“WHAT GREATER THING IS THERE FOR TWO HUMAN SOULD THAN TO FEEL THAT THEY ARE JOINED, TO STRENGTHEN EACH OTHER, TO BE AT ONE WITH EACH OTHER IN SILENT UNSPEAKABLE MEMORIES.” – George Eliot

DONGHAE POV

“You don’t need to come home, mama I’m more than fine now. Besides isn’t Mr. Kim’s job requires him to be there until the end of the year? I wouldn’t want to be the reason for him to abandon it.”

“I should have been there the moment the news came out. Don't worry about my husband, he knows both you and Lixu are my priorities. I’m waiting for my medical clearance now and by the end of the day I will be boarding the plane to Korea.”

“But mama–”

“No more of that, Donghae-ah. I’ll be coming home whether you like it or not. Is Hyukjae okay?”

“Yup, he’s fine. His mom is staying with us for the time being. There’s so much going on right now and I wanted them and Lixu to be safe. What time is your arrival?”

“Tomorrow, 12:10 pm.”

“I’ll see you at Incheon then. Have a safe flight. I love you.”

“Are you sure everything is fine, son? The news says otherwise.”

“You know its part of being a public figure, mama.”

“We’ll have a long talk about this when I get there. I have to go. Bye, son. I love you too.”

“Bye, mama.”

Once the call has ended, I pocketed my phone and turn back my attention to my manager.

“Hyung, are you still mad about me being gay?” I asked the man whose attention is focused on driving.

He paid me a quick look before turning his head back to the road. “I’m not homophobic, Donghae-ah. You know that’s not the reason I’m upset.”

“Is this about me keeping our relationship secret then? I’m sorry hyung.”

We stop by the stoplight enabling him to turn his full attention to me. “I’ve been suspicious about the two of you since our Brazil trip but I chose not to say anything and continue being a mere observant. I got my suspicions confirmed in your Japan encore.”

“You knew I’m already dating Hyukjae yet you insisted for me to be part of Rachel’s fashion show. Care to explain why hyung?”

The stoplight turns green and our car starts moving again. “I said it then, and I’m saying it again. You need to hear her explanation. Not for a possible reconciliation but for the wounds to close and be healed completely.”

“With the current happenings I doubt that it is possible, hyung.”

“I know that’s why I will not push this topic to you ever again. You have so much in your plate right now and to add yet another is plainly stupid and inconsiderate of me. I just wanted to let you know that if you needed me, I’ll always be here, just like the old times.” He then flashed his signature dimpled smile and I sighed in relief.

“Thank you hyung, thank you so much.”

-----*****-----

The conference hall is filled with at least 20 different media reporters from Korea and around Asia. There are flashes of camera everywhere as some of them keep on calling my name but in the end I ignored them and directly went to the table with more than 10 microphones taped together to record whatever it is that I will be saying. I gulp down a good amount of water before giving my spectators the best poker face I could muster.

“Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen.” Leeteuk hyung greeted. “On behalf of CJE Entertainment I would like to thank you all for making it today in just a short notice. Each of you will be granted with one question each and they’ll be no follow-up questions. We placed a strip of paper underneath your chair and whoever has the red one will get to ask Mr. Lee last with same rules applied. If you have no further questions, let’s start the interview.” He then went down the flat form as the questioning began.

A Chinese looking man rose from his seat and bowed. “Good afternoon, Donghai. My name is James Wu and I’m representing Shanghai Daily. I would like to ask about the rumor of your retirement.”

“Even before I debuted, I had set my mind that I will not be a permanent figure in the industry. That I have to be man enough to face new challenges outside the world I’ve grown accustomed with. As you all know, I am 25 and to me that’s the perfect age to discover new things. No, that’s not a rumor because the moment I have completed One Day and comply with my other commitments, I will be stepping down my spot and give way to the next generation of stars.”

Gasps of astonishment echoed inside the conference hall but it only lasted for a minute as the second reporter made himself known. “Cha Minwoo from Korea Daily News. Is it true that you and Rachel Kim had an affair earlier in your career?”

Is it safe for me to answer his question? Will I be jeopardizing her current relationship? I weigh my options well before answering.

“What we had will always be part of who I am today. I’d like to keep it that way. Next question please.”

I had answered a handful other questions before the person who was able to get the red strip looks at me with a flirtatious smile.

“Asumi Takahashi from Avex News Portal.” A female reporter introduced herself. I must admit she looks good even in a simple shirt and jeans. “I’d like to ask about your current relationship status. Are you dating someone Donghae-san?”

When I went to Mokpo, I had the opportunity to think about my life, past and present, good and bad. Before I met Hyukjae I only think about myself and how to maintain my career. Even my position in Lee Holdings was not that important though I made myself available whenever the company needs me. For years my career has been my number one priority and I will do anything to protect it. But after meeting him, confiding in him, loving him, I found out that there’s more to life that I’ve been missing. That forgiveness and acceptance will bring me happiness and contentment. At this point in my life wherein I have to protect more people, it’ll be beneficial to say the truth.

“I’m not engaged yet, but I’m currently in a relationship. I wanted this news to come straight from me than letting other people do it.”

I let the reporters breathe before clearing my throat. This is the point wherein they have to be more attentive. I had asked my agency to arrange this press conference not just to answer questions but also to have a statement, to clear speculations and to put an end to nonsensical gossips floating around the social media.

“Before we part ways I’d like to clear some things regarding the reason I went missing for three days. First, my agency, CJE Entertainment, had nothing to do with it and they didn’t kick me out. I’ve been in real stress the past few days because of personal reasons and it has nothing to do with the management. My relationship with almost all the people in CJE, then and now, didn’t change. Second, I didn’t left the country for those three days of missing. I stayed in a private villa and I didn’t do partying. Lastly, I would like to apologize for the inconvenience I’ve brought to my One Day family, my management, and my fans. My action caused quite a trouble to you guys and I have no intention to justify my unprofessionalism. I hope you find it in your heart to forgive me.” I push back the chair and bowed. “Thank you all for lending me your ears. Have a good day.” 

-----*****-----

3:30 pm, Lee Mansion

When I arrived home, Hyuk’s mom greeted me. She’s been lounging in the living room, reading a book with a matching cup of coffee. I’m grateful to her because when Hyuk and I asked her if she would live with us for a while, she agreed immediately. It made me feel accomplished because I got to keep them safe from Siwon and his crazy . We shared a short talk before she shooed me away to where her son is – entertainment room. 

The room is dim lighted and cold from the air conditioner. I padded my way towards the couch and a sleeping Hyukjae greeted me. Maybe he fell asleep after watching the press conference. My missing in action caused a lot of inconvenience yes, but it also made our relationship went up a notch. We make sure to share whatever it is that bothers us, our future plans, our fears and insecurities.

Leaning forward, I placed a kiss on top of his hair as I tap his cheek to wake him up.

“Wake up sleepyhead. We have places to