PLAYLIST: “Cry For Love,” Baekhyun

BAEKHYUN

I am quite surprised that I am not disliking this get-together so far. It’s humble; no booze or loud music—just me and my salon team spending some quality time together and reveling in our impending launch. Bomi noona has a beautiful homely house, specifically a spacious backyard with a patio and a pool. I personally love it and aim to own a similar one in the future. I also love the mini playground that they have for her two kids. She has two young daughters whom I always adored. Siyoung and Hayoung. Bomi noona always told me that they like me the most amongst the other stylists since I am soft-hearted and, in her own words, less cuckoo.

I crouch down when Hayoung gestures me to look at another one of her drawings. After I have commented on one that she had pinned on the fridge earlier, she began showing me more. “Oh? You drew that? Wow—you draw so well; how did you do that? That’s amazing.” She giggles hard and abruptly climbs on my lap while holding the drawing. I press my arms around her tiny body as I hold the top end of the paper while she grips on the bottom. “This one, Siyoung unni help me color! This flower, I copy from the backyard. You see the flowers outside?” She leans comfortably against my chest making me chuckle.

Bomi noona comes in from the backyard, smiling at me apologetically. “It’s okay.” I mouth at her with an assuring smile. I really don’t mind, to be honest. The other stylists are all hanging out in the backyard right now but Hayoung dragged me inside to show her works of art. “Aigoo, Hayoungee. Uncle Baekhyun might want to hang out with the other uncles and aunts?” Bomi noona approaches us and plops down on the arm of the couch.  “Noona, I think she’s going to be an artist too, oh? Look at this. It’s amazing.” I show her the same drawing making the kid snigger.

The mother gestures the kid to get off my lap. “Okay, sweetie. Why don’t you help your Siyoung unni outside? She’s scooping ice cream for everyone. How about you get one for Uncle Baekhyun too? Come on, be a good girl for Eomma.” She taps the kid’s bum to give her a boost. “Uncle, I will bring you ice cream!” The kid sings out before scurrying away. “She’s adorable.” I set the drawing back to the coffee table and lean comfortably on the couch. “Oh, I forgot to ask, why didn’t you bring Dohee along? I told you, you can. See, Sara brought her boyfriend too.” Bomi noona slides off the arm of the couch to finally sit more restfully beside me. As much as I would have loved that, I know Dohee wouldn’t be too thrilled by the idea. She’s not going to feel too comfortable and it all worked out in the end anyway, I just got off the phone with her about an hour ago and she told me that Kyungsoo actually threw her a surprise birthday celebration at a nice barbeque restaurant.

Her boss still very much irks me for some reason but at least he’s giving her what she deserves. After all, she has done him a lot of favors—that includes not quitting even after what he has done to her a couple of months ago. The was such a hard pill to swallow but I had to respect Dohee’s decisions. Fortunately, she hasn’t told me anything worrisome so far. I am a very forgiving person but for some reason, my blood just boils instantly every time I’d see him with her. There’s just something about him that bothers me and I don’t know what it is. Ever since that incident happened in front of my salon, I never looked at him the same again—not that I ever liked him prior to it anyway. He just emits this very undesirable aura that I do not appreciate being around Dohee.

I know that I’ve always preached of never judging someone if you don’t know them well yet but I am still human, I am flawed, I am not always consistent. I can’t always apply that belief to everyone even if I wanted to. At least, not towards a person who has hurt the woman I love.

“She’s actually in a company dinner too, unfortunately. Since it’s her birthday on Saturday, they threw her a party.” Bomi noona gives me a considerate nod. “Sorry if I took you away from her for her birthday—I hope she wasn’t upset about it.” She peers at me, her eyebrows losing their arch. I pop my shoulders back while straightening my shirt. “She understands, I mean it’s work. And also, I blocked my December 1st and 2nd as soon as I saw that it was still pretty empty, I hope that’s okay? If you need to think about it, I’ll just unblock it again and we can discuss another time for me to take off. Dohee and I are hoping to go camping.” I grin timidly. Bomi noona fakes a glare at me but switches her expression quickly into a grin. “Yeah, of course—oh, speaking of camping, I have a vacation lodge in the countryside that is close to the beach and a campsite. I mean, it might be too cold at the beach by that time but it’s still romantic to walk around there as long as you two are layered up. You want to borrow the lodge?” She nudges me teasingly. “One favor though, don’t use the master’s bedroom or my kids’ bedrooms to sleep or whatever. Just … I don’t know, you two will be alone anyway so you can even sleep in the living room by the fireplace—which is also romantic, by the way. I just don’t want any dirty deeds done in the rooms. Bring your own tatamis or something!”

My eyes bulge in delight. “Ar—are you serious?”

There’s a short pause from her as she leans on the couch more, crossing her arms against her chest. Just then, Hayoung comes back with my ice cream. “Uncle, ice cream for you. Chocolate!” She hands it to me but before I could get a hold of it, Siyoung follows in holding an ice cream as well. “Uncle, take mine instead. This is better, strawberry!” The two kids shove the two cups of ice cream close to my face, so close that I had to throw my head back while laughing. “Aigoo, you kids. Just put it on the coffee table, I’m sure Uncle would love to eat both of them. Alright, it’s already past ten. You should both wash up and get ready for bed. I already let you stay for an extra hour. You still have school tomorrow. Come on, chop-chop.” Bomi noona manages to shoo the kids away again before nudging me on the arm once again. “Of course, I’m serious. Sara and Taewoo had borrowed it before, they even brought their families with them. Don’t be shy, you’re like family to me.” I can’t help but smile widely which I try to hide with the back of my hand. “Thank you, noona. I’ll let Dohee know about it, see what she thinks.”

There was a brief silence in the living room until my boss speaks again. “By the way, I’ve always wanted to ask you, just how long have you liked Dohee?” The question slips out of so easily as she smiles at me impishly. “Come on, I’ve been in this industry much longer than you have. You can’t fool me, I’ve been interested in my clients before when I was still single, I am experienced in this department. Don’t think that I have stopped observing you just because you’re my director. Don’t forget that our stations are right beside each other. I see everything, sweetheart. Just tell me honestly, how long have you had the hots for her?”

I avoid her gaze as soon as I feel my lips quivering for a smile. “I don’t know—long time, I guess.” I vaguely answer since I am too embarrassed to admit the exact duration of my infatuation. “I must say though, you’ve changed all these years since you’ve known her.” She laughs before grabbing one of the ice cream cups and gestures me to start eating some. I gladly take it. “Is that … a good thing or a bad thing?” I take a spoonful of the cold dessert and let the strawberry flavor melt in my mouth. “Okay, let me explain in detail then.” She clears and braces herself, facing me better. Oh god, what if she about to say now? This is scaring me for some reason. Our isn’t so huge but I’ve always viewed her as a second mother and a mentor. It matters to me what she thinks.

“Remember seven years ago when I just hired you? I gave you the assistant position even if you were already a licensed stylist?” She reminds me of such a crucial past which makes me sigh. “Yeah … I remember that, I was still a newbie stylist though so I understood why you did what you did. I assisted you for a year and a half until you finally put me on the floor. That was … that was hard, I must admit.” I laugh it out now but before, it really felt wrong for me. I was have already started my career officially from the previous salon I came from, I was ready to build my clientele in her salon but instead, she put me in the lowest possible position. “You know why I did that? I had to test you. We were very close at age and I didn’t want you to act superior right away just because of it. When I interviewed you the first time, you were very poise. The second time I met you, you brought in a model right from the streets and did an amazing job with no worries, very passionate, still. In the third interview, you passed once again and maintained the same demeanor. It was hard to believe that you were a newbie stylist So, at first, I couldn’t tell if it was needless arrogance or just healthy confidence so I had to check and challenge you.”

Wow, she’s really getting into the detail. Why so sudden? Where is she trying to get at here?

It is starting to make me wonder a little bit. How is this related to Dohee at all?

“Uhm, you mean … you were intimidated by me?” I ask and to my surprise, she only shrugs as if agreeing half-heartedly. She wags her finger at me. “Maybe? But obviously, I had to make the hierarchy clear between us cause I’m a bad , you know that. I said to myself, if he’s just being cocky, he’ll start hating me for not letting him work on the floor yet and it will show in his work, whether it’s laundry or as simple as making a drink for a client. You will end up quitting and it will prove to me that you’re just an arrogant newbie. But nothing changed. Still, the same young man I interviewed all those three times, all the way.” I nod as I gesture her to go on. “And for some reason, by the second year of working for me unofficially as an assistant, you started bringing in models at every end of your shift, every single night before you closed, you’d stay in the salon until midnight sometimes. You even paid for the hair products you’d use on the models with your own money and gave them the service for free just so you could prove yourself to me. You’d email me every photo of your works, hundreds of them in the span of two years.”

I laugh at the particular memory. “And you never responded.” She echoes what I said, also giggling. “At the end, I was just like okay, I give up, I’ll let this kid do whatever he wants, he’s very persistent and I don’t want him to keep giving these amazing free services cause it’s a waste of money and effort. So, I officially made you part of the team and signed you a contract as my stylist. Within five months, you were able to build your own clientele that included the models you picked up from the streets—like complete strangers you picked up from the streets. I don’t know how the hell you got the guts to do that even. I didn’t even do that, my models back in my days were my friends.” I look away while nodding. It wasn’t as easy as it sounds. I really had to work my way to the top and basically be completely shameless at the time. I remember even going to public bath and sauna houses to recruit hair models.

Just imagine me in a matching blue shirt and shorts, a towel wrapped on my head, and a thick portfolio that I carried around to show people just so they would let me do their hair. It wasn’t easy for an introvert like me.

“This is … still connected to me changing after getting to know Dohee, right?” I stifle a laugh but she only nods. “Just listen! Aish—” She slaps my arm before flipping her hair sassily. “Anyway, so damage control, your schedule was blowing up way too fast and you’re even unknowingly taking other stylists’ clients which could have caused conflicts within the salon, so I had to get rid of you for a while and send you to the army.” My eyes widen in disagreement. Okay, that was not what happened at all. She’s totally bullting me right now and it’s just funny. “Noona, I chose to go to the army—what are you saying.” I am smiling but the creases on my eyebrows are deepening in confusion. “That’s not the point. Okay, what I wanted to say is that … when you got back from the army, you actually changed. You became reserved and quieter and it actually worried me. I didn’t know if you’ll still be the same confident stylist that I got to know previously.”

My shoulders droop in realization. She doesn’t know much about the details but … that was actually around the time when my parents had decided to permanently reside in the states to be with my older brother who had been studying there. In the beginning, they would just go back and forth a lot but around that time before I finished serving, they told me that they had sold the house I grew up in and will officially leave their practice here in South Korea and advance their careers in the states together with my brother.

They didn’t simply abandon me, however. They actually … gave me one last chance to reconsider my career, move with them to the states and finally choose the path that they believe is best for me. I still chose my hair artistry and I will admit that for a while, I was afraid that I made the wrong decisions. I was afraid that I am going to regret it eventually.

“You still did great in your work, skills are the same and all but … it was almost like, you were dead inside? Until one day … you once again unintentionally stole another stylist’s client. Taewoo’s returning client at the time, Shim Dohee.” My whole body loosens as I stare in space. “And somehow, gradually, I started seeing the usual Baekhyun that I thought was gone after the military service. It’s like she brought you back the life that the military out of you? I mean it d