Quick Note:

Italics in this story is L's voice. I kind have it where Myungsoo has two different voices in his head. His own and the one the company has forced on him. Well enjoy!!

Bright lights’ blinded my sight was like a sweet lullaby.

When was the last time I slept?

Why couldn’t I remember?

Ah yes I tried to sleep a couple hours ago but all I did was stare at the ceiling.

Myungsoo don’t think about sleep not when you’re with them.

They’re like a pack of wild dogs once they see weakness they’ll attack. Being clawed to death by good looking boys was the last way I wanted to go.

I rather die by choking on ice cream because we all know that would happen to me.

I was far too lost in my head to notice that I had forgotten to smile which was too bad because the other boys had noticed the change in the atmosphere.

The boy next to me was named Shiwoo, the leader of a new rookie band called Dream. He leaned closely letting his arm rest next to my side. He grabbed ahold of my waist and pinched it harshly. I bit my lip as I forced another smile.

The photographers went wild taking even more photos as the fan girls screamed in excitement.

When was this going to end?

I had already told Dohyun I was sorry but I still had to work with his band.

Dream wasn’t a bad group after all I liked their music well that was before I met them. As rookies you must uphold good manners to those around you.

You must always be grateful since fame, money, and your title can be ripped away within seconds.

Dream was a five member group and most of them were selfish and could careless about music. Shiwoo had admitted to sleeping with girl groups more than once. He has even caused fights between members which led to break ups. Jake the only English speaking member was clueless that his bandmates made fun of him. I heard stories about how they left Jake in Hongdae and it took him four hours to find his way back to the dorms. Joowoo was more into the acting than music and everyone in the industry knew that. He only made the group because of his looks although I can’t say much since I was chosen because of my looks but we were completely different. Next is the member I almost dislike as much as I do for Dohyun. His name is Yejun and he’s a bully. Since his mother is a stock holder in a couple of Korean music shows he’s untouched. No one wants the producers to be mad at them so no one says a word.  Yejun uses his power to pick on the weak like how he picked on Sungjong.

Anger filled my veins as I thought about the times Sungjong came home with bruises on his body or wearing wet clothes.

A woman who was wearing way too much makeup and a brightly colored dressed waved us on. I bowed once again before I followed the other members into the event.

It was an art show no it was for a new clothing line being launched.

Each event seemed to fade together making it hard to remember what I was smiling for.

We enter a large ballroom where loud house music was playing as servers in black walked around with trays of wine. On the other side of the room was a table full of food that was left untouched.

This after all was a fashion event.

My stomach growled as I took a step forward but an arm stopped me.

I looked back to see Yejun grabbing a hold of my arm with what I can only describe as a look of pure evil.

I raised a questionable look but Yejun led me away from the music followed by the rest of s.

This wasn’t good.

“What’s going on?” I asked hoping that my fear wasn’t showing.

They stayed quiet which made the whole situation worst.

“Let’s go back to the party. I’m sure the managers are wondering where we are,” I told them but that didn’t stop them.

I could’ve smacked myself for begging Hyowan to let me go by myself.

Lately he had been such a nag telling me to rest or eat.

I didn’t need another mother after all my own was relaxing thinking that I was taking it easy.

She didn’t need to know things that would hurt her.

“Where are we going? You know people will notice I’m missing,” I told them my voice shaking.

Shiwoo open a random door then Yejun without warning pushed me into the room. My knees clashed against the coldness of the floor as my hands stopped my face from doing a faceplate.

I looked up just in time to see the other members shutting the door.

The first thing I noticed was the room was hot like a sauna.

Where was I?

I looked around; it seemed to be some type of electrical room. I was laying on a grey cement floor and next to me were brooms, mops, and other cleaning supplies.  Grey lock boxes littered the walls and next to them were metal pipes that filled the room like a puzzle.

I sat up to see the five boys were now glaring at me.

“What’s going on? Why am I here?”

I hated to admit it but I was now scared.

“Isn’t it obvious?”  Dohyun scoffed.

“Payback,” I mumbled to myself.

“Do you know how long it takes to cover this up,” Dohyun pointed to his eye. You could still slightly see a light grey mark but most of it was covered up by make-up.

“What do you want?” I sputtered out.

“Apologize,” Yejun told me pointing to Dohyun.

I laughed insanely.

“Are you kidding me?” I asked them. “Never.”

I’ll never say sorry.

“We’ll get it out of you,” Shiwoo informed me with a smirk.

Suddenly Jake started to speak something in English. I couldn’t even understand what he was saying and I’m sure s didn’t either.

Jake pushed passed Shiwoo and left the room.

“We don’t need him,” Shiwoo pointed out crossing his arms.

“I’m not sure about this,” Joowoo unsurely said.

“Don’t tell me you’re backing out too,” Yejun said crossing his arms.

“I’m not it’s just what if we get into trouble over this?” Joowoo asked looking around the room as if the police were going to rush in at any moment.

“We won’t,” Dohyun told him.

“What if his fans find out?” Joowoo looked unsure.

“Listen you can leave if you want but who’s going to believe him? Since his band member died he’s gone crazy. Even his fans are starting to notice something is up with him-“

Dohyun didn’t finish his sentence because I had run straight into him sending us both to the ground.

Dohyun let out a grunt as he tried to push himself off of me. Any other time he would have been able to but right now I was so jacked on adrenaline that I could even pick up a car if I needed to.

I raised my fist and was about to give him a matching black eye when someone screamed.

“Get him!”

I felt arms dragging me away from Dohyun.

I let out a shout wanting to get back to my prey.

I wanted to kill him now more than ever. I wanted him to regret all the words he had ever said to me or to Sungjong. I wanted him to pay!

“Don’t let him go,” Yejun instructed.

I look up to see that Joowoo and Shiwoo were now holding my arms tightly.

“Let me go,” I grunted.

“Apologize,” Dohyun said standing up.

“Never,” I objected.

“Fine,” Dohyun grabbed a broom. “Turn him around.”

“You’re not going to...” Joowoo looked at the broom then back to me.

“I said turn him around!” Dohyun yelled.

Joowoo nodded and helped Shiwoo turn me around.

“Here Yejun you’ve always been the best at this,” Dohyun said behind my back.

 I let out a loud scream as the broom hit harshly against my lower back.

“Get something to cover his mouth,” Yejun shouted.

Suddenly something came into my view I could tell that it was bright red cloth before it was shoved into my mouth. I let out a gag as my mouth fully tasted the rag. It tasted like dirt and something sour.

I didn’t have time to think about it anymore when the broom smacked harshly against my waist again.

“Say sorry,” Shiwoo said.

I shook my head no.

“Well get it out,” Yejun told no one in particular.

I thought what I experience earlier was painful but the smacks were getting even harder. Tears that I promised not to shred were now rolling down my face.  I was sure that each smack was leaving a large mark that would last for a few days or week.

I didn’t know how long I spent in that room but by now my tee shirt was wet with a combination of sweat and tears.

My whole body felt sickly numb as if I wasn’t really there being beaten with a broom.   

“Hyung he’s bleeding,” someone called from next to me.

I was too tired to even see who it was that spoke up for me.

“Who cares?” Dohyun answered simply.

SMACK.

My legs gave out underneath me and Joowoo and Shiwoo had to grab ahold of my shoulders tightly to stop me from falling to the ground.

 “I think he had enough,” another voice said.

“I’m not done yet,” Dohyun said stubbornly.

Another loud hit my waist once again but it felt all the same.

“Look what we have here,” a new voice said.

Who was there?

Suddenly without warning the two arms holding me up let go and I toppled to the ground.

I was lying face down on the ground too weak to even care if I looked like a fool.

“What are you doing here Kibum?” Dohyun snarled.

“I was enjoying a party but then this awful noise disrupted my good time,” Kibum sighed.

“Sorry Sunbae we’ll keep it down,” Joowoo interjected.

“Ah,” Kibum sighed. “But you see it’s more exciting in here!”

Dohyun took a step back shocked. “What?”

“You see I even videotaped it,” Kibum held up his phone.

“Get his phone!” Dohyun yelled.

Kibum laughed. “Do you really think I’m that stupid? I’ve already sent it to my other phone. You know just in case something happens to my phone.”

“What do you want Kibum?” Shiwoo asked.

“Leave and if I catch you anywhere near him, I’ll send this video to each news channel,” Kibum threaten him.

“Kibum don’t act all high and mighty we’ve heard rumors about Shinee and you,” Yejun snorted.

“Your right there is many rumors about my group but those are just rumors and this is fact,” Kibum stated. “You’re a rookie group and although you have money to buy talent you can’t buy friendship or support. If word gets out that you were caught beating up an Infinite member you’ll be thrown into hell. No one I mean no one will want you.”

Shinwoo was silence for what felt like for hours then the suddenly Joowoo spoke up.

“I didn’t train for years to get kicked out because of this. I’m out of here and if you guys don’t want to join then you’re just plain dumb.”

“Whatever,” Dohyun said.

“Let’s just go,” Shinwoo added.

I heard the shuffling of feet than suddenly the whole room went silent.

“Are you okay Myungsoo,” Kibum asked his voice shaking.

I nodded my head as Kibum grabbed my arms and helped push me into a seating position.

“What did you do?” he asked me. His face scanned my beaten up body which made me fell even more self-conscious.

“I punched Dohyun in the face,” I answered simply.

“How bad is it,” Kibum leaned over and lifted up my shirt. He let out a gasp as he looked at my battle wounds from the broom.

“I’m fine,” I reached behind and yanked my shirt down.

“Listen you need to tell someone about this,” Kibum told me. “Your managers could make sure you’re far away from Dream.”

“I’m fine,” I told him.

“No you’re not,” Kibum pointed out. “Myungsoo you were just beaten like a doll.”

“Kibum I don’t need your help,” I tried to stand up but my legs gave out and I fell into Kibum’s chest.

“Ah you don’t need help,” Kibum scoffed.

“I’ll be fine,” I told him as I pushed away from Kibum.

Kibum sighed. “You don’t even look like you can walk.”

“Just give me a second to breath,” I replied although breathing was the last thing I needed. Instead I need a very large ice pack or heating pad. I couldn’t decide which one was needed more.

“Myungsoo I know we haven’t been close before but I’m worry about you. I can tell how tired you are and now you’re getting into fight with other idol groups. I’m not trying to stick my nose where it doesn’t belong bu-“

“But you are,” I spitted out.

“Maybe it would help if you talked to one of your bandmates maybe Woohyun. I know some of the older boys used to pick on him. He could talk to you about his-“

“I don’t need my bandmates!” I snapped making Kibum frown.

“I guess you didn’t need me to stop Dohyun from cutting you in half,” he snarled.

I bit the corner of my lip. “Thank you for helping me this one time but I don’t need your help anymore.”

Kibum scoffed. “You can’t always do things on your own. You weren’t brought up that way either.”

I bit the corner of my lip and used all my strength to stand up on my feet. I swayed for a second but I was finally able to find my balance.

“I changed,” I said between gritted teeth. “Now I don’t know what you’re doing but I’m late for a fashion show.”

I slowly limped out of the room trying to hold in the tears.

Because it hurt.

It really did hurt.

I was embarrassed my hyung’s friend had to save me like a little kid.

I don’t want to be a kid anymore.

L isn’t a kid.

I didn’t make it back to the show instead I took a detour to the loading dock, where I called for a cab.

It was unbearable pain with every step I took.  

When I made it back to the hotel room I was glad that none of the managers were there to see what state I was in.

The room was way too cold like someone had forgotten to turn off the air conditioner. I sat down on the tightly made bed that contained itchy sheets. I carefully tore off my long sleeve button up shirt. I almost cried in disgust when I saw smudges of blood that littered the back of my shirt. I bit the corner of my lip and turned my head around so I could see my reflection in the mirror. A pale boy stared back at me with watery eyes. My clear pale skin was littered with dark blue and green welts. I had three large cuts that were still bleeding.  I picked up a towel next to me and started to carefully wrap it around my stomach.

I let out a grunt and clenched my teeth together as the soft towel hit my wounds.

Are you going to stand for this?

L not right now.

Look what they did to our body! Our beautiful body is now ruined.

Not our body it’s my body.

You should have fought back!

Yes because fighting against four teenage boys seems like a fair fight.

Next time it’ll be even just wait!

What do you mean next time?

Do you really think I would stand back and watch you act like a baby? No we’re going to get our revenge.

I don’t think that’s a good idea.

Well good for you all you have to do is stay pretty and leave the thinking to me.

But-

No buts Dream is going to pay so bad that they won’t even be able to show their faces on radio.

This doesn’t sound like a good idea.

Flying to the moon in a mental container was a stupid idea and look where that got the Americans. Now shut up and let me do the planning.

The overly crowded room was full of half- men who were being attacked by stylists.

I didn’t want to be here but my fans needed me.

My whole body ach even my finger nails. Even sleeping with an ice pack at night didn’t help my bruises. When Hyowan found me the next morning he just assumed I had drink too much the night before.

I hadn’t plan on lying to him but the thoughts of him knowing that I was beaten up was too embarrassing.

I needed Hyowan to drive not give lectures every two seconds; after all I had Sunggyu for that.

“How are you doing kid?” Hyowan asked handing me a paper cup full of coffee.

“Fine,” I forced a smile before I took a sip of the coffee. It tasted bitter and I tried my hardest not to spit it back into the cup.

It was the type of coffee Sungyeol loves the black and almost unfiltered. Hyowan always got our coffee orders messed up and we would usually switch them when he had his back turned.

“L we need you prepped and ready to go,” a man wearing all black with a matching headset said.

I nodded my head and handed the coffee to Hyowan and slowly stood up but as I did I made a mistake because Hyowan gasp and grabbed my shirt.

I blame the weird new fashion design I was wearing. The tee shirt was longer in the front but yet shorter in the back.  I had begged with fashion director to let me wear a sleeveless shirt and after twenty minutes of arguing he finally agreed. It was my mistake because I had forgotten to pull down the extra tee shirt before I stood up again.

  My eyes grew wide and I hastily pulled down the sleeveless shirt. I turned around to see that Hyowan eyes were wide open as he started at me up and down.

“What happen?” he asked grabbing ahold of my hips to turn me back around.

“Nothing,” I said between closed teeth. I pushed his hands away and turned back around to look at him.

“Nothing.” I said once again.

“Myungsoo this doesn’t look like nothing!” Hyowan yelled making a couple models turn their attention to our location.

“It doesn’t hurt as bad as it looks,” I lied trying to keep my voice down.

“Don’t lie to me now tell me who did this to you,” Hyowan ordered.

“It’s nothing I mean it happen so fast that I didn’t have a chance to see their faces,” I lied once again as I looked around the small room to make sure our conversation was still private.

Hyowan bit his lip, “It was Dream right?” he whispered.

I shook my head quickly.

“I’m going to kill them,” he slammed his fist against his leg.

“Please Hyowan if you say something it’ll just make it worst,” I pleaded.

“I don’t care. Now gather your stuff we’re going home,” he told me standing up.

“But I have a fashion show,” I pointed to the man who was now waving me on.

“Like hell you do,” Hyowan scoffed. “Now stay here and let me figure something out.”

“Really?” I sighed as Hyowan stood up.

“Myungsoo if I catch you even two inches out of this seat the company will ground you,” Hyowan threaten me.

“But you can’t do that!”

“Like hell we can’t. Now stay still!” Hyowan order me as he pushed past models and stylists.

I bit the corner of my lip trying to stop my pounding heart.

What was I going to do?

Don’t let him ruin your plans.

Shut up L.

If he gets Dream into trouble we can’t have our fun.

You still haven’t told me the plan yet.

Well it involves-

“Are you coming or not,” the stylist rudely asked.

“I uh…” I looked over to Hyowan who was having a serious conversation with one of the head managers.

Do it.

But he told me not to leave this seat.

Do we listen to anyone?

But-             

But nothing! We’ll be giving up on our fans! Do you want to disappoint them?

Well no…

Then get your tiny up.

One more show then we really need to rest.

Fine.

I stood up and smiled apologetically to the man who was about to push me off of a cliff.

“Sorry,” I mumbled to him.

“Whatever let’s go before it’s too late,” he snapped at me.

I followed the man down a darkly lit hallway that contained pictures of fashion models wearing weird clothing. I could hear loud house music being played which made me even more nervous.

My whole body ache with each step I took, I didn’t want to be there but I couldn’t disappoint my fans. I promise them I would perform.

The backstage was even crazier than the dressing room. There were models waiting their turn as stylists played with their hair or clothes.

The man led me to the entrance of the stage. I could see lights flashing which made my heart speed up even more.

I’ve done this millions of times but this time my whole body was shaking from nervousness.

A young man wearing brightly color clothing step forward and grabbed my hand.

“Look at this mess,” he sighed as he pulled out a comb from somewhere unseen and started to comb my hair. “Such a mess. Why are you so sweaty too!”

The dull lights around me felt as if I was in a dream.

“You’re not nervous are you?” the man asked me.

I nodded my head nonchalant.

“I swear I always get the rookies. While Jihyo always gets the best models! It’s not fair,” the man grumbled as he fixed my hair.

“We need him next,” a woman pointed at me.

“Don’t mess this up kid,” the man told me as he walked off to grab his next victim.

I followed the woman who was too busy talking on her headphone to notice me.

My hands couldn’t stop shaking and I suddenly felt the urge to go climb into a hole.

Was it too late to go back to Hyowan?

A handsome male walked off the stage right to another stylist.

“Go!” the women yelled in my ear.

It was too late.

I forced my shaky legs to step forward toward the bright light.

Get it together Myungsoo!

I clench my teeth together and gave the best blank face I could give.

After all I would let my face do the talking.

I took a step out and was instantly blinded by bright lights.

I took another step then another step.

I could hear fans screaming which just made me want to give it my all. I struck a pose then turned my body and started to walk back down the catwalk to the curtains.

I couldn’t help but crack a smile at my accomplishments.

I must have been crazy because my legs stopped walking.

What are you doing Myungsoo?

I grabbed a hold of my head and let out a moan.  The word was spinning around as the lights around me flashed brighter than ever.

Ring-a-round the rosie, a pocket full of posies.

Oh god.

Ashes! Ashes!

My legs collapse and I fell into a pit of darkness.

We all fall down.

Author Notes:

Dream is a fictional group and not based on any Kpop group. I didn't want to use a real group because honestly each group works hard and it's unfair of me to write them in a bad light. Plus I once read a story where Dongwoo was the villain it actually made me kind of mad. So instead of writing a hard working group as the villain I decided to make one up. Also thank you guys for reading. I know updating has been slow but I'm really trying to go faster. Thank you for reading!

-Morgan