“Tell me. What did you do all the time until now?“, Seokjin asked and took one of the chocolates on the table.

“This and that. As you can see we moved...“

Jongin placed his hands in his lap and stared nervously at them.

“Yes. Obviously. Could intergrate yourself quickly?“, he smiled and swallowed the sweets.

Jongin didn't touch anything. It could break.

“Yes. Found some kind guys...“, he mumbled and massages his fingers.

“How are your parents?“

The younger boy's head shot upwards and he did he best to hide his tears.

“Uhm... My mother is fine...“, he started and gulped the lump in his dry throat down.

“And yours?“, he added before Seokjin could ask him any questions.

His cousin looked sightly confused but answered anyways.

“The are quite fine. Thanks for asking... may I ask why you and your family moved?“

Jongin didn't want to answer his cousin's question.

“Does it matter? I'm here! And we have got the chance to talk again!”, he tried to avoid to give a right answer.

“Jongin...”, the older boy sighed and leaned forward.

“By the way... I like your flat. It's your own right?”, the shyer one babbled and gazed down.

“Yes but... Jongin...”

“Woah... Where do you work? You have got a huge flat screen!”

For God's sake stop asking!

“You really try to avoid my questions hard. What's wrong. You can talk to me. I hope you know that.”

How would I be able to talk to you?! I have seen you about two times in my whole life. Stop acting like we are best brothers!

“I know. There is nothing.”

“Of course there is!”, Seokjin grumbled, suddenly straightened his back and yawned.

Jongin couldn't help. He was kind of a magnet for becoming nervous and unsure.

What the hell. Stop panicking, jerk.

“I have to go.”

Jongin stood up quickly.

“But-”

“We can talk later. Now that I live here.” He buried his fingernails in his jeans and breathed out.

Liar.

“Ehm. Of course.”, Seokjin answered confused.

❆       ❆      ❆

“Jongin. Where have you been all day?”, his mother's scratchy voice welcomed him as he entered their little flat. It was a wonder that Jongin didn't get lost in the catastrophe outside.

“I met Seokjin. He invited me and … yeah. We went to his flat.”

Kind of sad that his cousin's flat was as big as all the flats counted together in which his mother and Jongin have lived in.

“Seokjin? Your cousin? How is he? I haven't seen him for years!”

How to calm your mother down. The Jongin way.

“He is fine.” Jongin went straight to his room. Not wanting to talk to anybody. That wasn't even difficult since there was only his mother.

In his (still almost empty) room the first thing he did was laying down and thinking.

He just threw himself on the mattress and stared at the ceiling trying not to cry.

Why do I start panicking all the time?

Why am I not able to tell the truth?

Why am I such a good-for-nothing?

He thought of the angry glances of Kyungsoo. His mean words. Their teacher's reaction.

Everywhere I go people hate me.

Jongin wanted to turn the damn time back. He wanted to go to the kindergarten again.

At that times his world was safe and funny.

Even though he kind of felt released after throwing the little stone away this afternoon he didn't want to live in the present anymore.

Why is karma so cruel?

Jongin sighed. He felt tears coming up as he thought of the worst day in his entire life.

“Jongin my son. How was kindergarten?”

The tall man the small boys back and smiled.

“It was fine! I found some really nice friends! I'm so happy!”

The small boy looked up right into the man's face with happiness shining all over his face.

“I'm glad you liked it! Now common. Mommy has cooked your favorite meal.”

His eyes became huge and he stared at his father's face.

“Buldak *?”, he asked excited and received a short nod as an answer.

“Yaaayyy! Let's go home! I want go home! I'm so happy! Common!”

The small boy jumped a few times before running away.

“Jongin! Please don't run! The street is really dangerous!”

The man had difficulties to follow the small boy. The boy ran over the street.

“Jongin! Stop!”, the man shouted and ran faster to prevent the upcoming accident.

They both heard a loud brake squeaking and Jongin turned his head. The small boy saw a huge truck and felt himself crashing with the ground.

Totally feared he shut his eyes tightly. He felt the cold and rough tar under his tiny body.

His legs and arms were burning and he heard many chaotic voices talking and screaming.

It must have taken life forever until he found some courage to open his eyes.

The big red truck was standing beside them and a crowd was staring shocked down. But the people weren't staring at Jongin.

Jongin wondered why he couldn't feel much pain. His head and some body parts hurt but besides he felt quite okay.

“Is he dead?” “Someone call the doctor!” “Isn't there anybody who could help?”
The little boy blinked confused. He was okay. There was no need to worry.

He sat himself on his knees which were burning like hell but otherwise he couldn't get an overview.

He turned his head to the right and realized that he was right next to a warm body.

A warm and wet body.

“DADDY!”, he shouted as he recognized the man.

“DADDY DON'T SLEEP! WAKE UP! IT'S NOT EVEN NIGHT! DADDY PLEASE!”

The boy hugged his father not caring about all the blood.

“Daddy please. We wanted to eat Buldak. Mommy is waiting. Wake up. Don't sleep.”, he whispered with teary eyes.

He didn't get an answer.

“I know I'm annoying and I know that I make you and mommy tired. But don't sleep here. Sleep at home. The peoples are staring at us!”

Meanwhile Jongin's whole body was covered with his father's blood who still didn't move in any way.

“I'm sorry to tell you Mrs. Kim...but...”, the doctor with the scrub started. His mouth was covered with a mask so only his woeful eyes could be seen.

Jongin held his mother's hand tightly and stared upwards.

“Mr. Kim... has left us. I'm sorry.”

Silence. Jongin didn't understand.

“Is he still sleeping? Did I making so tired?”, he asked with big and sad eyes. He could feel his mothers arm around him.

“Yes he is sleeping. And he won't wake up early.”, she answered with an under pressed sob.

“Oh okay. Tell me when he wakes up! I want to eat Buldak with him.”

“Appa. I'm so sorry.” Jongin covered his mouth with a palm and felt a sob coming up.

Now that he was old enough of course he knew his father was dead. Even worse he knew that it was his own fault.

He turned his body to the left and hugged his teddy bear.

His mother never told him that his father woke up.

____________________________________________________________

(* Buldak is a chicken meal :D just like Oppa loves it :3)

I have you warn you all... I LOVE DRAMA xDD!

I probably will always destroy everything that Wootae tries to create xD. Oh and yaaass I love you too. omg cheesy moments.

Btw I removed that "Subscribers Only" can read this. It shouldn't be forced. 

Chaeyo ♥