of they gonna do it or suho will ask for chanyeol head on a silver plate to Kai or maybe both ! Please update very soon ><
blooddragon
#2
Chapter 39: I like the kaiho dynamic even though it's so wrong.
blooddragon
#3
Chapter 38: Good action scene. I imagine it's a dream.
Passerby127 #4
Chapter 38: welcome back and happy new year !
Aaaah well I am excited XD
Can't wait for the next chapter !
Passerby127 #5
Chapter 37: oh and sukai relationship too ! how will channie react ? please update very soon >u<
Passerby127 #6
Chapter 37: oooh so exciting! I can't wait for channie to meet Kai !
Passerby127 #7
Chapter 36: omg where did Jongin go !? I seriously can't wait to know !
Passerby127 #8
Chapter 35: Aye stuck between 2 bastards ... poor Nini .
Zico story is so freakin horrible T_T