Heechul POV

I, Kim Heechul, never felt so close to losing myself. Super Junior had already debuted the first song for our 4jib. The song alone made me go insane with how crazy hot the dance moves, the ing of the hips, and how masculine Eunhyuk looked. In fact, if it weren't for the silly hat that the coordinators made him wear I would have for sure lost myself.

It was hard for me everday throughout the shooting for Bonamana not to catch myself off guard. I was being careful as was Lee Donghae. Even he seemed to know exactly how I felt for Eunhyuk during those days because I was sure he was feeling the same.

It is during these days where Super Junior still performs on stage for our 4jib, that I truly feel that I am losing myself. Everyday seeing Eunhyuk dance on stage, moving his body easily to the beat of the song...all of our heartbeats beating as one...it made me want Eunhyuk more than ever. Every night I dreamed of pushing him down onto the floor, ripping off his clothes, and making him mine forever.

Also during these days we are filming our next music video for 'No Other'. Not only is this a love song but its also a music video that aims to show all of us trying to confess to a girl that we like. As I sat in the middle of a fake library pretending to write a letter, my mind wondered to Eunhyuk endlessly. It wondered to the point where I was actually writing a letter to him.

I feared I had really lost it and that there would come a time when I could no longer hold myself back anymore. I really wanted Eunhyuk for myself. I didn't want Donghae to be in the picture anymore, but I wasn't sure how I could go about getting rid of him.

I wanted to take Eunhyuk out for dates but I didn't know how to do that either without making it suspicious to him or to the public... there were so many barriers that obstructed me from the path I wanted to follow that the only thing I could do was continue to get Eunhyuk away from the other members for a few minutes.

However, I promised myself that tonight would be different. Tonight, I would begin to make Eunhyuk mine no matter how much it hurt the other people in Super Junior...no matter how it hurt Eunhyuk and no matter how much it hurt Donghae. It was official that Eunhyuk would become mine.

It was simple. I asked Eunhyuk out for a walk like I usually did when I wanted to talk to him alone. It was a little harder now though since we had busy schedules again. We had just gotten back to our dorm when I asked him to accompany me. We also had a schedule early in the morning.

"Hyung, can't we do this some other time?" Eunhyuk questioned as he held a hand over his mouth while he yawned. I pouted, pretending that it was something urgent...that I couldn't wait to get something off my chest, which wasn't far from the truth.

As Eunhyuk finally put on a jacket to follow me outside, I smiled happily. He led the way like all the other times while I stared at his back happily. I was finally going to push forward with my dream. I was finally going to make the boy I had been dreaming of realize my feelings for him.

It was no time before we reached our regular hang out spot at the playground. That is when my heartbeat began to beat unsteadily but not fast paced. I realized that I wasn't different from most people. I didn't get embarrassed or nervous about these things. I just said what I had to.

"Hyung, what's on your mind?" Eunhyuk questioned me. I was facing away from him, a large smirk placed on my face. I was incapable of stopping it so I simply just had to look away.

"Hyukkie-ah, you want all of Super Junior to be closer right?" I questioned. I knew what his answer would be. I had known all along what it would be because of the show of EHB that we appeared on where Shindong tricked him. At that time Eunhyuk had cried for no reason over the fear that Super Junior might disband, and that Shindong had said that he wanted more rapping parts.

Eunhyuk always had a kind, gentle heart that anyone could see from the first moment they met this man. I had unfortunately looked over it when I had first met him.

I fought to control my smirk as I turned around to face Eunhyuk. He was looking seriously at the ground beneath his feet.

"Hyung that is what I want most in this world. I want for Super Junior to be everlasting, to be forever... but why do you ask me this?" Eunhyuk questioned me once again. I paced around in front of him, trying to add to the effect of what I wanted to say.

"What if I said that we couldn't be closer..."

"Why couldn't we?" Eunhyuk interrupted me. I cleared my throat to restart.

"If I said we couldn't be closer because someone had feelings for someone who has feelings for someone else. What if friendship that is wanting to go forward can't because of someone else?" I questioned him. It was obvious I had put him in an awkward situation as he thought about Donghae and himself.

"Lee Hyuk Jae," I called him, using his real name for the first time in a long time. He looked up at me with a tear stained face. "I like you...a lot," I confessed to him not letting a single second pass by too quickly. His expression quickly turned to one of suprise and fear.

"Hyung...I don't..." He began to say but then lost the words to continue. I knew from the start he didn't love me. It was obvious he was in love with Donghae.

"Hyukkie...for the fate of Super Junior...can't you be with me? Why do you have to be with Donghae? Can't you tell that I die every time I see you with him? The reason why I picked on you on that show? Don't you see it all now?" I questioned, my voice taking on a sound of its own as I pleaded with someone for the first time in my life.

"Your playing around with me aren't you?" Eunhyuk suddenly questioned as he looked around for some hidden cameras. However, nothing and no one popped out of the bushes. "You are being serious?" Eunhyuk's voice sounded with fear. It was obvious he wanted to run away at that moment. "Heechul...I..." his voice stumbled for the correct words once again.

"You said you wanted the best for Super Junior...you said you wanted Super Junior to be together forever...what if that can only happen if you be with me?" I questioned him, my voice turning to its regular huskiness. As much as it to be the evil one sometimes it did come out to be pretty useful.

"I have to be with you to allow Super Junior to continue?" Eunhyuk questioned. A part of me was torn at seeing the light in his eyes begin to die away with what was left of his relationship with Donghae, but the other half was jumping for joy that he was coming to me.

"I won't allow Super Junior to be the same if you aren't with me. I need you Eunhyuk..." My voice returned to that pleading, irregular voice that I only got when I was around him. He stared at me in surprise.

"What do you think Donghae will do?" He asked me. I gritted my teeth at hearing Donghae's name being spoken. No matter what Eunhyuk always cared about Donghae first and foremost. I watched as the boy sank to the ground. His whole world was being shattered and it only took a matter of minutes, however, I was sure that he would do anything to protect the name Super Junior...even if it meant he would lose his own reason for living...Donghae.

"What will it be Eunhyuk? Me or Donghae? Super Junior or not? It's your decision..." I pressed on. I couldn't hold back against my original plan. I knew I would only recieve Eunhyuk's hatred this way but atleast I would have him for myself. I wanted him more than anything else I wanted in my life. It tortured me to watch Eunhyuk's face fill up with tears as he looked around for some way out of this mess...it tortured me to know that I was the reason for it...but I knew it would be worth it in the end.

"Fine Kim Heechul...I'll do it...for Super Junior...I'll do it..." Eunhyuk finally answered me, his voice full of bitterness but I could only hear the sound of him accepting me...

here you go :] another chapter just for you guys. sorry it took so long. ive been doing school work and then since the system went down I had to redo some chapters for my other story and other then that I just haven't been in the mood to write. mianhae. but here you go...i hope Heechul isn't too evil for you guys and i didn't really capture how evil he is i felt but let me know if you like it or if it needs to be more evillll. and poor hyukkie i feel like he goes through so much in all of my stories :[ dont worry hyukkie you will get a perfect ending in real life :D eunhae hwaiting!!

-LHY