New York

Jieun woke up with a start, feeling the sweat on her forehead. It’s the second time in a row that she’s dreamt of that time with Jihoon in Guam and it drives her crazy. The dream is always so vivid that she can almost feel how warm his hands were around her waist…. and those lips.

Those lips on hers. And all over her.

She shook her head and  held those thoughts to a screeching halt lest she goes completely berserk.

It’s not helping.

Going away and finding the time to think things through without him close was indeed a wise decision. She loses her bearings whenever he draws near and it’s not healthy, especially when he’s not technically a “single” man.

She was good up until that point when he helped her “remember” - that was her undoing.

It was then that fragments of that night started to slowly build inside her head. The heavy drinking, drunk dialling, and the memory of kissing someone – it all fit what Jihoon was telling her. But she wanted to deny it. Everytime her brain gives her more information about that night, it makes her cringe from embarrassment. Not sure if it’s from throwing herself at Jihoon like a woman possessed or from spilling all her feelings out like a woman without a pinch of pride left.

But then she would think about Jihoon and those eyes – how his voice sounded so disappointed when she didn’t seem to believe all of the things he was telling her – it told her a lot about how he felt.

“Aghh!” She screamed in frustration, kicking the sheets away from her.

It felt like her brain was getting overworked from thinking too much about Jihoon and what she’s going to do about it.

She glanced at the clock on the bedside table which told her it’s 8 am. Way too early in Jieun’s world. She’s usually not up this early and it just shows how bad her sleep is lately.

There’s only one person who can help her deal with this – Inna.

It’s 10pm in Seoul and she’s pretty sure Inna is still up. It didn’t even take a 2nd ring for her friend to pick-up.

“Jieun-ah! Isn’t it way too early there? Am I witnessing a miracle?”

Jieun smirked at her friends humor.

“I couldn’t sleep well. And there’s something urgent I need to talk to you about.”

“Oooooh, curiouser and curiouser. Tell me more.”

“I don’t even know where to start, Inna.” She said with a sigh.

“Please, you look like you’re having the time of your life. By the way, is this about Junghoon? Are we finally moving on from the caveman? Haha!”

Inna was having the time of her life teasing her.

“Yes and no…and this is more about Jihoon oppa.”

She can hear a low “ohhhh” from Inna.

“Wait…let me guess. You ran away from Jihoon oppa didn’t you? I knew it! I found it suspiscious that you left everyone and flew on your own. Spill it, Jieun.”

“I had to fly ahead because Junghoon asked me to guest on his shows…”

Inna then blurted out that she’s turning on video. Jieun knew she’s trying to get to the bottom of this and she’s smelling bull.

Reluctantly pressing the ‘accept” button on her screen, Jieun prepared herself for the onslaught of questions. Jieun had no choice but to tell the truth although “the truth” is still pretty foggy to her. When she finally finished telling Inna everything, there was silence, which Jieun did not expect.

“Yah, are you sleeping?”

All she heard was a loud sigh.

“Inna?”

“Wah…Jieun-ah..I can’t believe you just made out with Jihoon oppa.”

Jieun found it almost funny because her friend’s words were slow and almost unintelligible.

“Is that all you can tell me?? I told you about him and Taehee unnie, but your brain focused on that small part of my story? Really??”

“Are you kidding me?? Where else should I focus?? I just can’t believe it! And honestly I’m so happy for you because it means he has feelings for you and we don’t have to guess anymore. Aren’t you glad about that?”

“The thing is, it bothers me that he can’t say no Taehee unnie…where is my friend who always tells me to be careful? Please tell her to come out!”

“Mianhe…I was just overwhelmed. But really, Jieun, think about it. Him actually telling you this is a big risk, since this thing with Taehee unnie is contract related. It means he trusts you and values you enough to take that jump. I think you’re also being a little hasty when you say there’s something else going on between them.”

Inna’s words made sense to her. But the thing that really eats her up is the idea of sharing Jihoon with someone else, even if it was just for show. She’s not sure if her heart can take it. It’s selfish…but it is what it is.

After a series of persistent but unsuccessful protests for her to give more juicy details of her special moments with Jihoon, Inna hung up, to Jieun’s relief. Not only because she’d rather keep the details to herself, but because reliving them, even in her memory makes her want to just run to Jihoon without a care in the world.

**

Jihoon wants to make himself believe that it’s the jet lag that’s gotten him into this funky mood, but he’ll be lying if that’s the case. Changmo has been eyeing him for a while now, and even that is getting on his nerves.

“Hyung, just ask me. I can’t read minds.”

Changmo cleared his throat before speaking tentatively.

“Are you alright?”

He clearly isn’t. So instead of voicing it out and giving his emotions more power over him, he just glared at his manager and refreshed his instagram feed. When he caught himself doing that for the nth time, he cursed inwardly.

This can’t be how it ends after that night. It can’t be. He didn’t imagine all of that – how Jieun reacted to him.

Yet for two days all he’s seen are photos of her and Junghoon and his friends. Or fancams. Or articles from blogs, media sites..it’s everywhere and it’s making his head hurt.

Sensing his foul mood, Changmo changed the topic and told him that he has no other commitments for the next two days. Interviews, and a short fanmeet will happen on the day of the concert. Then they fly to Los Angeles for their second and last stop in the US before the European leg starts.

He didn’t even care about what Changmo was saying, because he’s itching to get to t