PLAYLIST: “Weak,” SWV

BAEKHYUN

Mist of alcohol burst right at my face, only giving me a microsecond to close my eyes and mouth. Well, that’s some response. I reach for my eyes to rub them off, I feel the cold sensation soaking my shirt as well but I ignore it. That is none of my concerns right now. I came here to claim her once and for all. I will not allow another jerk to hurt her or make her feel any less. Yesterday and today have been tough for her and it's a wake-up call for me ... and hopefully for her too. I went through today filled with thoughts of her, I could barely concentrate at work. If I wasn't a responsible and mature employee, I would have just ditched work completely right then and there.

We obviously need each other and I don't see any reason to hold back any longer. I'm just allowing more people to hurt her and I am hurting myself as well in the process.

Once I feel less drenched around my eyes, I open them to look at her again. She looks horrified—well, she did just spit beer on my face. I hear a stifled giggle from her as she covers with both hands. “Well, that’s … a first,” I say and that’s when she burst out of laughter. Never in my life have someone spit on my face, let alone spit beer. I don't even like beer. Although, it's all good. I am not upset at her. It's a ... natural Shim Dohee reaction, I guess. I should have seen it coming. Well, not directly at my face, however. And definitely not beer. I actually feel relieved that she looked less tensed now after what happened—whatever makes her happy, right? “Uhm, can I—can I wash my face? This is gonna be sticky later on.” I chuckle and without any hesitation, Dohee grabs me by the wrist and drags me to the bathroom.

“Uhm, your shirt is fine, right? Or do you need a new one—I might have something that could fit you. But if it’s alright, then just leave it.” Dohee reluctantly asks me before I begin splashing water on my face. I run my wet fingers across my hair as well just to make sure it is clear of the drink. I don’t think alcohol in your hair is a very good regime in general. Once I feel clean enough, I turn the faucet off and I look up at the mirror. I swipe my damp hair all back before looking at her. “It depends on how this conversation will go. If I could stay here longer then I might prefer to change. If not … then I’ll just go and change at home.” I am straightforward to her question.

I see the veins on her neck contract as she gulps a couple of times. “Oh—towel, you should wipe yourself up too. Sorry, just a sec—here, I should have something in here.” She doesn’t disclose the topic just yet but I understand. This is all so new to her. The last thing I want to do is to force her into making a decision. She steps into the bathroom completely and grabs a fresh towel from the cabinet. She approaches me closely and tries to hand me the towel but I don’t take it. “So? How is this conversation gonna go?” I ask her instead. Her eyes travel across my hair down to my face and without answering, she begins wiping me herself. I just give her my intense gaze hoping it could find her words. I want to hear it from her. I am dying to hear it from her. “Tell me how you want it to go.” I stop her hand from wiping but I keep it close to my face. I allow myself to find warmth from her touch, relieving me of the coldness of the water I just washed with.

Her hand trembles in my hold but I don’t let go. “I sup—suppose I could get you a shirt.” She finally answers and my eyes flare in wonder. Is that a yes, technically? She wants me to stay here with her. She wants me, doesn’t she? “You want that? Okay.” I simply before letting her go. Before she could leave the bathroom, I remove my shirt in front of her. She lets out a very audible gasp which she attempts to cover with the towel. I roll my shirt in a ball before putting it aside on the sink. “You go ahead, find me a shirt. I hope you find one, you’re … a pretty petite woman, I hope something would fit me.” I allow her to go but she doesn’t move from her position. Instead, I catch her gazing on my bare chest and down my abdomen. I just let her do it, letting her eyes explore what’s in front of her.

I am a pretty humble person but I know when I look good. I keep myself healthy physically and mentally. It’s not that I am teasing … no, I guess I am. A little bit. But I just want her to know that I am all hers.

Dohee finally moves after a while, pointing out of the bathroom. “I’ll—I’ll go find you one now.” She frantically runs out of the bathroom and I just follow her. I stop just in front of her bedroom; the door is fully open letting me see what is inside. It’s a decent-sized bedroom a combination of white and lavender surrounds the room. She owns a king-sized bed which surprises me, it almost takes up most of the extra space in the room. “Your bed is pretty big,” I comment without hesitation. From the closet, I hear a shy chuckle come out of her. “I love to sleep comfortably, with my arms and legs spread open, you know, like a starfish.” She replies making me smile. “Hm, I hope that’s not going to be an issue later on then. I don’t want to be falling off the bed if you hog it.” I retort in a chuckle.

I suddenly hear a loud thud, as if something fell. My reflex makes me step into the bed without asking for permission anymore. “Are you ok—okay?” I ask and I finally see what could have fallen. It’s a black bin that is now fully open, spilling all sorts of clothes on the floor. “Yeah, I was—I was looking through old clothes. This bin just … fell.” She replies and begins picking all the clothes up. Without further asking, I help her pick up the clothes and folding it again. She stops me. “No, just—you can just throw it in here, I will fold it later myself.” She tells me and I just do as she says.

I pick up as many clothes as I could and throw them in the bin. Once it’s all inside, I grab the big bin from her to carry it myself. “Where do you want me to put it back?” I ask and she points up on a shelf panel on top of the closet. “Wait—did you find a shirt for me yet?” I ask, the bin halfway into the shelf. “Yeah, I—I did.” She lifts her hand showing a white shirt. “This is a pretty old one and I used it for sleeping before so it’s kind of shabby. But this is the biggest one I could find.” She explains with her eyes lowered. I put the bin all the way in before sliding the closet door closed. I grab the shirt from her, it’s a pretty big shirt for her, and … it’s very thin. I can just imagine her wearing only this and it is already driving me crazy. “Yeah, this would fit perfectly. It’s a little thin though.” I chuckle before wearing it anyway.

Without even looking at me anymore, she turns to leave but I grab her back. “Wh—what?” She asks but instead of saying anything, I just pull her close enough until our bodies are touching. “So, you want me to stay longer then,” I whisper as I brush my fingers on her hair. It’s my favorite thing to do. It could be because I am a hairstylist but I just … love touching her hair and getting that same weak reaction from her. “What does that mean for us?” I add but she still doesn’t say anything. “You know, if you continue staying quiet, I’m gonna have to confirm it myself. And I’d rather much prefer hearing it from you.” I peer at her face, slightly moving it up with my hands so she could look back at me.

“Bu—but … why?” Words finally find her, although barely. I smile down at her as I lean closer, the tips of our noses almost touching. “Why?” I whisper and without further explaining through words, I explain it through my kiss. I feel her body tense up against me but it only encourages me to keep going. Her trembling lips eventually start moving along mine, in the tenderest way that drives me even more senseless. I slip both my hands on her neck as I thumb her jawline. I deepen the kiss just enough to get a moan from her. Her warm palms finally find their way to my chest when I pull her even closer to me until I had to lean against her closet.

I feel heat swamp my whole body and I just knew I am very close to losing my grip on self-control. I pull away from the kiss but as she always does, she tries to catch my mouth back to hers. It always gets me going when she does that. It's so y and inviting. it's always hard to believe she has very minimal experience with these things. She's so adventurous and I love drowning in her kisses. I smile as I her hungry lips with my thumb. “Slow down,” I whisper in between heavy breaths.

If anything, I am the one who needs to slow down, seriously.

Hotness overwhelms me but it's too soon for me to go all the way with her and I know … that I will end up going to that path if I don’t stop yet. I need full control over my head before my heart and body eventually take over. I don’t want to rush her into anything but I do want to slowly get her comfortable with things. Like pleasure. I want to get more of her curiosity. I want to introduce her to new emotions that only I could give her. “Tell me first, I wanna hear it from you.” I let a big smile take over my lips as I rest my forehead against her. “Tell me … am I your man?” The way she bites her bottom lip makes me quiver in response. She’s so effortlessly … hot. How am I supposed to keep my willpower when she’s so naturally alluring like this? Without verbally answering, however, she embraces me tightly until her face is buried on my chest. I then hear the softest okay vibrate through my skin. I chuckle in pure gladness as I hug her back, resting my chin on top of her head.

She must be very self-conscious right now. I will be patient with her.

I sigh. “Okay, we probably should … get back out in the living room. It's getting a little hot in here.” I wander my