You’re the last one to be in Sunggyu’s room. As you sit beside him, you slowly hold his hands tightly. “Oppa, are you okay?” You asked. “I’m fine better than ever.” He smiled. You sighed, he’s still the playful oppa you’ve always known. “I’m sorry.” He said. “What for? You did nothing wrong.” “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier. I planned to tell you the truth but I’m so afraid. I’m afraid that you might not be the cheerful dongsaeng that I love the most. I’m afraid that you might leave your happiness for me.” He said slowly. Tears began flowing down your cheeks. “It’s okay, oppa. I understand. I’m not even mad at you. I’ll never be mad at you. It’s my entire fault for didn’t realized it earlier. I mean, I accompanied you to the hospital back then, but I still didn’t realize anything. Don’t say that such things. You are my happiness.”

“You know that day when you accompanied me to the hospital? I went to see the doctor and he told me that my lungs cancer is in the critical phase. He advised me to stay at the hospital but I refused. I can’t leave you yet. I’m not ready to leave you yet.” You cried harder, “You should’ve stayed at the hospital. You could’ve been better, okay.” He shakes his head and said, “No, I can’t get better. My cancer is already in the critical phase. You know there’s no cure for cancer. There’s nothing left for me to do except for counting down the days that I’ll die.” “Oppa, don’t say that. You’ll get better. You will. You can’t leave me alone. What should I do without you?” Sunggyu your hand and said, “You have Myungsoo with you. He can protect you for me.”

“But having you and having Myungsoo are different okay. My feelings towards you and towards Myungsoo are different. You two are not the same person.” You said. “I know. Having Myungsoo is like having someone who you can give all your love to. Who you can run to every time you’re sad. Having me is like having an older brother. Who you can tell all your problems to. Who you can depend on in your life. I’ll never be that special person in your heart, right? I must be a crazy person thinking that one day I might be your special guy.” He said in a low voice. “It’s not like that. You’ve been part of me since the beginning okay. You’re always there through my ups and downs. What you didn’t know is that you are the special one in my heart. You are….” “Yeah, surely I’m that special one in your heart but you just love me as your oppa. Not more than that.”

“I don’t understand.” “You’ll never understand. Every day I'm praying that your heart will just turn around. That you’ll somehow notice me here. Waiting, waiting and waiting. It seems like I’m waiting forever for that. I wondered to myself what does Myungsoo have that I don’t have. Am I really that pathetic by thinking like that? I wondered why you can’t look at me like the way you looked at Myungsoo. There’s a difference okay. The way you look at him and the way you look at me. I can see it. He looks at you, the way that I would. Does all the things, I know that I could. If only time could just turn back. Because I got three little words that I've always been dying to tell you.” He said. “You don’t say?” He cut you off by saying “Honestly to tell you, I love you. I love you more than just an oppa. I love you with all of my heart since the first time we met. I can’t have you but I want you”