Damaged people damage people.

26^th December 2014

Sehun spinned his phone in his hand as he slumped down the couch of the concert’s backstage. Occasionally he would unlock his phone to check for incoming messages but most of the time there wasn’t any. He stretched himself lazily, wondering what was Jieun doing that she didn’t reply him. His long hands accidentally hit onto Kai’s backpack, making it fall to the floor but he didn’t bother to pick it up.

Glaring at his backpack, a strange annoyance built up in his chest that he couldn’t bring himself to even touch it. It was all because of the owner of the backpack that his plans had gone down the drain. He had planned a lovely day out with Jieun but it was all ruined by none other than Kim Kai.

Another huge sigh escaped his lips when the scene of what happened a few days ago with G-dragon appeared before him. He didn’t even have to think much to guess their relationship and it scares him. Even though Jieun and him are not officially together, he was already afraid of someone new getting close to her, let alone her past lover.

With that, he purposely kicked the bag that was near his foot. If it wasn’t him, everything would be less complicated.

-

“Kai, stop moving pls.” His makeup artist frowned at him, he had been moving around so much that she couldn’t do her job properly.

“I’m sorry.” Kai apologised but there was nothing he could do. It was his natural instinct to shun away when her eyeliner pencil poked his eyes, and when she pressed the powder so harshly on his face. He had always been obedient when Jieun was around, he thought. The way she does it gently made him miss her a little more.

Since morning, he found it weird not being able to see those pair of eyes that would follow him wherever he goes. It felt even weirder to not have her following him everywhere. Everything just felt so strange that he really wished she didn’t have to be away from him. To think that he used to find it annoying, now he found himself wanting it.

“Done. You can go.” The girl announced and he stood up right away. As he passed by a group of staff, the game that they were playing caught his attention. He lingered around them for a while before opening his mouth.

“What game is this?”

“Huh?” A staff looked up, surprise to hear Kai talking to her. “Oh erm Disney Tsum Tsum.”

“Oh okay, thanks!”

“Jong..” Kyungsoo was about to reach out and stop the passing boy when he walked right passed him with an excited grin as he pressed on his phone. Raising his eyebrows weirdly, he couldn’t make sense of what had happened. He had never seen Jongin play games for years already, let alone asking about a game that was something he would not play. And that smile, it just shocked Kyungsoo to see it as he walked further away from him.

“Hello?” Kai leaned against the wall of the concert venue, kicking his foot back and forth like a teenager as he waited for the receipient on the other line to pick up the phone.

“Hello? Jongin?” Jieun’s voice was as gentle and he could hear her smile from behind the phone. The inner corner of his lips hooked up and he pressed the phone to his ear.

“What are you doing?”

“Me? I’m.. I’m in the office doing some paper work.”

“I see. Still doing?” Glancing at his watch, it was almost 11pm in Korea.“Is way passed your working hour already. Go home please.”

“Uhm, I will leave after I finish this.” Jieun replied softly, “You?”

“I’m waiting for the last stage.”

“Is your back okay?” Jieun asked worriedly. Kai could almost see her eyebrows furrowing at the end of the other line.

“Yupp.”

“Remember to take your medicine okay? Oh and remember to eat before taking the pain-killers.” Jieun reminded him, “And don’t drink it with cold water.”

Nodding his head instinctively, Kai forgot that Jieun couldn’t see him. If she could, she would smile too, for he was wearing a boyish grin throughout.

“Hello? Jongin? Are you there?”

“Yeah, I’m still here. I heard you. Don’t worry, I’m not hurting anywhere.” Kai comforted her. “Hurry go home okay? Take a taxi and text me when you are home.”

“Okay, keep yourself warm Jongin.”

“Uhm. You too.” Upon hanging up the phone, it then struck him that he was supposed to tell her about the game. He was quite sure she would like it and he was afraid she would be bored without them around. Nonetheless, the conversation made him feel so happy that he swiftly walked back to where his bag was. Picking it up from the ground, he put his phone back and headed to the stage before anyone else.

He was ready to embrace the stage.

-

“Sorry.” Jieun hung up the call and apologized to the man sitting opposite her. Guilt ate her conscious right away as she bit her lower lips, she didn’t mean to lie to Jongin. It felt like it was the right thing to do then.

Although the man before her was a total stranger, oddly, she doesn’t feel scared when he approached her outside her house. When he came out of his van, explaining that he was the friend of the guy who hugged her randomly that day, she felt strangely calm. He apologized on his behalf and asked her if they could talk. Before she knew it, she nodded her head, agreeing to it almost right away.

“No worries. I should be the one apologizing for making you lie.” Taeyang kept his eyes on her, still unable to believe the resemblence between the girl before him and Haewon. “Your boyfriend?”

Shaking her head, Jieun mumbled softly. “He’s my cousin.”

“You sound like you are talking to your boyfriend.” Taeyang gave a smile that never quite reach his eyes, reminiscing how Haewon would talk on her phone with Jiyong just like how she did earlier.

Haewon was almost like his younger sister. Whenever Jiyong and him hangs out, his best friend would always bring her along. If Jiyong and her are apart, he would send him to check on her constantly and he loves her like an older brother would. Every strand of the girl before him resembles Haewon completely. From her voice to her twinkling eyes, they were exactly the same. Now he understood why did Jiyong broke down completely when he saw her. Even he could not believe that she was not Haewon, let alone Jiyong.

However, as they converse, he could tell that they were somewhat different too. The girl before him doesn’t have the confidence that Haewon has. She has a tinge of shyness and wariness about everything. The exact opposite of Haewon.

“You look like my best friend’s ex-girlfriend..” Taeyang’s eyes were dazed and far away as he continued, “who quietly disappeared from his world, without a word, leaving only behind memories.”

Jieun’s eyes lifted her eyes to look at him upon hearing his words, waiting for him to continue.

“Since then Jiyong spent his whole life looking for her. But every result of the search was more depressing than the previous”

“I guess… of all hardships a person had to face, none was more punishing than the simple act of waiting.”

“We watched him drink his pain away a little at a time, but he never could get drunk enough to get her off his mind.”

If Taeyang could change things, he would. He couldn’t care less how he was going to sound ridiculous in the next moment because for his best friend, he was willing to do anything, and everything. “I know is ridiculous for me to ask you to do this.”

“But the truth, and reality is hurting him too much already…”

“Can you lie to him and tell him to move on?”

Biting her lower lips, scenes of Jiyong’s crying face came to her mind and her nose instinctively turned sour again. Now she knew the pain behind his tears and she felt sad for him. Slowly, she nodded her head, agreeing to Taeyang’s request almost immediately. “But.. I can only go tomorrow. I.. need to be home now.”

“Of course.” Taeyang broke into a smile, glad that she agreed. “I will message you his address and the passcode.”

Jieun nodded her head before giving him her number and hailed a cab outside the café and left, leaving Taeyang to watch her disappearing backview. He doesn’t know why but he trust Jieun; the girl who strangely felt so familiar.

But he also knows she wasn’t her. Haewon would never say things like she needed to be home. She will go to Jiyong no matter how late it was. Even her parents and her brother wouldn’t be able to stop her. Just like how she insisted on shifting in with Jiyong on the day she turned 21.

With that thought, he broke into a sad smile.

The truth and the reality really hurts.

So all they can do is to lie to everyone, even to themselves.

In hope that everything will be a little better.

Sorry for the lack of updates. I'm back from hiatus!

Though I'm having hols now I still have one more assignment to rush and I had been sick since last week.

Hope you will enjoy this update and hopefully you guys didn't forget about this story!