PLAYLIST: “All I Got,” Baekhyun

DOHEE

Oh god, why didn’t I think of this? WHY? It’s common sense, right? It’s an island for Pete’s sake, what did I expect? Have the train dive into the water to take us straight there? But still, that never crossed my mind at all. I was too invested in other things in my head. I am freaking out. When we arrived at Gapyeong Station, that was only when Baekhyun mentioned riding a ferry as our last step to get to the island. He gave such information away so casually like I am supposed to know about it already. Maybe … I was supposed to know? Am I that stupid?

We are now in a cab on our way to our hotel first to drop off some of our stuff before we get to the ferry and start our day. I have not moved an inch on my seat since we got in. I was able to hide my panic when he told me about the ferry. I didn’t want him to know that I wasn’t mentally prepared for that. It’s so stupid of me to never think about that part of the trip. He said it only takes about five minutes of ferry ride maybe that’s why he never thought to mention it to me but still—I know how to swim only when it’s shallow enough for me to keep my head above water, what if it’s too deep and  I drown? What if the ferry sinks because we hit an iceberg? WAIT—it’s the end of August and this is South Korea, what is wrong with my brain? But it doesn’t matter, what if it hits a big rock or something? What am I going to do?

Am I going to die a ?

Oh my god, I can’t be a ghost too. That’s going to be too sad.

What if they write on my tombstone ‘Her life may not have been forever … but her ity was.’

I just can’t. I will die again if my tombstone ever says that. I mean, I know I am pretty much-exaggerating everything in my life right now but I’m really scared of riding that ferry. Also, what if I throw up? I don’t want to throw up in front of Baekhyun. That’s just on another level of humiliating. “Are you okay? You haven’t talked since we got off the train.” I feel my boyfriend’s warm hand on top of mine, waking me from my gruesome daze. Her life may not have been forever … but her ity was. That tombstone message echoes in my head as I look at him. “What if I drown later?” I blurt out with the biggest pout ever.

Baekhyun stared at me in terror until a smile slowly forms on his lips. “Uh—love? It takes us five minutes. Are you actually worried about the ferry?” He covers his mouth as if he couldn’t believe reality right now. “Do you want to do the zip-line instead? That’s another way we can get there. Even I am afraid of that but I’d definitely try it if we’re together.” My eyes grow bigger in much horror. “Exactly, I figured you wouldn’t be too thrilled with that idea either. So, let’s stick with the ferry option, hm?” My boyfriend nods at me in amusement.

My mouth slowly curves down into a long frown as I fake a sob. “Why didn’t you remind me about the ferry, I could have mentally prepared for it.” I quietly say and Baekhyun lifts my hand higher until I could feel his forehead against my skin. “I’m sorry—I should have expected this little freak out from you over a five-minute ferry ride.” He mumbles softly but I could hear the stifled laugh he is hiding behind the apology. I pull my hand away as I glare at him. I was right, he was laughing. I bounce on my seat harshly and fold my arms across my chest. “Meanie.” I mouth back before looking to the window.

I feel his hand slip behind me on the neck and he pulls me in, I move my bum obediently to sit closer to him. “You can hold on to me for the whole five-minute ferry ride, you don’t even need to look at the water. We will stay away from the edge and then you can keep your eyes close. How about that?” He suggests which tempts me quickly. I narrow my eyes at him. “I’ll still feel the movement, what if I get seasick?” I argue back.

He puckers his lips cutely as he thinks. His shoulders fall in frustration as he glares down at me. “Okay, come on. Noona, it’s not like we have a choice right now. You’re going to get used to it because we’re gonna be riding it more than once throughout this trip, just pull through from the first ride and you’ll be fine after. Even if we drove to get here, we’re still going to have to ride the ferry anyway. Unless you own a private jet. Do you? Because I don’t. You literally picked Nami Island; did you not think of the ferry at all? This isn’t a K-drama, we’re not going to magically teleport there on the next episode, noona.” I scrunch my nose at him and hiss at him like a cat. Meanie, he has the nerve to use my K-drama fever against me. So annoying.

He bumps his forehead against mine as he chuckles. “You’ll be fine, hm? Don’t worry, just hold me if you get scared. Just five minutes, I promise. I will sue the captain if it’s more than that. We’ll count from one to three hundred together and before you know it, we’re there. Don’t worry, please?” His soothing voice glides into my ear as he plants small kisses on my temple.

I finally smile. “You’re actually going to sue even if it’s one second delayed, okay? Promise me.” I mutter and I receive that usual I’m-so-done expression from him every time I throw unnecessary comments and jokes into serious conversations. “Okay okay, I’m kidding. Aigoo, can’t take a joke.” I flick him on the forehead lightly and he narrows his eyes at me, so cute.  

Well … I guess I’m taking the ferry and hold onto my boyfriend as if my life depends on him. In this situation, it literally does. Titanic is one of my favourite classic movies but it’s also one of my worst nightmares since it basically happened in real life. It’s funny how I’m comparing such a tragic event to a five-minute ferry ride to Nami Island. I’m so bad, ugh. I hate myself for being such a coward.

My new motto for this trip is, ‘My life may not be forever … but so as my ity.’

Yes, Lord. I’m sorry but I’m losing it on this trip. Forgive me in advance. I have waited long enough. Shim Dohee Version 2.0, see ya!

We arrive at our hotel and holy crap, it’s a hotel and resort. This explains why we had a whole debate about why he has to pay for everything. I didn’t win in the end. In return though, he agreed to let me pay for food, at least. I initially thought that he booked us in some cheap inn or something. I did not expect this at all. I see you, Byun Baekhyun. This man knows what he’s doing, hm. I’m totally into this idea. Summer is about to end and this is the perfect way to say goodbye to it and welcome another season.

Oh my god, I didn’t even prepare a bathing suit! I don’t even own one, what am I supposed to do now? Baekhyun just keeps surprising me and our trip hasn’t even technically started yet. I’ve always known him to be so quiet and humble about his plans simply because he’s not really the best decision-maker out there but I must say, I am very impressed right now. He is good in planning stuff alright. I feel like this whole trip was all well-thought off by him, I should have known from his personality. I guess I could do some shopping around here later if we ever end up swimming, I’m pretty sure there’d be a lot of places for that.

I am way too amazed to even talk right now. Baekhyun takes care of everything, checking in and talking to all the staff who leads us in our room—wait, wrong, I mean suite. I heard the staff say suite. Good God, this boyfriend of mine just keeps checking off all the boxes in my Boyfriend Material Check List that don’t even really exist and are all in my head.

Light wood interior. Hardwood floors. Blackout curtains. King-sized bed. Large flat-screen TV. A mini kitchen and a small cute dining table with two chairs. A big fat balcony that shows the beautiful water from afar. And, drum roll please … indoor jacuzzi, baby. “What the f—” I cover my mouth as I stare at the biggest bathroom I have ever seen in my entire life. The jacuzzi is like a whole space by itself, with only a glass wall as a barrier so it’s both visible from the bathroom and the bedroom itself. I almost cursed for the very first time right there but I was able to stop myself. The hotel attendant leaves the room and that’s when I glare at Baekhyun in astonishment. “What are all these?!” I throw my hands up in air as I look around.

Did I get married and now on my honeymoon without me even knowing?

I am beyond surprised by these.

Baekhyun casually leans by the wall while looking around. “Look around.” He gestures to me to keep going. I skip straight towards the balcony to look outside. “Suddenly, the ferry isn’t so scary anymore, right?” I hear him say behind me. “Oh my god, we need to split the bill, Baekhyun. Can you just let me help you with his?” I turn around not knowing he’s already right behind me. My back meets the glass door of the balcony and he pins me down. “Well, technically all the years of you coming to me for hair appointments made it easy for me to afford this, right?”

I bump the back of my head on the glass door while groaning. “This has to be expensive though, how about let me pay at least twenty percent of it? Hm? That’s it. Please? Just let me, it will make me feel more at ease to enjoy this place knowing I helped you pay for it.” I rub my palms together to plead. “We agreed that you pay for food instead. You can’t take that back now.” He resists and pulls me closer by the waist. I pout even more. “Baekhyun, please. Just let me—”

He cups my face and presses his thumb on my lips to stop me from talking. “This is three years’ worth of wanting to take you out on a date but I didn’t and let you go through all those pointless Tinder dates instead when I knew I could take care of you better. Please, just allow me this once?” His voice is soft and it melts me easily. Oh my god, that’s … so sweet to hear. “I do—don’t feel like I deserve this at all—I mean, what have I done for you? Hm? I haven’t done a single thing for you.” I put my arm around his neck and our bodies