The first page was dated the first morning after I left.

"She left last night. I didn't want her to leave, but why did I let it happen? Her words cut through me like a knife. I've let her down. I've hurt her. I've made her cry. I broke my promise. 'I can never believe we are falling out of love under the full moon too.' It repeats. No. I still love her, a lot. Does she still love me? We're not falling out of love. I'm not letting that happen. The thought of her filing a divorce scared me. I rose up from bed early, not used to waking up to an empty bed. I dressed up for a long time, wanting to look good when I come and see her. But my feet won't move. I don't have the face to see her. It's shameful. I'm shameful. I ended up sitting on our bed, all dressed up. It was then when auntie came. And gave me this journal. She asked me to write everything I'm feeling, to atleast get it off my chest. 'You've been too strong, Kai. You need to cry, sometimes. It's not a sign of weakness.' She told me before she left."

Finishing the first page, my heartbeat ran wild. I looked out, on the hallway, but there was no one. Feeling like breaking down any minute, I ran inside and locked our door.

Hugging the journal, I tiptoed my way to my room and sat on the bed.

I took a deep breath and turned it to the second entry.

"Why did I blame her? It wasn't her fault. I already lost marshmallow, I can't lose my wife too. I need to see her. Like yesterday, it took me a long time to choose my clothes. I need to look good infront of her. I stepped outside our house and drove to aunt's home. I stopped my car infront of their building. I can't get off. What will I say? Immersed in thinking, the sun has set without me noticing. I drove back home, failing to see her. How will I talk to her? How will I say sorry? I thought of that, and this journal. Auntie didn't give this to me for no reason."

"Stupid Kai.." I said to myself, sniffing.

"Soojung, I'm sorry. You must be in a lot of pain. Now that I think of it, I didn't even ask how you were when you were discharged. I'm sorry. I know it's late, but, how are you? I'm sorry, I wasn't there when you needed me the most. I'm sorry for being such a jerk. I'm sorry for not keeping my words. I love you, Krystal. I'm sorry."

By this time, the journal was aready wet. Wet from my tears.

The last entry was shorter.

"I'll get back on my feet. I'll start again. Soojung, wait for me a little bit. I'll be better, I'll be stronger for us. Just a little bit."

I don't think I'm ready to take him back, if ever he comes to me. The damage has been done. Yes, I love him. But of course, I need to heal my wounds first, and I think it's going to take a long time.

I sat on my bed, dazed. I'm not dreaming, am I?

*Tock*

I closed the book.

*Tock*

What is that?

*Tock*

I looked at my window, it felt like deja vu.

*Tock*

I stood up, and looked out.

KAI.

--------

Did you look out your window? IT'S FULL MOON TONIGHT!

Tonight's chapter is short, but I'll update tomorrow evening!

Thank you for all the comments! I got so excited reading all of it! =))

I may not reply but, I'm reading every single comment

xoxo,

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