What kind of a mother I am

“Hey Minmin-ah!” 

“Hyung! I missed you!” 

Jaejoong greeted Changmin with a hug. 

“I missed you, too... how is Halmoni?” 

“She is ok, getting old... But ok... where is my princess?” 

Changmin said, looking around not seeing Melody anywhere. 

“Well, we had a rough day... and she still feels upset... maybe you can help me cheer her up...” 

Jaejoong said, getting a confused look from the younger, as they walked towards the bedroom. 

“I took her with me to work and she got lost... she was scared... it was a mess...” 

“Omg...” 

Changmin sighed, opening the bedroom door, seeing the little girl lying on bed, playing with a doll plushie. 

“Why is my princess sitting alone? I looked everywhere for you... Minmin Samchun wants a hug!” 

Changmin said, walking towards the little girl whom didn’t move. 

“Melody-yah...” 

Changmin called looking back meeting Jaejoong’s sad eyes, telling him to leave them for a minute. 

“I’ll go make dinner....” 

Jaejoong said closing the door. 

“Melo-yah...” 

Changmin whispered lying down in front of the quiet girl... seeing her small frown. 

“Are you angry at me?” 

Melody looked up meeting his eyes for a second, before looking away shaking her head. 

“Are you mad at Umma?” 

Changmin asked seeing her Shake her head again. 

“Then who upset you? Tell me and I’ll kick them...” 

He said showing her his socked foot... but Melody kept quiet, looking at him. 

“Come on... tell Minmin Samchun! I’m here to help...” 

Melody sat up hugging her doll, looking at him. 

“Kick me” 

Changmin was confused of what the little girl said. 

“Kick you? Why would I kick you?” 

“You said you will kick who upset me... well, I’m upset with myself...” 

Melody said catching the other by surprise, making him chuckle. 

“Why are you upset with yourself?!” 

“Because I’m a bad girl... and Santa will not get me anything “ 

Melody yelled, sniffling before a couple of tears fell from her eyes. 

“Aigooo... tell me what happened?” 

Changmin said, wiping her tears. 

“I caused trouble at Umma’s work, and he fell sick because of me...”  

Melody said, her pouting lips were trembling. 

“He fell sick?” 

“Ennn!” 

Melody nodded, new tears falling from her eyes. 

“He fell down and Jihye emo put a needle in his arm... because of me...” 

Changmin got a rough idea of what happened, pulling the young girl up into his arms. 

“Umma didn’t fall sick because of you... and what happened today is not your fault... all we have to do is be careful next time...” 

Melody stayed quiet. 

“Umma is sad because you are sad... cheer up princess... it is going to be alright...” 

“Will Santa be mad at me for today?” 

Changmin bit his lip, holding his laughter, trying to sound serious. 

“I bet he knows you love Umma and he wants you and Umma to be happy on Christmas...” 

“Yeah... Santa loves happy kids...” 

Melody nodded at him. 

“And I bet Santa will get you many presents tonight... because you are a good girl...” 

“I am?” 

“Sure... We all make mistakes, but Santa knows what’s in our hearts... you love Umma, and he knows you have a good heart... so, as a good girl, let’s go help Umma!” 

****************************  

“Are you ok? Melody told me you fell sick?” 

Changmin asked as he helped Jaejoong wash the dishes after putting melody to bed. 

“I’m ok... it’s nothing... After Melody went missing, Yunho’s sister found her and brought her back... I was on the verge of breaking down... after I saw her and made sure she was alright... my body was pumped up with adrenaline... I just dropped I guess... fainted” 

Jaejoong said calmly as if it not a big deal. 

“Hyung, maybe you should do a checkup...” 

Changmin suggested, noting how pale and tired the other looked 

“I’m fine minnie... I just had a long stressful week...” 

“Why? Anything else happened?” 

“I gave Kang-ssi another payment” 

“What? When? How?” 

Jaejoong sighed and smiled to his dongsaeng knowing the other wouldn’t like him to meet those gangsters without him around. 

“Yunho gave me the holiday hours payment earlier, a good sum of money... and Taecyeon-ssi  was there... it went well... but still... you know how stressful it is for me to see them... I didn’t sleep last night... that didn’t help” 

“I would say... I didn’t want you to meet them without me there... but having a detective with you wasn’t a bad thing either...” 

Jaejoong nodded as they finished the dishes. 

“Thank you for talking Melody out of her sadness... she didn’t even answer me when I talked to her...” 

Jaejoong said sitting on the living room couch with Changmin. 

“I did nothing... let’s wrap up the gifts!” 

“Uncle Minmin is the best...” 

Jaejoong said smiling to his dongsaeng who did an aegyo face making him chuckle. 

**** 

After wrapping all the presents, lying them under the Christmas tree, Jaejoong and Changmin sat with cans of beer. 

“Cheers!” 

Changmin said, taking a gallop of his can, his eyes falling on the many wrapped up presents under the Christmas tree. 

“Hmm?” 

Jaejoong looked at the other confused seeing him chuckle. 

“Hehehe, nothing... it is just.... Melody is such a sensitive sweet girl...” 

 Changmin smiled, shaking his head taking another sip. 

“She is mad at me... isn’t she? She refused talking to me, she didn’t even look at me in the eye before you came...” 

The pale man looked down, feeling bumped. 

“She is not, actually...What I meant is, she will go crazy seeing all these presents from Santa” 

Changmin smiled at the other, pointing at the decorated tree. 

“She will... yeah” 

Jaejoong smiled, hearing Changmin scoff. 

“I can’t believe she thought Santa won’t get her anything, just because she got lost today...” 

“She said that?” 

Jaejoong asked in a low tone, feeling his heart sink. 

“Yeah, she thought Santa put her on the naughty list, because she got lost and you fell sick... I told her, it wasn’t her fault and that when she wakes up tomorrow, she would know I am right... when she sees all of the presents...” 

Changmin said, smiling at the memory of the little pouty face of Melody. 

“It wasn’t her fault... it is mine.. I can’t believe I left her alone... thinking I’ll be back quick... What was I thinking?” 

Jaejoong said biting his lower lip, feeling his eyes water. 

“Hyung....” 

Changmin moved next to him, palming his shoulder. 

“Melody is blaming herself for my mistake!... My Stupidity!!!”  

Jaejoong moaned, pulling his legs to his chest, pushing his hair off his forehead in distress.  

“I left her! What kind of a mother I am?!” 

Jaejoong sobbed his eyes, hugging his knees to his chest. 

“Ugh, Hyung...” 

Changmin sighed hugging the shaking thin body into his arms. 

“Wh-wh-what if s-s-something happened? Wh-what if someo-one took he-her?” 

Jaejoong stuttered crying hard, feeling the anxieties and fears he had today come out. 

“She didn’t... she is back to you... she is safe... think about that...” 

Changmin said, feeling his heart break, hearing Jaejoong’s sobbing. 

“Hyung... you shouldn’t be hard on yourself...” 

Jaejoong looked up, his blood shot eyes meeting the mismatched ones... seeing his dongsaeng smile at him gentle, his hand caressing his hair, gently. 

“You are an incredible mother... Melody is a lucky girl... and everyone can see that... you have a warm heart... you are strong... hardworking... you are a survivor... Hyung... Don’t think any less of yourself... things like this happen...” 

Jaejoong sniffled a few times, wiping his wet nose with his sleeve, before hugging Changmin’s neck thanking him. 

“Don’t thank me... you are just exhausted from what happened... you needed to let it out...” 

“I did... I guess...” 

Jaejoong said letting Changmin go, sitting back, wiping his tears, looking up at the other, smiling to him. 

“I don’t know, what would have happened to me without you... I love you... Uncle minmin!” 

Jaejoong said chuckling sadly. 

“Uncle minmin is at your service.” 

Changmin chuckled gently with him. 

“I’ll grab another beer... want one?” 

Jaejoong nodded to the other, sighing deep... he is indeed exhausted.