Jessica's POV:)

"Jonghyun, Jonghyun please open up" I cried banging on his door for what seemed like 10 minutes. I was just about to give up and walkway until I heard the door creeped open and saw Jonghyun standing near the door. I was shocked at his appearance, he had rings under his eyes, like he hasn't slept in days, but the thing that caught my attention the most was his red puffy eyes that looked like he was crying.

"Oh it's you, what the do you want?" he said coldly.

"We need to talk Jonghyun" I said walking up to him.

"Have nothing to say to you, not after what you did to me" he said walking inside his mansion. I followed behind him, I wasn't going to leave until I cleared this out to him.

"Please Jonghyun it wasn't my fault, I didn't mean to hurt you like that" I cried grabbing his arm.

"DON'T TOUCH ME WITH YOUR DIRTY HANDS YOU DUMB " he yelled out making me jump. "You know I always thought you were different,that you actually have feelings for me for who I am, but after seeing those pictures your just as dirtier than those other girls at school" he said. His words hit me hard, I felt my heart start to ache more and more. "No that's not true Jonghyun, I love you with all my heart, just please listen to-" "NOT TRUE, NOT TRUE, THEN TELL ME THIS ISN'T TRUE HUH TELL THAT'S NOT YOU HAVING WITH ANOTHER GUY SICA TELL ME?" he yelled, grabbing me by the shoulders and started shaking me violently.

"IT ISN'T TRUE WOULD YOU JUST ING LISTEN TO ME JONGHYUN" I yelled at him as more tears started falling down my cheek. I  could tell from his facial expression, he was shocked that I, his girl friend would yell at him. "THEN TO TELL ME THE TRUTH SICA, TELL ME THE ING TRUTH OF WHY WERE YOU HAVING WITH ANOTHER GUY HUH WHY?" I could see that he was crying about this, he too was hurt. "I-I CAN'T TELL YOU OK, I JUST CAN'T" I cried back,

"I knew it was too good to be true, your a as the rest of them all, I wish I never fell in love with you, we're done, you hear me, done" he said. I fell to my knees and begin to sob, "No Jonghyun please, please don't do this to me, I love you, please don't leave me" I cried as I grabbed on to his pant leg. "Get out, just please get out" he said walking away from me, I stood up and started following him. "I SAID GET OUT" he pulled my arm with brute force and dragged me out the door shutting it infront of my face. This can't be happening, Jonghyun just broke up with me and it was all my fault, it was my damn ing fault. I ran all the way home crying, so this is how it feels like having your heart broken into a million pieces.

I went inside the house and ran upstairs to my room and locked the door. I jumped ontop of my bed and let all the emotions cry out of me. Jonghyun was right, I am a , I let Onew touch me, let him take my ity, what's worse I broke Jonghyun's heart. I let my heart cry out the whole time until it was night time. No matter how much I cry my heart out it never stops, it's like all these lies and all the pain is still there. That's when I remember what Onew said to me, oh no Onew's going to expell Jonghyun and it's all my fault, I curled up on my bed raking with sobs. I just want all this to stop! I’ve had enough! I….I got Jonghyun hurt! Jonghyun I’m so sorry please…forgive me.

I slowly sat up and hugged my legs to my chest I could see myself in my mirror only that wasn’t me that was a a disgusting ! A filthy dirty lying cheating cheap that's what was staring back at me I’m sorry Jonghyun I’m no longer your beautiful princess anymore.

I got up from my bed and walked over to my dresser and picked a hair brush and pegged it at myself in the mirror destroying it into a billion pieces. I covered my face with my arms as the glass shards burst through the entire room. I felt a piece sink into my forearm right where Krystal and her gang beat me up the other day in the girl's bathroom and left me with bruises all over my body. Just thinking about I haven't told anybody what happen that night, Yoona did see me limping in the hall but I lied to her saying that I tripped over something on my way to class.

I removed my arms from my face to check the damage. I could feel that emotion running again. It felt like a giant weight was been relieved from my shoulders. I gripped the shard and ripped it out quick like a bandage. The emotion left faster. There was so much of it inside if me I want it all out faster than this! I placed the shard on my wrist and slid all the way across my skin. I looked at the small cut and watched as the blood bubbled up on from my wrist. It stung a little but it helped make the pain in my heart go away, I quickly placed the shard on my arm and made another cut to help it leave and then another and another and another, over and over till my cuts reached the middle of my arm. It was all finally leaving me, all the lies and secrets were disappearing. It felt so good I needed more! I swooped my other arms and did the same thing till there was no more skin to cut. 

 Each scar I made were straight and perfect. I liked how the way they stung and how they hurt when I ran my fingers over them. I leaned my back against the cold wall that was behing my bed as I watch my very own blood pour out from me staining my bed covers. Oh Jonghyun if only you knew what really happen, then it wouldn't have to come to this. I looked at the star night sky and blinked as I still had some tears running down my cheeks. knock,knock "Jessica, Jessica are you ok?" I heard Yoona say through the door, I quickly my uniform shirt that was covered in blood and put on a long sleeve black shirt and open the door a little just a creaked. I saw Yoona standing infront wearing her worried expression on her face "Yoona could you please leave me alone for a while, right now I wanna be left alone" I said quietly slowly closing my door and locking it.

I slid down to the floor and brought my knees to my chest and begin to cry. Why did this have to happen to me why? It was my fault that Jonghyun broke up with me, it was my fault I have scars all over my arms, it was all mine. I climbed into bed and curled into a ball and let myself cry to sleep as if my whole world was tumbling down.