6 keys to a relationship: friendship, freedom, honesty, trust, understanding and communication.

19^th February 2009

Jiyong blew out a puff of smoke and he sunk back into the couch with his half-opened eyes, the club’s music was pounding against the bass, just like his head. Slowly reaching for another cup of drink, he stood up and staggered over to the balcony where he could oversee the dancefloor as he took in another puff from his cigarette. Tears blurred his vision suddenly and he leaned on the railing to cover his face right away.

He could hold himself together during the day, he could occupy himself with work or sleep to escape from the fact that Haewon and him broke up. But night was when he would start to unravel and his eyes would leak with his insides spill out and pool into his lap. He struggled to keep his head above the water and during the day it had always been too shallow to drown in but when night came, it would finally deep enough.

“GD Oppa, are you okay?” A girl whom he couldn’t recall her name helped him up and slung her arms around his neck. Her smile was enchanting him and her hands were seducing his body, and Jiyong laughed dryly. He was G-dragon, the most famous member of Big Bang, the gummy smile boy. There was no girls out there who didn’t know him. He could get any girls he want in the club tonight just by raising his hand because there were no girls out there who would not want him.

No, he was wrong. Haewon didn’t want him. She prefers the other guy who walked her home half a year ago.

Entangling himself from the girl’s claws, Jiyong staggered back to the couch and collapsed on it while his other friends continued making out with the other girls that they had attracted using his stage name.

“Kwon Jiyong!”

“You get up!”

Jiyong felt himself being lifted but he couldn’t be bothered to fight back, his world was spinning and hopefully it would spin till it collide with Haewon’s. He couldn’t explain why was she so special to him that cigarattes didn’t phase him, drugs didn’t scare him but he went an hour without her and he realized what addiction was like.

“Kwon Jiyong!!” Kiwon grabbed his collar and sat the boy up. When Taeyang told him that Jiyong went clubbing with Nu-thang, he was beyond mad because he knew that group of friends was nothing but bad influence. And just like he had expected, Jiyong was definitely not drunk or high, he was zoned out.

Grabbing the cigarattes from Jiyong, Kiwon smelt it and he threw it to the ground right away, ceasing it angrily with his foot. He understood that there are all kinds of addicts because all of them have pain and they will look for ways to make the pain go away. But he wouldn’t let his best friend be a drug-addict just because of a broken relationship with his sister.

“Are you crazy?!” He hissed at him, “You are touching again! I told you to stay away from it right?”

“I’m the one… that’s got to die when it’s time for me to die… so let me live my life the way I want to.” Jiyong pushed Kiwon away as he reached for another stick on the table but was swept away by the latter.

“Come with me!” Kiwon pulled Jiyong off the couch as he carried him out of the club, shoving his Nu-thang friends out of his way when they attempted to stop him. Throwing him into the van, he sped down the streets of Seoul as Jiyong fell into slumber.

Looking at him, he sighed. Jiyong did drugs while Haewon kept going for a run everyday for the past 6 months. At the very end, they were both just searching for that tiny space, perhaps a hole, that could give them shelter from the terrible reality that they had broken up. He couldn’t understand why none of them wanted to make the first step when they both clearly still love each other so much.

“Won. Open the door.” Kiwon knocked on Haewon’s door softly, afraid to wake his parents up. However, there were no movements from inside. Turning the doorknob, he opened it by himself to see his sister sitting in the dark in front of the computer screen. Till he approached her while dragging Jiyong with him, Haewon turned and that was when he realized that she had been crying, while watching Jiyong’s fancam.

“Oh.. my god…” Haewon covered when she saw who was slumped on her brother. “Ji.. Jiyong…”

“What… what happened Oppa?”

Putting Jiyong on Haewon’s bed gently, the girl went up to him right away, placing her hand over his dishevelled face. She couldn’t care less how his facial hair was poking her hand because she really missed his stupid face.

“He took Won.” Kiwon rubbed his face, “And its not the first time.”

“How.. come?” Haewon asked with tears stinging her eyes.

“He couldn’t handle the fame and he missed you.”

Haewon stared hard at the boy who was sleeping beside her as she wiped her tears that escaped her eyes. He could be lying next to her sleeping in absolute silence, and it would still be more beautiful than any other sound she had ever heard for the past 6 months since they had broken up.

“I will look after him. Oppa, you go and rest.”

“Won….”

“Haewon….”

“I am.. sorry.. I.. really love you..”

“Won…” Jiyong cried in his sleep before opening his teary eyes slowly, staring hard at the girl before him as he wondered if the had caused him to hallucinate again. Almost automatically, he choked out. “I’m sorry…”

“Don’t bother apologizing if you’re just going to continue doing the things you said sorry for!!” Haewon cried as she shook with anger. She couldn’t believe what her brother had told her; Jiyong taking drugs. He worked so hard for this career yet he was throwing it away again. She tried to stay calm. Being mad at him was nothing new but it didn’t get easier. It was hard to deal with a guy she both love and hate for his bad habits. “You think you’re so ing mature just because you are older than me so you can take drugs in an attempt to get over our broken relationship?!”

“You don’t care about your career or your health and you go out and party every night.”

“I’m younger than you and I have my priorities figured out more than you do so don’t you dare tell me who I shouldn’t talk to or what I do is immature when what you’re doing now is worst than a two year old!!”

However, as Haewon breathed hardly and glared at the boy angrily, he just laid there and stared at her gently, not taking his eyes off her or even blinked, making her panic as she avoided his instense stare.

“W..what?” Haewon asked nervously.

“Nothing.” Jiyong said quietly.

“Why.. why are you looking at me like that?”

Jiyong half smiled, “Because you’re beautiful.”

Haewon was sure that there was something about those words he used, those names he called her with earlier and those phrases that elicit a response because as much as she didn’t want to, she responded. In fact, her body had betrayed her by breaking into a smile uncontrollably.

“You’re drunk.” Haewon turned around to get away from him right away but was pulled back as she landed right into his embrace.

Leaning his head on her shoulder, Jiyong closed his eyes and inhaled her familiar scent. That moment, he was sure she was an addiction that he didn’t want to escape; never in his life. “Yes, I’m drunk and you’re beautiful. And tomorrow morning, I will be sober and you’ll still be beautiful.”

Haewon blushed as she leaned herself in his embrace and closed her eyes. He smelt like smoke and alcohol. Although they are both poison, she was once again intoxicated by him. 6 months without him, she realized that she didn’t need labels in her relationships, all she needed was his consistency. All she needed to know was that they would not wake up in the morning and feel differently about each other. Everything else didn’t matter to her anymore.

Closing his eyes, Jiyong inched closer to her and pressed his lips lightly on hers. Kissing her wasn’t fireworks, he didn’t feel the stars align or a fairytale ending. When he kissed her, it felt like coming home, and it felt like jumping into a pool on a hot summer day and it also felt like coming up for air. It felt like the pieces of him just fell into place when he kissed her and he tasted forever on every corner of her lips.

“When I’m with you, I feel so safe.” Jiyong breathed out. Laying there with her arms around him, he felt so comfortable and safe. His heart was beating a mile a minute having her so close to him. As she played with his hair and kissed him again, he couldn’t help but to smile straight from his heart. “Like I’m home.”

He could see how much she cared from the look in her eyes and it made him never want to let her go. He just want to stay wrapped in her arms forever, where nothing else matters but just them.

However, it was impossible.

Because right when the day broke and while they were still enjoying the warmth in each other’s arms, Kiwon came barging into the room with the news he was most afraid of. Pictures of Big Bang’s G-dragon smoking what seems like were splashed all over internet.

“The police wants Jiyong to perform a urine test now.” He broke the news to the couple and instantly, Haewon’s heart was gripped in fear as she held Jiyong’s hand tightly, unwilling to let him go.

“I.. I don’t want to go… Hyung.. please.. I can’t go..” Jiyong shook his head and begged as fear started to enshroud him, “I… it will be.. a positive… I can’t…”

“Please help Jiyong Oppa… Please…” Haewon plead her brother as she cried out.

“It’s either I hand you in or they come to get you Jiyong.” Kiwon choked out. It was an order from the CEO Yang. The company didn’t want him to cause anymore more troubles that might hinder them from saving him. “I’m sorry I have to do this Jiyong..”

“I don’t want them to handcuff you.”

“I promise you I will do whatever I can to get you out.”

“I.. can’t.. hyung… I will lose everything.. I don’t want.. I want to sing…I still want to stand on stage..” Jiyong cried helplessly, he regretted touching now. He wants to continue singing and give Haewon a good life like he had promised her.

“Ji…” Haewon turned to her boyfriend and hugged him tightly. As much as she didn’t want to hand him over, she knew it would be better for him to turn himself in than to have them come chasing after him. Deep in her heart, she knew the toughest choice was the best. “Go with Oppa. Trust him.”

Breaking away from the hug, Jiyong looked at the girl before him with helplessness covering his eyes. “It will be a positive Won…”

“I don’t want to go…”

“They.. will take everything away from me…”

“And.. what if… I lose everything I have?” He didn’t want to lose his career, his dream and most importantly her.

Cupping his cheeks, Haewon his cheeks gently. She forced out a smile for him before leaning her forehead on his, with a firm voice she reassured him.

“You’ll still have me.”

And that moment, Jiyong finally realize that a relationship is not about finding someone who wouldn’t fight with him or make him sad. It was about finding the person who would still be standing there wiping his tears away, holding him in their arms after a fight and the one who would never leave, no matter how hard things would get.

And it was the 17-year old Haewon for the 21 year old Jiyong.

Well, I had been on Aff for almost 3 years. It wasn't till recently that I started writing fics so enthusiastically. I always believed that there is no line between my readers and me so I will try to reply comments whenever possible, and I always accept all of your feedback with an open heart. I answer my readers' questions nicely and I always thank you guys because without all of you, my stories wouldn't be featured. However, something happened yesterday that I felt really mad, I don't even know what to say about it. 

I know my tenses is bad and I'm trying to fix that problem. My readers should know because I had been saying that since MDIAS. But I totally do not agree that my storyline is slow. I don't understand the reason behind her creating an account on 5th Jan 2015 just to leave me a comment like that? And given that it is a new account, I've got absolutely no idea how did she know the existence of Stranger's Love when it is not featured? Furthermore, I'm not a really popular author how did she even get to know about me? Weird right??

What I'm annoyed about is that, she could have used a much nicer tone. Her tone was.... rude and arrogant to me. It makes me feel like she is out to crush me instead of helping me.

Uurgh.