Eun Ah sped walk to her car after excusing herself when she got a text from Junhong asking her where she was. She completely forgot that she had made plans to visit their apartment today but boy was she glad for the distraction.

Especially after what Kris just laid down on her.

"I spent a lot of time in Korea while Luhan was in China with the rest of EXO M. He met Alice there when he was 15 and fell for her right away. All the members called and told me how Luhan was in love with this great girl. I was skeptical at first especially since Luhan had told her about EXO. I didn't know that she'd be the same girl that I'd fall for."

Eun Ah was frozen stiff still comprehending the fact that Luhan dated, no, was in love with Alice.

"The moment I saw her I was in love. I had come back from China and when I reached the front door, she opened it and I saw her. It took one look, just 10 seconds and I knew I was in love. This mysterious girl that I wanted to be mine and I had no clue why she was at our house. Until I found out she was Luhan's girlfriend."

Eun Ah was holding her breath at this point, her glass of water tightly held in her hand. She felt like she couldn't breathe and this whole conversation was too heavy for her.  

"I tried. I swear I tried to stay away but it was too hard. And it got even harder when she wanted to spend more time with me. Slowly she felt the same way and her feelings for Luhan were fading away. I didn't want it to happen but it did. I pretended that she was just a sister but she forced me to face my feelings. I was in love with my best friend's girlfriend and she loved me back. Sooner or later we both went to Luhan and told him the truth, but I think by then, he already knew what was happening."

"How did he react?"

Kris shrugged, "He didn't really. I knew he was mad but he didn't raise his voice, he didn't scream at us and he didn't cry. He just told us that he thought he trusted us and that he was wrong. He said that he couldn't believe it and just walked away. He avoided us for a few months before he had no choice but to come back and when he did he never talked about it and he never really acted like he cared. I knew things were different but it was confusing when me being around her didn't seem to affect him."

Eun Ah narrowed her eyes, "Well what did you expect him to do? Punch you? Set the house on fire? News flash, you guys had to grow up faster than normal kids. He knew. He knew he couldn't make a big scene out of it so he just had to learn to deal with it. Just because he didn't show he was hurting on the outside didn't mean that everything was fine and dandy on the inside. He was probably losing it when he left the house."

Kris looked down, "I-I know. Himchan called me, it turned out that he and Luhan were pretty good friends and Luhan went to B.A.P's place. Himchan really gave it to me. He wasn't a fan of me stealing his friend's girl."

"Did you feel bad?"

Kris's head snapped up, "Of course I did. So did Alice, all we could do was worry about him. It didn't feel right that me and her were in a relationship and happy due to hurting him. There was a lot of tension between me and her right after. We blamed each other for hurting him."

"Poor you." Eun Ah snapped sarcastically.

"But as time went on me and Alice figured things out and we managed to work it out together and when Luhan came back it was tense, but we were happy. He didn't seemed bothered and he didn't seem like he wanted to talk to us or about what happened so we didn't know what to do. So we just pretended that everything went back to normal, because that's what it seemed like he wanted us to do."

"And then she died." Eun Ah mumbled sadly.

Kris looked away and sighed in guilt. "He never cried or even looked sad. When he heard the news he just nodded and told me to tell when the funeral date gets set. I got mad at him at first for not caring but I learned that he just didn't want to show how hurt he was over his cheating ex. He didn't think she deserved his grievance, but that didn't mean he didn't feel it. He loved her too."

Eun Ah frowned, "Why? Why didn't you just stay away from her? You knew she was taken, why did you still go after her? That should've been enough reason to not be attracted to her. What's wrong with you? Was it worth it in the end? Was it worth losing a brother?"

Kris gaped when he heard her accusing tone. He should've been angry at her but it only made him feel worse about himself. A part of him hoped that she'd take his side.

He deserved this. He deserved choosing his selfish love over a man that was practically a brother.

"I don't know. I-I loved her, I didn't want to  but I couldn't help it."

Eun Ah shook her head at him, "What about now?"

He looked up at her, his eyes drilling into hers with a sort of vulnerability that made her heart squeeze.

"No. Not anymore."

Eun Ah got into her car and Watson immediately jumped on her, at her face as she tried to get into her vehicle.

She took a deep breath and started the car before driving it towards Junhong and Jongup's apartment that wasn't too far from the restaurant.

She didn't know what to think with all this new information, but the one thing she was sure of was that Luhan deserved happiness.

She couldn't believe that someone like him went through that sort of pain, double what Kris had gone through, but managed to stay above water.

It was amazing.

She pulled up to their apartment complex's parking lot and grabbed Watson before making her way up to their apartment. She had no idea why Kris chose to confide in her but she even more confused of what she should do now that she knew this about him.

She didn't know if she was mad or not, but why should she be? His past with Luhan and Alice didn't concern her, but she didn't know why she felt so troubled. Sure, what Kris did was a selfish move, but if he loved Alice anything like she had loved Yongguk, she could sympathize with him.

You couldn't control who you love.

It's not like he wanted to ruin his relationship with Luhan but he must've had something special with Alice to make him put all of that at jeopardy.

But 10 years later, he was over Alice but his relationship with Luhan was still ruined. Was it worth it? His temporary happiness ruined a lifetime of it, just because he was young and stupid and thought he knew what he wanted in life.

And what he wanted wasn't his to begin with.

Was any love worth it?

Eun Ah swallowed when she thought about Yongguk.

Yeah, love was worth it. She was willing to die for him to be safe so she'd risk a lot more for Yongguk.

"Why are you late!" Junhong exclaimed when he swung the door open. Eun Ah made a face and pushed past him.

"I got side tracked but I'm here now." She kicked her shoes off and let Watson jump out of her arms. He sniffed around the house until Jongup walked out of his room and started jumping up and down, scratching at the boy's leg for attention.

"Did you come straight from therapy?" Jongup asked as he bent down to pat Watson's head. Eun Ah appreciated the fact that Jongup was blunt sometimes. He never spoke to her like a glass doll and whenever he talked about her therapy or how she was doing, he'd say it as casually as asking her if she went to the mall.

It made her feel less like an emotional mess and more like a normal human.

"Yeah, sorry I couldn't bring you guys food."

Jongup chortled, "Don't worry, Yoora keeps cooking for Junhong and she sends home a ton left overs for me."

Eun Ah raised her brows and took a seat on the counter. "She's cooking for you? Damn Hong, you caught a good one."

The boy rolled his eyes but the blush on his face was indistinguishable. Ever since she met Yoora, she saw the way Junhong changed. Sure he was the same cute little kid, but he seemed more mature now, it made Eun Ah happy. She'd see Yoora's picture as his wallpaper or framed in his room or some of her stuff at his place or their anniversary marked on a calendar and it reminded her that Yongguk left behind a legacy.

He left behind a trail of love, not only for her, but for the rest of his family. He made sure that they were happy and living their life like normal kids. He didn't want his past and decisions effecting the lives of the people he treasured the most.

Even to his last day he was looking out for the others.

"Yeah, I mean I'm starting to think of getting a girlfriend of my own just so I can stop seeing that stupid look on his face." Jongup said while pulling out a few dog treats he kept hidden in a drawer and tossed them to Watson.

Eun Ah's lips curved up in a smirk and started poking Junhong obnoxiously in the arm, "Ooooh, Junhong and Yoora sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G."

"Eun Ah, stop please you're so embarrassing." Junhong said while trying to swat her fingers away.

"First comes love,  then comes marriage, then come a baby in a carriage." Eun Ah's face grew seriously as she placed a hand on his shoulder.

"But seriously, use a rubber until you get married. I can't handle a giant baby having a smaller baby."

"Oh my God. Stop, I beg you." Junhong turned and walked away, ending the awkward conversation.

"Do you buy her flowers? Recite poetry? Serenade her?" Eun Ah asked with a snicker.

Jongup joined in on the hazing without missing a beat