NAEUN POV

"I think we should take a break." i swore i could feel my heartbreak as soon as the words left Hayoung's mouth.

The word hit me like a train; slicing deep into my heart, leaving wounds i know wouldn't heal.

After four years of a loving relationship, the biting words came out of nowhere.

"Okay." I replied curtly.

Hayoung didn't have to know how much it hurts, she can't know.

I wouldn't let her see me in pain. All that ever mattered to me was Hayoung's happiness, and i wouldn't ruin that.

"It's not that i don't love you because i do, i just--" Hayoung tried to explained but i cut her off. 

'No, please don't tell me.' I thought pleading.

So I interrupted her. "You don't owe me an explanation Hayoungie, you want a break that's fine."

"I hope we can still be friends." Hayoung said with pleading eyes.

'No.' Was all i could think, but i agreed anyway, for the sake of her. "Okay." 

Hayoung smile hesistantly and walked off to her car.

i watched her walked away, in my mind i was screaming for Hayoung to come back, and give me another chance, to not leave me.

But i watched as Hayoung disappeared around a corner and i knew what we had was now gone.

I couldn't take it anymore, and left the park without looking back, leaving Hayoung to simply wonder why she never saw me again that day.

In the days that followed, nothing was the same, i maintained the illusion that i was okay and everything was fine. But i wasn't and it wasn't.

 

 

 

 

---

i tried, i really did but no matter how much i wanted to move on, no matter how hard i tried to forget, the words still haunted my mind.

Everytime i close my eyes, i saw her face. Every silent moment, i heard her angelic voice. Repeating the same word over and over.

Every waking moment was filled with depressing thoughts of what once was, and what would never be again.

Everytime i slept, nightmares of the same sort plagued me frequently, it was no way to live.

I put on an expert poker face whenever i was around Hayoung, following her wishes to be friends. But it still hurts like hell.

The one person i felt comfortable confiding in, to tell anything to, didn't want me anymore.

My insecurities that Hayoung tried to put to rest all came rushing back, hitting me full force with absolutely no mercy.

I couldn't handle it, i had to leave. I told my parents i was leaving and i'm going to live with my sister in America.

They let me go without argument, knowing this was what i needed.

With a heavy heart and tears stinging my eyes, i packed my things, anything even remotely involved to Hayoung was tossed into a corner and it would stay there.

Hours later, my room was bare, furniture disassembled, all my belongings are packed.

That one corner, still populated with all my memories of Hayoung, was all i left behind.

 

 

 

 

---

they boxed up all of my things and shipped it to my sister's residence in New York, USA.

i said my goodbyes to my parents, each having their own farewells in short and simple paragraphs.

I'd walked out of my front door for the last time, leaving my key inside.

Calling a cab with two hours time to spare until my flight, i ordered the short drive to Hayoung's house.

Asking the cab driver to give me a moment, i stepped out and slowly made my way to the front door, knocking three times as i always did.

As soon as she opened the door and saw the somber look on my face, Hayoung knew something was wrong.

"Naeunie?" She called out.

I tried to ignore the fact it felt like my heart was on fire, and my throat was closing up, filling me with pain that was nearly unimaginable.

"I am going to talk and you are just going to listen, alright?" I told her, she nodded her head.

"I am leaving and i won't be coming back. Don't bother textng me or calling me, because my number's already changed. I just came to say goodbye, and to tell you that i think you are the most incredible girl in the world, and i wish you nothing but happiness for the rest of your life Hayoung ah." I said calmly.

"And before you think this is because i don't love you, it's exactly the opposite. I'm leaving because i love you too much. I can't be your friend, i can't stick around and see you be happy with someone else either. Just try to be happy and take care of yourself please." I added sincerely trying not to cry.

Hayoung's eyes shone with unshed tears as she listened. "Naeunie..."

 

 

 

 

 

NO ONE POV

Naeun shook her head, turning her heart to stone just to get through the final goodbyes.

"No. my flight leaves in an hour and a half. I came to say goodbye, nothing else. Goodbye Hayoung ah." Naeun bids and with that she walked out the door.

as soon as it closed, realization finally struck Hayoung. Naeun was gone. She'd never talked to her again.

But she had to know, she pulled her phone out of her pocket, dialling Naeun's number.

"This number has been disconnected, at the owner's request." The operator said on the other line.

 

 

 

 

 

 

MONTHS LATER

NAEUN POV

"Urghh.... this place is making me dizzy." I muttered, when i read the schedule my company had sent me.

it's been 6 months since i left Seoul and i am wondering what my members are doing.

I am infront of a cafe where Saeun had brought me but left me in a hurry due to her job.

When i have suddenly heard a laugh behind me followed by a girl's american accent. "I'm guessing that you are that Korean singer/actress we have been hearing about."

I turned around to see a rather good looking blonde hair girl wearing a smile. "Uhh, yeah. Am i in troubled?"

"Hmm, Not really." The girl replied with a wink.

"What can i do to help you? You seem puzzled?" She asked.

Though i don't want to trouble anyone, i knew i'd be screwed other wise, and handed the girl my phone.

"Do you know, where that place?" I asked politely.

She chuckled. "Ofcourse. I have been living here for too long."

"Oh yeah.." i replied sheepishly.

"So what brings you here?" The girl asked innocently as she begins to take a slow step away from the cafe.

I tensed up as i thought about it, and shook my head to get rid of my thoughts of Hayoung, knowing i'd probably fall apart if i let her take over my mind again.

"Just needed to get away.." i replied curtly.

"Why Albany New york? I mean no offense." She asked again giving me my phone.

"My sister lives here and it was the furthest i could get." I shrugged.

"I see, by the way my name is Stefhanie. Here is the place where that event would held. I actually have a sched here as well; so are you trying to get away from a break up or something?" Stefhanie asked light-heartedly.

Her smile immediately fading when she saw the look i am giving her.

I sighed. Before walking  away from her.

Throughout the rest of the events, Stefhanie frequently glanced over at me, i was barely paying attention to my surrounding.

She decided to leave me alone for the rest of the day and only tried to strike up a conversation after the event was finished. 

"I apologize if i struck a nerve or something, that certainly wasn't my intention." She sincerely said.

I turned around and sighed. "It's fine, just a sensitive topic for me, but you nailed it though."

"Can i ask what happened?" Stefhanie asked cautiously.

I bit my lip and shake my head. "No."

Stefhanie didn't pushed any more that day, though over the next few months she managed to get most of the story out of me.

 

 

 

---

"I love to paint or listened to music i like, when it's my free time." I said as we walked into my Sister's house one day after our event ends.

"Once you  have finished your painting, would you paint me like one of your french girls?" Stefhanie laughed.

I grabbed us some water and we relaxed on the couches.

"I don't know if i could finished my painting on time, but even so there is only one person i wanted to paint." I replied lost at the thought of her.

"Well, yeah. I was just kidding, i know that you only got one person in mind." She uttered genuinely.

Stefhanie took a drink of her water. "And beside i know how you are still not over her.  You are Just indenial about it. You know you have to heard her side and let her explained it."

I sighed. "But i am not ready yet to see her."

She only shakes her head.

"Now what could i use that for?" I asked poiting to a bouquet to change the topic.

She shrugged. "You could throw it or give it to me, unless you have feelings for that guy then you can keep it."

i walk closer to the bouquet and hand it to her.

"For some reason i thought you got a nice idea but that will do." 

"Don't you know This flowers are not special? Why would he give you this? Tssk. What An old fashioned guy. Don't ever date him." She muttered after sniffing the flowers.

"I will cherish that information for the rest of my life." I chuckled.

"Damn right, you will. Hey you wanna go to a pub tonight?" She asked.

I looked at her confusedly. "Don't you have a work to do tonight?"

She shook her head. "No, i am free tonight. How about you?"

"I am." I grinned.

"Cheers! We--" i cut her off.

"But i still need to go somewhere." I said curtly.

"Aww. What a killjoy." She mumbled lowly but i still heard it.

"i am not a kill joy. Jeez. Stop being so damn loud and don't pout it doesn't suit you." I replied.

i hated how cheerful and happy-go-lucky Stefhanie was. It was too much like Hayoung.

Maybe i just need to finished that painting so i can be void of any feelings toward her that always remind me everynight.

 

 

 

 

HAYOUNG POV

I stumbled into the house at some odd hou