I shouldn't.
You're a butthead ≧◠◡◠≦✌
Seulmin's POV
After the moment we had, we got distracted by the phone ringing. I picked up the phone and expect it to be Youngjae, of course it's him right?
Me: Yoboseyo?
Youngjae: Jagiya~ Where are you now?
Me: Oh Youngjae oppa! I'm at home.
Youngjae: Can I visit you?
Me: No...no.
Youngjae: Eh? Wae?
Me: I..um..cause it's late now. Look...at the clock! It's 12 midnight already!
Youngjae: Aish, too bad. Go to sleep early okay, babe?
Me: Yeah, I will oppa! Don't worry. Good night, sleep tight! Don't let the bed bugs bite you, and sweet dreams! Hehe!
Youngjae: Okay, I'll make sure bed bugs won't bite me! You too! Sweet dreams! Love you~ Bye bye~
I sighed after I hung up the phone, I noticed how much a and playgirl I was. I felt really bad...I slept with Daehyun, kissed his cheeks, cooked him lunch and acted like we're couples. Words just can't describe how a I was right now. I turned around and saw Daehyun's depressed face, pains and sadness in his eyes looking at me. "I'm such a bad person...I slept with you, kissed you on the cheek.. I'm like trying to snatch you away from Youngjae! I'm really really bad," He spatted out his honest words. "No...don't say that! You're not bad at all. The fact is, you're just only jealous, nothing bad! Don't say words that aren't true and bad about yourself," I comforted, walking towards him.
He stared at the clock for minutes, probably lost in thoughts. "What are you thinking?" I sighed, looking at his blank face. "I'm thinking...how would my life be, without you, in it," He answered, looking at me and smiled. "You know what? Stop being so sweet towards me, your words always touched me and I...don't wanna cry in front of you," I said. "How can I not be sweet to the girl who deserved it really much? It's not wrong to cry in front of me, it's happy tears, not sad," He said looking at me again.
"So...when are you going back?" I asked, feeling extremely sad for him to leave, I'll be empty and lonely without him. Wait, what am I thinking? I have Youngjae with me, I don't need Daehyun...I guess. "When will I go back? Probably tonight will be the last, I'll go back tomorrow. How I wish I could stay with you, forever," He sighed. "Oh...don't you wanna get some rest?" I asked, with sadness in my eyes. "Why would I want to? I don't want to lose this precious time for sleeping, instead, I want to spend it with the girl I wanted the most, I don't wanna waste my time. Tomorrow is only in a few more hours," He said, faking a painful smile.
"Daehyun....I'm..sorry," I apologized, and went into his arms for a tight warm hug. Although how much I don't want this moment to end, but life's still going on right? I still have Youngjae..I can't treat him like this can't I? I'll hurt him too much, I don't want to see a single tear fell off Youngjae's eyes, except for the happy tears he had from me. "What are you...sorry for?" He asked, probably feeling confused. "Sorry for making you having bruises everywhere...making you fight with Youngjae.." I told him. "Don't be sorry for me, be sorry for Youngjae! What are you thinking? Youngjae is yours! Don't lose him..he's your first love! Don't make me feel bad...I felt like you were forcing yourself to do it. Be sorry for Youngjae and hate me, I gave him bruises too, I punched and kicked him in the stomach until he cried in the tears of pain. I start all of these first, I scolded him that's why be both fought each other. It's all my fault, it's all mine. Say sorry to him. Not me," He pleaded.
I went extremely speechless by his wisdom words. He's right, Youngjae is my first love and I can't lose him. I should be sorry for both of them, not only at one of them, both. It's because of me that cause all these problems they had and went through, it's because of me!
Why did god wanted to make me appear in this world, the world that it used to be peace, but now, they are now both enemies, they used to be good friends, aren't they? It's all because of me that all problems occurred between us. I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't. I wish I can be lost forever.
Comments