Eunhyuk POV

I quickly ran out of my own dorm, booking it up the flight of stairs to the next floor, and flinging myself into the other dorm room. To my surprise, Donghae was sitting in the living room in a pair of sweatpants, his hair wet from just getting out of the shower. He stared at me, his gaze deep and sad. I composed my self and cleared my throat.

"Where is Heechul?" I asked slowly, unsure of how Donghae would take my question.

"Hyuk Jae..." He said slowly, as if he had something important to say to me. "Heechul...told me earlier that he was entering the army..." He said. I stared wide eyed at him. Why was he the first one to know about Heechul's entrance into the army? Why hadn't he told me. My mind was moving to fast to think about what he had told me earlier. "He asked me to give you to him until he leaves..." Donghae again said very slowly, studying me very closely to see what my reaction would me.

"Donghae..." I said slowly, partly happy and partly upset about these events. I was happy I would be able to have Donghae back freely again, but it was at the cost of losing Kim Heechul... the Kim Heechul who said he loved me without reason. The person who I had nothing to do with at first...to a person who I came to like and trust as someone I knew my whole life.

"He's in his room," He said quickly, nodding his head to tell me to go ahead and meet with him. I slowly walked down the hallway to Heechul's room, which he now lived in alone since Hangeng left. I opened his door without knocking, finding Kim Heechul laying in his bed, staring up at the ceiling with his hands under his head.

"Kim Heechul," I said sternly, gaining his attention. I closed the door behind me as he sat up in his bed, staring at me with wide eyes. "How could you not tell me?" I nearly began to cry all ready. "The army? Why? Why are you leaving me? You said you'd never leave," My bottom lip began to quiver as I tried to fight back the coming tears. Heechul looked away from me, unable to face me any longer.

"I can't...Eunhyuk... I can't see you going through this much pain... I can't see you dying in front of me..." Heechul bowed his head, his voice gave him away that he was also about to cry. I ran to him, pounding his back as hard as I could.

"You promised! You promised..." I screamed continuously until my own tears made me collapse to the floor of Heechul's bedroom.

"Mianhae Eunhyuk...Mianhae," Heechul whispered, barely above a whisper... "I can't live in a world without you..." Heechul finally gave in to his own tears, collapsing onto his bed and covering his face.

"If you loved me... you would stay with me," I growled at him through my tears.

"I do love you...that is why I'm giving you to someone who you love...to who you really want to be with," Heechul replied. "I'd rather see you alive and healthy with someone other than me... than with me and dying slowly," Heechul said barely above a whisper. I turned my head to stare at him. He had a serious look on his face. "Just do me a favor...and for this next month...love me...love me like you love him...so I can let you go with a smile," Kim Heechul begged. I shook my head unable to accept the fact that he was giving up so simply...that he believed that I wasn't going to live...that I wasn't living for him and everyone else in this building.

"Pabo," I cried. "Pabo," I said even louder the second time. I wanted to scream, to hit him, but I couldn't...because in reality, what Kim Heechul said made sense...but I didn't want to believe that he loved me this much... to give me up...

Kim Heechul slipped off his bed and put his arms around me, holding me tightly to him. It was such a soothing effect that I would have fallen asleep in his arms, if he hadn't forced me back onto my feet, and walked me back down to my own dorm. He paused at the door, turning me around to face him.

"What I said earlier today...at the playground...I really, really meant it..." He said slowly before kissing my forehead and pushing me into my dorm. I stared at the door long after he had left, still unable to move from that spot.

"Hyuk Jae?" Leeteuk's voice cut me out of my daydream quickly, and made me realize that the whole group was still awake, staring at me... "Is it true?" Leeteuk asked. I wanted to say no, to please them all but I couldn't lie either. I closed my eyes tightly and nodded, and just as quickly the room became in a state of uproar again.

"How can he not tell us first? Why did we have to find out from the news?" Siwon yelled loudly before leaving our dorm, obviously heading to find Kim Heechul, with practically everyone else following him. Ryeowook stayed with me, hugging me tightly, trying to comfort me...

"You can't really blame him... he would have to go sooner or later..." Ryeowook said. I nodded, realizing the truth in his words... Heechul's words from the playground replayed in my mind. 'You know I love you right...' he had asked me. 'Good...I don't want you to ever stop thinking that...no matter what happens' is what he had told me then. So this is what he meant...that he would always love me no matter what happened between us.

"Excuse me Ryeowook..." I excused myself to my room, taking out my cell phone as I did so. I dialed my managers number hoping to catch him still awake at this late hour.

"Ah...Hyuk Jae...what is it?" The manager's voice came over the speaker of my cell phone.

"I want to appear on Strong Heart one last time...with all the members," I insisted. There was a long pause over the cell phone.

"I'll see what I can do," The manager said before hanging up. There was something I needed to do before Kim Heechul left for the army, before I would stop my career as a singer for a while, but hopefully not forever. I sat on my bed, thinking of Heechul who must be hurting a lot right now...along with everyone else... This isn't want I wanted... I didn't want anyone to worry about me...reminding me of what I still had to tell my parents and noona. I picked up my cell phone, deciding it was about time to tell them.

"Hyuk Jae?" My mom's voice vibrated the room. She was usually up late.

"Omma..." I whispered into my cell phone. "What are you doing?" I brought up a question first.

"I'm watching some tv... I saw the news about Heechul...are you ok?" Her worried voice kept me silent. I didn't want to hear her crying...I didn't want to see anyone crying...

"I'm ok... Omma... can you turn off the tv for a while?" I asked, becoming more serious. There was a pause as the sound in the background died.

"What is it Hyuk Jae?" My mom asked, her voice sounding even more worried.

"Are you sitting down? Is dad around? What about noona?" I asked several questions, all that got a positive answer. "Mom put me on speaker phone, araso?" I asked my mom, and there was another pause as my command was fulfilled. "Omma...Appa...Noona...I have something I need to tell you..." I said slowly, not really wishing for them to know anything. "A few weeks ago... I was diagnosed..." My voice faultered slightly but I pushed through. "With cancer," I said, immediately hearing gasps on the other side.

"No...No...there must be a mistake..." I heard my noona say, her voice soft and worried. My noona and I have always been close siblings. I heard crying on the other line, most likely my omma...and then my father's voice.

"Hyuk Jae...I think we need some time to digest this information..." My father announced.

"Mmm I understand...I'll come visit soon," I promised. "Saranghaeyo," I said softly before hanging up the phone. I collapsed onto my bed, throwing the covers over me...hoping to disappear entirely for hurting so many people...for the first time I really disliked my life...I disliked being alive...even though I've been through hard times before...this was most deffinitely the worst. I cried for hours until I finally became too tired to cry anymore.

I woke up the next morning from a phone call from my manager.

"Hyuk Jae... I was able to fulfill your wish...you'll appear on Star King in two weeks, just before your first chemotherapy session, araso?" my manager asked.

"Nae...kamsamnida," I said before hanging up. I dreaded the thought of letting go of Heechul...just when I was beginning to like him a lot...in an unexplainable manner. I thought of going back to sleep, but sleep was impossible. Instead I got up and made my way out to the living room where everyone else was prancing around, some still in a bad mood from last nights news.

"Oh Hyuk Jae! Look! Breakfast!" Ryeowook pointed to a ghastly amount of breakfast food in the kitchen, bringing me back to my animal like appetite as of recently.

hmmm...one month...what is going to happen to the infamous Kim Heechul and the sick Lee Hyuk Jae? Ahh this is heartbreaking for me to make my bias so sick >.<

-LHY